Drunkard's Walk Forums

Dammit, I'd thought about posting that character generator here. Why didn't I? >_

---

Pronounced "shy guy."

Y'know, this makes too much sense considering. http://i47.tinypic.com/24fihb6.jpg]Linked due to unfortunate connotations of the end dialog...

That character generator is broken, they mixed up Kung-Fu and Wierd Kung-Fu :p The second one is far more likely.
E: "Did they... did they just endorse the combination of the JSDF and US Army by showing them as two lesbian lolicons moving in together and holding hands and talking about how 'intimate' they were?"
B: "Have you forgotten so soon? They're phasing out Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

From the author of Cutting Loose in his One-Two shot Altered Preliminaries:

Ino convincing Shika to go along with her latest matchmaking scheme:

Quote:"You barely even have to do anything." Ino assured the lazy boy. "Just complain a lot and act like you don't want to be involved or even be having the conversation."
"That shouldn't be hard." Shikamaru deadpanned.

Later:

Quote: "I just don't buy it Shikamaru; she's obviously playing with Naruto." Ino declared. Realizing that she was the topic of Ino's conversation, Sakura quickly hid behind the nearest tree to listen in. "You were there, you heard what she said and you could tell she meant every word of it, and now she thinks that stupid excuse and a pity date will make everything better?"
"Why do I have to listen to this?" Shikamaru complained.
"I mean, everyone knows she can barely stand the guy; she can't go five minutes without trying to beat the crap out of him." Ino continued, heedless of her companion's indifference to her ongoing rant.
"You know, maybe if Sakura wasn't always hitting Naruto in the head and killing his braincells he'd be smarter." Shikamaru idly commented. "Let's just hope she stops while he still remembers more words than 'believe it' and 'I'm gonna be Hokage.'"
That got a laugh out of Ino. "Nice one Shikamaru." Once Ino's amusement faded, she went back to her favorite pastime of ranting about Sakura. "So what do you think she said that finally pushed him over the edge anyway? After all the insults he just took from without doing anything about it she must have said something really nasty to set him off like that…"
"Who cares?" Shikamaru groaned.
"You know, Naruto's not such a bad guy really; yeah, he's an annoying little moron, but he certainly never did anything to deserve everything Sakura said to him." Ino paused in thought for a moment, and then said. "I really need to come up with a new nickname for her; Billboard Brow was good when that was her worst feature, but now it feels just a little lacking. I suppose I could always just add bitch onto the end of it…"
"Choji is so much less of a drag than you are."
"You know, you can tell Naruto doesn't really buy Sakura's story." Ino declared. "Sure, he's smiling and acting like his usual self, but you can tell that deep down he's still hurting. And the worst part is that Sakura's going to get away with it all, and all it took her was a story nobody really believes and a fake pity date. He really deserves better, but I guess he feels like he doesn't have any other friends so he has to put up with her, no matter how bad she is."
"Are you even listening to anything I say?" Shikamaru complained.
"Not a bit." Ino replied cheerfully.

And then there's this from The Many Misadventures of Sakura Haruno. (NSFW warning) Forest of Death after the other two are unconscious, Sakura notices the seal on Naruto due to the Snake Sannin's screwing around:

Quote:With a start, Sakura realized that she couldn't quite see all of the design's on Naruto's stomach, as his pants covered up the bottom part of the mass of symbols. Curiosity fought a brief war with decency, and Sakura rationalized that she needed to inspect the rest of the symbol if she wanted any answers about Naruto's current condition. Maybe if she saw the whole design on Naruto's stomach she would be able to make sense of things and have an idea about how to treat his condition. She redoubled her fervent prayers that Naruto wouldn't wake up to find her yanking his pants down, even though it was only a couple inches, and added a prayer that nobody would happen across them in the next few minutes

And:

Quote:With an enraged snarl, Sakura grabbed the waistband of Naruto's pants and yanked on them with all her might while practically shouting "Come off you stupid pants!". She had originally only planned to move the pants down a couple inches to see the rest of the design on Naruto's stomach, but her pissed-off full-strength yank pulled them clean off the boy's body, and the triumphant girl held them up over her head like some sort of trophy, celebrating her victory over stubborn, heavy, knocked out boys with pants that remained stubbornly in place. "Take that stupid pants that won't come off! You're no match for Sakura Haruno! CHA!"

