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The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Printable Version

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RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 02-21-2026

His Orangeness falls asleep during the first "Board of Peace" meeting

Considering he dozed during a meeting he wanted to attend, one wonders how well he'll handle the State of the Onion speech on Monday.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Labster - 02-22-2026

(02-21-2026, 01:07 PM)robkelk Wrote: His Orangeness falls asleep during the first "Board of Peace" meeting

Considering he dozed during a meeting he wanted to attend, one wonders how well he'll handle the State of the Onion speech on Monday.


Speaking of the Board of Peace, and surprisingly not The Onion, this actual graphic:

[Image: 5s5nmuydqmkg1.jpeg]

So all of the memes about giving Palestine to Albania actually came true?  ALBANIA STRONK!!! SKANDERBEG RIDES AGAIN!!!!

Oh, wait, wait.... US ambassador causes uproar by claiming Israel has a divine right to most of the Middle East

Imagine being Jordan, allying with the U.S. for decades and being more or less the nice guy of the ME... and realizing your security guarantees are worthless and Israel is staring hungrily in your direction.

Still, Kosovo sending military for the Board of Peace when they're still not in the United Nations is top kek.

@RK: Actually the State of the Onion was the annual speech given by Larry Wall at Perl conventions -- or it was until he gave up primary maintainership to other community members.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 02-22-2026

(02-22-2026, 05:00 AM)Labster Wrote: @RK: Actually the State of the Onion was the annual speech given by Larry Wall at Perl conventions -- or it was until he gave up primary maintainership to other community members.

Doesn't matter. If His Orangeness is going to insist on calling our Prime Minister (our head of government) "Governor" (our head of state, a different person), then I get to call your institutions by other institutions' names.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 02-24-2026

US hockey was bathed in a golden Olympic glow. Then Donald Trump and Kash Patel stepped in


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 02-25-2026

Five fact checks from Trump’s state of the union address

All five were found to be incorrect.


Any trade deal with Canada will include tariffs, says Trump's trade rep

Which means that our best tactic is to run out the clock. It took years to negotiate NAFTA, after all, so this is not unreasonable.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Labster - 02-26-2026

Bingo card update, 2026 edition:

Cuba vows to fight ‘terrorist aggression’ after attack from US-registered speedboat.  If that's not Bay of Pigs II: Electric Boogaloo, I don't know what on Earth is.  It was in a speedboat, so the attack was fast and furious.

US trade deficit swells in December as imports surge --- oh, are the trade deficits getting larger?  That's so weird.  It's almost like if people don't want to buy from you, it's worse than making their products less competitive.  And in a K-shaped economy, price doesn't affect the demand for foreign luxuries.

On the Epstein files remaining locked down: US justice department accused of withholding Trump-related Epstein files, after "everything" was released.  Hmmm.  Does it seem possible from the same department that hung a mega banner of Trump on the building?  Mega likely.

On the State of the Union address, which was hockey, gold medals, and 98% Trump re-runs: he did make it through his 2-hour mega speech.  Is he not as demented as we thought?  Or... was it Adderall?  He was definitely doing the robotic reading thing by the end.  I'm reminded of Umberto Eco reminiscing on how the fascists used to make such long speeches, that the first time he heard a one-paragraph speech from victorious partisans, it opened his eyes to the world.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-01-2026

RIP Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, Supreme Leader of Iran.

No cause of death announced, but the announcement came after the USA and Israel launched launched a major attack on his country.

PROTIP: Killing another country's leader and then calling for "regime change" reduces one's chances of getting a peace prize.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Labster - 03-01-2026

Hey, we gave Iran plenty of warning. First we increased tariffs on them, and they didn't back down. Then we tried negotiating with them, and they wouldn't accept our terms. Their leader gave defiant speeches saying to stand up the the United States, and the next round of negotiations were going nowhere.

With a warning like that... You know, I hope Mark Carney has been going to church lately, saying his prayers often. He may not be long for this world.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - classicdrogn - 03-01-2026

And here we all thou8ght it was Trump going senile when he told native-born (but brown) Americans to "go back to their third world shithole." Turns out it was actually his genius planning and vision for where he wanted to lead the nation!


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-03-2026

The Pentagon has confirmed that US forces struck Iranian targets using weapons that are copies of Iran's own Shahed 136 suicide drones.

Well, that just threw "plausible deniability" out the window. From now on, conspiracy theorists are going to wonder whether any Iranian attack was actually a false-flag attack from the USA instead.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Bob Schroeck - 03-03-2026

It has been my perception for quite a long time again that the Trump administration seems to think that "at least maintaining the appearance of being the good guys" is weak and woke.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Labster - 03-03-2026

[Image: 5xj0obufovmg1.jpeg]

The Yellow Turbans have been defeated by the Red Hats, nothing could make us lose the mandate of heaven now.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - classicdrogn - 03-04-2026

It ws just a little reminder that we've always been at war with Iran, why is everyone acting like it's ungood news? It's plainly peaknews!


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-05-2026

His Orangeness now has something in common with Salman Rushdie.

Ayatollah on state TV calls for 'the shedding of Zionist blood, the shedding of Trump's blood'


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Labster - 03-06-2026

Trump says no deal with Iran until "UNCONDITIONAL SURRENDER".  It looks like we'll be involved in this limited police action with no nation building for a while, at least until the complete destruction of the Iranian state.

