01-01-2007, 10:07 PM
The first letter didn't worry Tsunade too much. It should have, as it was from a lawyer, but Tsunade had not had enough experience yet with the administrative side of running a Hidden Village to realise the terrible peril that she was in. The lawyer in question was from the Wave Country and acting on behalf of a corporation called 'Great Hero Ramen', which had apparently bought up some of Tsunade's debts. The gist of the letter was a polite request for Tsunade to contact them to arrange a shedule of payments.
Tsunade crumpled the letter into a ball and threw it at the wastebin, missing (she might be one of the Legendary Three Ninja, but it takes more than than to get one ball of paper into a bin already full of of other wastepaper).
Poor Tsunade. Making such an amateur's mistake...
A week later there was another letter, this one with an additional paragraph apologising that the previous letter to this effect had apparently gone unaccountably astray. The pile of crumpled paper at the bin was getting quite large by now.
Another week passed and then the Ninja Postman told the Hokage that he had registered mail for her and could she just sign here, please. Even at her drunkest, Tsunade wasn't that foolish however. She declined and snitched the letter from his bag as he left. Another request for payments. Some people just didn't get a clue.
Sometime over the night, all the papers in and around Tsunade's bin vanished. She didn't bother to check that the clean up had been done by someone who was supposed to have access to her office.
The day after that, another letter arrived. Tsunade didn't have to sign for it so all was well. And it gave her a bit of a laugh. This 'Great Hero Ramen' company thought that they could _threaten_ the Hokage? Hilarious!
Still, there was no point being totally dismissive. They might be a nuisance - deny Naruto his staple foodstuff and sent him whining to her or something - so she had Shizune pull the file on the company. Unfortunately, that was the day that she gave Shizune the slip long enough to get well and truly hammered, and forgot all about it. The file got lost under a heap of paperwork.
The next letter was directly from the owner of 'Great Hero Ramen' advising that they had bought up even more of her debts and that either she could make a good faith move towards repaying them or action would be pursued. The signature on the letter was an illegible scribble.
By this time, of course, the file on 'Great Hero Ramen' was totally lost, so Tsunade grudgingly authorised a C-class mission to investigate it and assigned it to Kurenai's team. Not being a total idiot, Kurenai took Kiba and Shino to check with the local merchants for information while sending Hinata to interrogate Konoha's Number-One expert on all things Ramen.
Hinata took lengthy notes, fulfilling her part of the mission and flattering Naruto, who was therefore a little less disruptive than usual for the next few days, as well as indulging her a little, since they had had their conversation over a Ramen at Ichiraku's and so could, almost, from the correct angle, if you stretched a point, possibly be mistaken for what looked like it might resemble a date (although Hinata discreetly played it down a little when her father absently asked her what she'd done that day).
'Great Hero Ramen', Tsunade discovered, on reading the reports, was much more than a Ramen stall franchise (although it was that as well). It also made cup ramen and a range of fancier family-size ramen dishes that were all the rage amongst those who had little time to cook for themselves. Like Ninja, for example. Their other, less important, subsidiaries dealt with about half the food industry in the southern half of Leaf Country, the company having risen to prominence on the wave of prosperity fuelled by greater access to Wave Country now that they had built a bridge to the mainland.
In other words, they could probably afford ninja debt collectors. It was fortunate that Tsunade need have no fear of such a threat, as otherwise she could really have been in a bind.
A week later, Shizune vanished. No one could find her, or even trace her movements after she left the Hokage tower the previous night. Given her access to classified documents, this was naturally a major security issue. Tsunade was about to panic when another letter arrived from 'Great Hero Ramen'.
It wasn't so much a letter, either, more of a... receipt?
The value of Shizune's services, noted as the per day rate for a jounin-rank ninja assigned to a B-class mission less maintenance, was being deducted from Tsunade's debts. At this rate, the recipt noted, the debts would be cleared in just under ten thousand years. Would Tsunade now like to come to terms?
The Hokage groaned. If this came out - and sending out ninja against 'Great Hero Ramen' would undoubtfully reveal all - she'd be ruined. Konohagakure, her teacher's legacy and a responsibility she was holding in trust for Naruto, would be a laughing stock. She's going to have to face up to her responsibilities, now where did she put the 'Great Hero Ramen' company's address... oh, that's where the sake bottle went, well there's a little left and a day like this calls for a drink...
Without Shizune to keep her under control Tsunade goes on a colossal bender, and wakes up hungover, when Gai is bashing on her door and wailing at the top of his voice about his Team being missing!
Once Tsunade's shut him up and managed to get herself a hangover remedy, she finds another receipt on her desk. The value of three genin working on C-class missions, less the value of their maintenance, is now being deducted from her debts. The debts will now be cleared in a little more than eight thousand years. Could she at least let them know how far they need to push before she deals honestly with them, so that they can skip the intervening escalation?
Now Tsunade would like to have Shizune back, really she would. And Gai being quieter would be nice. But... this is reducing her debts, isn't it? And really, she's the goddamned Hokage, she can assign her ninja any missions she wants, can't she?
.oOo.
Naruto scratched his head as he read the letter from Tsunade. If he was reading this correctly, and a correspondence course in corporate law that was whiling away the spare hours when Jiraiya wasn't in a fit state to train him suggested that he was, then Tsunade was basically offering to rent him he VIllage's ninja en masse to pay off her debts.
She really needed that law course more than he did.
He slurped up another 'Great Hero Ramen' cup ramen (just the way he liked it) and reached for his pen. Now then, time to hone those negotiation skills.
It would go down in history that Konohagakure was the first Hidden Village ever to face a takeover bid, but Naruto was pretty sure that if he managed to get the Hyuga on Tsunade's back (and Hinata would probably be only too glad to 'vanish' and cause exactly that) then she'd agree to just about anything.