Sakura freaks out obviously:

Quote:So, Naruto and Sasuke could never know about any of this, which meant she would have to get all of his clothes back on him, and then do her best to forget that any of this had ever happened. "Dammit! I spent all that time getting his pants off, and now I have to put them back on again!"

Of course the Sound team is hidden in the bushes and is getting not the wrong impression so much as an extreme one. The whole conversation between the members as they watch Sakura accidently pants Naruto and then deliberately does the same to the other of her team mates (purely to prove that Sasuke has to have better tackle of course) is an absolute scream - too long to put here but:

Quote:"You know, Zaku's got a point." Kin unexpectedly agreed with her teammate. "I'm not comfortable just sitting in the woods watching her rape those guys either, it's just weird; we should leave."
"Seriously?" Dosu asked dully. "You want us to abandon an excellent strategic position and possibly compromise our entire mission and offend Orochimaru-sama just because you're feeling uncomfortable?"
"Yes." Zaku and Kin said almost simultaneously. "I'm just really uncomfortable watching boys be sexually molested and not doing anything about it." Zaku added.
"Is it because of Orochimaru-sama?" Kin asked sympathetically.
"I don't like to talk about it." Zaku said flatly.
"Is that why you ran away screaming when we saw that one-eyed snake earlier?" Kin inquired, still sounding very sympathetic to her teammate's plight.

Ok, maybe I'm weird but I nearly laughed myself sick through the whole scene.

Quote:That character generator is broken, they mixed up Kung-Fu and Wierd Kung-Fu :p The second one is far more likely.

I second this, only because I couldn't first this.

Quote:[b][b][b]Necratoid[/b][/b] wrote:[/b]

---

Quote:That character generator is broken, they mixed up Kung-Fu and Wierd Kung-Fu :p The second one is far more likely.

I second this, only because I couldn't first this.

I interpreted that as Weird (even for Nerima) Kung-Fu.  That any Kung-Fu would be weird was covered by the title, "Random [i][i][i]Ranma[/i][/i][/i] Character Generator."

  
----------
No, I don't believe the world has gone mad.  In order for it to go mad it would need to have been sane at some point.

Quote:There was a male elf clad in black pants, a black cake hat (a short cylinder, flat-topped, shaked like a cake) with a wide brim, a black buttoned shirt, black gloves and a black racoon mask (the kind which basically covers the region around your eyes and noting else). His only color was he wore a badge which depicted a circle with a broad range of colors in it like a spectrum. It represents a planar portal, one of the type known as 'color pools'. He was dark skinned with short black hair and a nicely done moustache, and he had a rapier on one hip, a whip on the other and a crossbow in his hands with a quiver on his back. He stood upon... the pole things that jut sideways from masts and you hang the sails on them.

Next to him stood a pink pony with a wavy pink mane, wearing exactly the same outfit as him, except that she had a pie badge, had a spatula instead of a rapier, some sort of icing spreader thing instead of a whip and a pie balanced on each of her forehoofs as she stood unnaturally bipedally.

Words fail me.

"MANUEL OF THE PLAINS!" the Belcadizians shouted as one in utter shock.

From John Biles' D&D/MLPFIM crossover over on Spacebattles
''We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat
them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.''

-- James Nicoll

From Peptuck's most recent chapter of Renegade:

Quote:Zaeed Massani was a damned dangerous man, famed for taking down biotics, krogan, and asari commandos., as well as sundry ordinary soldiers, thugs, goons, bounty hunters, mercenaries, armored vehicles, aircraft, naval vessels, the occasional starship, a space station, and one very unlucky dirigible. He'd even been featured in Badass Weekly, and that was a publication with standards. But he wasn't badass enough - or fool enough - to take on a few dozen heavily-armed mercenaries in their own territory by himself.
But that was why Zaeed Massani cheated. That was why he used a car bomb to open the door, and it was why he was stomping through the front gate of the enemy stronghold in a suit of REV12-Wolverine mechanized armor mounting a triple-barreled armor-piercing mass accelerator and a four-shot, rapid-reloading rocket-propelled grenade launcher.
It was only prudent.

---
"Oh, silver blade, forged in the depths of the beyond. Heed my summons and purge those who stand in my way. Lay
waste."

In amongst some Crossovers That Must Be posted to RPG.net, http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?578 ... st14280852]Shadowjack's watched episode 104 of Sailor Moon S... and I'm deliberately not quoting the funny bits near the start.

Quote:Enter Haruka and Michiru, dramatically, with swirl of rose petals. They are dressed once again in traditional robes.

Usagi: /mutters something hypocritical about people who love dramatic entrances.

Quote:Usagi: "I detect a distinct lack of sweet cakes and cookies. This is gonna be cultural, isn't it?"

Quote:Eudial: "He said he's had some tea and had a brilliant idea. Hey, for a guy who pays as well as the Prof, I think we can afford to take some silly jobs for him, right? He probably won't remember anyway. Yeah, I'll see if he'll share some of his 'tea' on the way back. No way he comes up with this one clean and sober."

Quote:Usagi: "What, did I walk into a tea ceremony manga by mistake? Somebody stop him before something breaks! This is me in the room!"
Everyone else: …!

Quote:Chagarma: /smacks Chibi-Usa silly. "Finally! Now that someone worthy of respect has appeared, I can entertain the guests!"
Luna: "Well, thank you, but the two Sailors are worthy of respect, too."

Quote:Usagi: "That's no problem. You see, right now, your adult self is going to walk around that corner, having time travelled back to this moment to take you off our hands, because after all, who better to take care of yourself than yourself, right? She'll explain it all in terms you'll understand. All you have to do is remember to come back."
Chibi-Usa: "Okay."

They wait.

Usagi: "…I didn't think that'd work. Looks like I'm still lookin' after you, squirt. Not that I mind, really."

--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

For "Nobody Dies" fans, the author of "A Hero" (In which Dalek Sec gets dragged into the PMMM mess) has posted this little omake about one of the Daleks' personal boogeymen, the Dalek Inspector General:

Quote:

----------
I AM.
THRO-UGH THE WO-RD OF THE EM-PE-ROR SU-PRE-ME, I AM.
THRO-UGH THE WI-LL OF THE MA-STE-R RA-CE, I AM.
THRO-UGH THE FE-AR OF A-LL TH-AT LI-VES, I AM.
THRO-UGH TEN HUN-DRED THOU-SA-ND WOR-LDS CON-DEM-NED, I AM.
I AM A MO-NU-MENT TO DE-ATH. I AM A DES-TRO-YER OF WO-RLDS, AN EX-TER-MI-NA-TOR OF LES-SER BE-INGS, A BRI-NGER OF FI-RE AND A-SH.
I AM THE DA-LEK IN-QUI-SI-TOR GE-NE-RAL, YOUR NIGHTMARES MADE DA-LEK.
AND I
ST-ILL
FUN-CTI-ON!!
----------

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

That's EPIC, but not really funny. I still like it, but perhaps we need a thread dedicated to Quotes of Awesome.

Proginoskes Wrote:That's EPIC, but not really funny. I still like it, but perhaps we need a thread dedicated to Quotes of Awesome.

That could be interesting. I'd like to see some more Epic Quotery.
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

ECSNorway Wrote:

Proginoskes Wrote:That's EPIC, but not really funny. I still like it, but perhaps we need a thread dedicated to Quotes of Awesome.

That could be interesting. I'd like to see some more Epic Quotery.

Easy enough to start one.  As soon as someone does, I'll be happy to pin it to the top of the forum.
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

Thread of Awesome #1 created.
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

And one for here...

Quote:"Good afternoon, sir," the hotel clerk said with a bright smile. "How can we
help you today?"

"Is the penthouse available?" he asked.

"It is, sir," the clerk agreed. "How long will you be staying?"

"Why don't we say three weeks for now with the option of taking another two
later," he replied. It was unlikely that he'd stay in one place more than half a
dozen days without feeling the need to move to another, but there was no need to
tell that to the drone on the other side of the desk.