"De facto Hokage now," he noted. "De jure when I get back..."
D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
Tsunade crumpled the letter into a ball and threw it at the wastebin, missing (she might be one of the Legendary Three Ninja, but it takes more than than to get one ball of paper into a bin already full of of other wastepaper).
Poor Tsunade. Making such an amateur's mistake...
A week later there was another letter, this one with an additional paragraph apologising that the previous letter to this effect had apparently gone unaccountably astray. The pile of crumpled paper at the bin was getting quite large by now.
Another week passed and then the Ninja Postman told the Hokage that he had registered mail for her and could she just sign here, please. Even at her drunkest, Tsunade wasn't that foolish however. She declined and snitched the letter from his bag as he left. Another request for payments. Some people just didn't get a clue.
Sometime over the night, all the papers in and around Tsunade's bin vanished. She didn't bother to check that the clean up had been done by someone who was supposed to have access to her office.
The day after that, another letter arrived. Tsunade didn't have to sign for it so all was well. And it gave her a bit of a laugh. This 'Great Hero Ramen' company thought that they could _threaten_ the Hokage? Hilarious!
Still, there was no point being totally dismissive. They might be a nuisance - deny Naruto his staple foodstuff and sent him whining to her or something - so she had Shizune pull the file on the company. Unfortunately, that was the day that she gave Shizune the slip long enough to get well and truly hammered, and forgot all about it. The file got lost under a heap of paperwork.
The next letter was directly from the owner of 'Great Hero Ramen' advising that they had bought up even more of her debts and that either she could make a good faith move towards repaying them or action would be pursued. The signature on the letter was an illegible scribble.
By this time, of course, the file on 'Great Hero Ramen' was totally lost, so Tsunade grudgingly authorised a C-class mission to investigate it and assigned it to Kurenai's team. Not being a total idiot, Kurenai took Kiba and Shino to check with the local merchants for information while sending Hinata to interrogate Konoha's Number-One expert on all things Ramen.
Hinata took lengthy notes, fulfilling her part of the mission and flattering Naruto, who was therefore a little less disruptive than usual for the next few days, as well as indulging her a little, since they had had their conversation over a Ramen at Ichiraku's and so could, almost, from the correct angle, if you stretched a point, possibly be mistaken for what looked like it might resemble a date (although Hinata discreetly played it down a little when her father absently asked her what she'd done that day).
'Great Hero Ramen', Tsunade discovered, on reading the reports, was much more than a Ramen stall franchise (although it was that as well). It also made cup ramen and a range of fancier family-size ramen dishes that were all the rage amongst those who had little time to cook for themselves. Like Ninja, for example. Their other, less important, subsidiaries dealt with about half the food industry in the southern half of Leaf Country, the company having risen to prominence on the wave of prosperity fuelled by greater access to Wave Country now that they had built a bridge to the mainland.
In other words, they could probably afford ninja debt collectors. It was fortunate that Tsunade need have no fear of such a threat, as otherwise she could really have been in a bind.
A week later, Shizune vanished. No one could find her, or even trace her movements after she left the Hokage tower the previous night. Given her access to classified documents, this was naturally a major security issue. Tsunade was about to panic when another letter arrived from 'Great Hero Ramen'.
It wasn't so much a letter, either, more of a... receipt?
The value of Shizune's services, noted as the per day rate for a jounin-rank ninja assigned to a B-class mission less maintenance, was being deducted from Tsunade's debts. At this rate, the recipt noted, the debts would be cleared in just under ten thousand years. Would Tsunade now like to come to terms?
The Hokage groaned. If this came out - and sending out ninja against 'Great Hero Ramen' would undoubtfully reveal all - she'd be ruined. Konohagakure, her teacher's legacy and a responsibility she was holding in trust for Naruto, would be a laughing stock. She's going to have to face up to her responsibilities, now where did she put the 'Great Hero Ramen' company's address... oh, that's where the sake bottle went, well there's a little left and a day like this calls for a drink...
Without Shizune to keep her under control Tsunade goes on a colossal bender, and wakes up hungover, when Gai is bashing on her door and wailing at the top of his voice about his Team being missing!
Once Tsunade's shut him up and managed to get herself a hangover remedy, she finds another receipt on her desk. The value of three genin working on C-class missions, less the value of their maintenance, is now being deducted from her debts. The debts will now be cleared in a little more than eight thousand years. Could she at least let them know how far they need to push before she deals honestly with them, so that they can skip the intervening escalation?
Now Tsunade would like to have Shizune back, really she would. And Gai being quieter would be nice. But... this is reducing her debts, isn't it? And really, she's the goddamned Hokage, she can assign her ninja any missions she wants, can't she?
.oOo.
Naruto scratched his head as he read the letter from Tsunade. If he was reading this correctly, and a correspondence course in corporate law that was whiling away the spare hours when Jiraiya wasn't in a fit state to train him suggested that he was, then Tsunade was basically offering to rent him he VIllage's ninja en masse to pay off her debts.
She really needed that law course more than he did.
He slurped up another 'Great Hero Ramen' cup ramen (just the way he liked it) and reached for his pen. Now then, time to hone those negotiation skills.
It would go down in history that Konohagakure was the first Hidden Village ever to face a takeover bid, but Naruto was pretty sure that if he managed to get the Hyuga on Tsunade's back (and Hinata would probably be only too glad to 'vanish' and cause exactly that) then she'd agree to just about anything.
"De facto Hokage now," he noted. "De jure when I get back..."
D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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![[Image: smile.gif]](http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/smile.gif)
are.