"Your name please, sir?"

"Cash," he replied, putting his briefcase on the counter.

"Your first name, Mr. Cash?"

"In advance," he said.

"Of course, sir," the clerk agreed. "Will that be all?"

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

ECSNorway Wrote:Thread of Awesome #1 created.

...and pinned.
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

Aww, ECS, you're seriously going to throw out a quote like that and not tell us where it's from?

Its from the Caer Azkaban yahoo group mailing list.

I used to make the attempt to be subtle in trying to apply the unwritten rule about proper attributes for quoting purposes.

I gave that up as it was always ignored. So, Does any body know how I would go about hiring the Ree to make a hit?

In the MLP/Mystara thread on Spacebattles, Mr Biles posted an updated map of his version of Mystara, and it was noted that there is a Fort Boatmurdered, right next to the Elephant Forest (the fort is in Equestrian territory, the forest is outside it)
Someone asked why the Fort was in Pony territory, Jonen C gave this response:

Quote:Dude, if it's the boatmurdered dwarves, they'll build anywhere they set their minds to it.
As in: "We build our first fortess in a swamp. It sunk. So we build a second fortress on top of it. It fell over and sunk. The third one caught fire, fell over and sunk. The fourth one was overrun by giant ants, caught fire, and the foundation settled and cracked and by the time we realized why the contractors had already fled the country. Then it sank. The fifth one stayed up, but had a seventeen degree list to the northwest, so we put the torch to it and started over. The sixth go, though. That was glorious. It was overrun by elephants, filled up with miasma and gore, caught fire, but mark my words: It. Fucking. Stayed. Up. So we put that in the win column and sold it to the ponies and moved to the riviera. Sod the swamp."

___________________________
"I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." - George Carlin

http://forums.spacebattle.../showthread.php?t=190449
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

From the latest update to MLP: Friendship is Adventuring.  While investigating a ruined temple we are given this bit:

Quote:I have to open that door," Pinkie said. "I made a *promise*."
"To who?" Fluttershy asked.
"Myself! To leave no door unopened, no stone unmossed, no cake uneaten!" Pinkie said.
"Hold on," I said. "Twilight and I will make sure it isn't trapped with magic."
"And I'll look for any mundane traps," Ivan said.
"Why would there be a trap on the cellar door?" Applejack asked.
"There is ALWAYS a trap on the door underground," Ivan said.
"Trust us, we deal with this sort of thing all the time," I said.
This is probably some crazy twenty level dungeon run by a mad wizard and if we didn't have to deal with the dragon eating us soon, I'd want to explore it, because mad wizards give the best toys if you win.
But they also tend to think that it's a good idea to put a barrel in a room, mark it 'sugar', then fill it with BEES.
Bees which somehow spit up cockatrices.
Who are on fire.

___________________________
"I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." - George Carlin

Another pony fic, this time with some (un?)fortunate that somehow got zapped there... along with his smart phone.

Quote:Now, I don’t want anyone to believe I’m crazy and think I argue with inanimate objects all the time but my first reaction was ‘NO, IT’S NOT!’ I hadn’t even been here for eight, much less nearly fourteen hours! And my battery was full! And I had five bars of Internet signal! Why I had Internet, I’ll never know. Equestria was blowing my mind on levels that I didn’t think were even remotely shakable. Eventually, I ended up blaming Pinkie Pie for it and moved on.

title and link, BA?
"No can brain today. Want cheezeburger."
From NGE: Nobody Dies, by Gregg Landsman
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5579457/1/NGE_Nobody_Dies

Through the Eyes of Another Pony on Equestria Daily.

Tags: [Human In Equestria][Comedy] and also 'Humans Are Not Monsters, Okay?'  Should also include 'SI' but, eh.  Pretty well done so far.  If he chooses to play up some of the darker tones, it seems like he could.  Realistically, I would expect his hinted-at past to come into play.  And his special talent just tickles the pyromaniac inside me so splendidly.  If I could smoke and not worry about lung cancer, I would take it up in an instant.