Trump has also said that the US Navy will convoy ships through the Persian Gulf.  Good luck with that.

The awkward truth dogging USMCA talks: 'They just hate Canada.'


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - classicdrogn - 03-06-2026

Well, it is all within convenient striking range of the Suez Canal. Just look at how much trouble the thing with the Evergiven was, and then figure on a broken, half-sunken wreck instead of an intact but grounded ship that can be nudged back off into the water with a few days' work...


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-08-2026

Millions of Americans can now claim Canadian citizenship by descent. But they have to prove it

Quote:Prior to Bill C-3, An Act to Amend the Citizenship Act (2025), citizenship by descent for those born abroad was limited to the first generation.

But now, Canadian citizenship is being retroactively granted to people born before the new law came into effect on Dec. 15, 2025, who would have been citizens if not for the first-generation limit.

...

The change in law came following a 2023 Supreme Court of Canada decision that found the first-generation limit was unconstitutional, making the certificate “the hottest ticket in 2026,” according to Cassandra Fultz, a regulated Canadian immigration consultant.

You can't just say that you have Canadian ancestors and expect to get citizenship, though. You have to prove it.





U.S. customs searched a record number of electronic devices last year

Quote:Officers searched 55,318 computers, cellphones and other devices in 2025, up 17.6 per cent from the 47,047 devices searched in 2024 and up 32.4 per cent from the 41,767 devices searched in 2023, according to statistics from U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP).

...

While searches of devices for non-U.S. citizens has been gradually rising, the number of searches of devices belonging to American citizens has risen sharply — from 8,657 in 2023 to 13,590 in 2025.

Last year, the Canadian government updated its travel advisory for the United States to warn that U.S. customs officers have the power to search phones and laptops at the border. U.S. Ambassador Pete Hoekstra pushed back, saying searches of electronic devices were isolated events.

On the Canadian side of the border, the number of searches and the percentage of passengers whose electronic devices have been searched by the Canada Border Services Agency (CBSA) while entering Canada is much lower and has been declining in recent years.





Greenlanders should still worry about Trump's designs on their island, Governor General says

(Yes, Canada has a Governor and a Prime Minister. One handles matters of state, the other runs the government. Don't mix them up.)

Quote:Although U.S. President Donald Trump's interest in taking over Greenland appears to have faded — at least publicly — Canada's Governor General says concern remains that the fight over the semi-autonomous territory isn't over yet.

"Even though the threat has kind of gone to the wayside … People are still very worried it could come back," Gov. Gen. Mary Simon said in an interview airing Sunday morning on Rosemary Barton Live.

"It creates a lot of anxiety. It creates a lot of turmoil," she added.

Simon, Canada’s first ambassador for Circumpolar Affairs and a former ambassador to Denmark, said she's told Greenlanders that Canada supports them and the Danes, who control the territory's foreign policy and defence.





Video (14:51): The unanswered question in the U.S.-Israel war on Iran: Why?


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - classicdrogn - 03-08-2026

Because 'Operation Epstein? Fuggeddaboutit.' It's all in the initials!


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-11-2026

Governments across Asia order work from home, thanks to Iran war

Because no fuel to run the in-city transportation infrastructure is getting through the Strait of Hormuz -- they're saving what they can for when the tanker ships stop showing up.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-12-2026

Ig Nobel Prize flees US for Switzerland after 35 years over safety concerns

Quote:Marc Abrahams, founder, emcee of the ceremony, and the magazine's editor, said: "During the past year, it has become unsafe for our guests to visit the country. We cannot in good conscience ask the new winners, or the international journalists who cover the event, to travel to the USA this year."



RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - classicdrogn - 03-12-2026

... All they would have needed to do was announce they were giving Trump an Ig Nobel for his progress on world peace and he'd have made sure it was handled. It wouldn't even have been a compromise in the meaning of the awards.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Labster - 03-12-2026

Honestly, I thought it would be kinda funny if Trump won the Ig Nobels in every category this year. I mean, look at his achievements in economics of tariffs, physics of ICE, chemistry of adderall, dadaist literature, and the list just keeps going on.

Meanwhile, America's war situationship with Iran will continue until we finally discover the goal of the war which the dastardly Iranians have hidden from us.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - robkelk - 03-17-2026

Why allies aren't leaping to Trump's aid in Strait of Hormuz

Quote:Wendy Gilmour, a former NATO assistant secretary general for defence investment, said many countries may be reluctant to join a U.S.-led coalition and become a belligerent in a conflict with Iran.

"The NATO allies in particular, are going to be incredibly cautious before coming in behind the United States, frankly," Gilmour told CBC News on Monday.

"The U.S. and Israel have launched a war of choice by attacking Iran. The aftermath of that does not seem to have been particularly well thought through."

Jim Townsend, a former U.S. deputy assistant secretary of defence for European and NATO policy, said that while it is in Europe's economic interests to keep traffic flowing through the Strait of Hormuz, many countries are "stung" by how Trump has treated them.

"There's not a lot of good feelings [from European countries] towards the United States right now, particularly because they were not part of the process in the run up to this war," Townsend told CNN on Monday.


Although one wonders why the USA is even looking for allies in this matter.

Quote:Trump appeared to realize — at least implicitly — that his call for help against Iran could be in vain by contradicting himself on the issue several times during his comments Monday at the White House.

Despite insisting that countries need to get involved, he also said: "We don't need anybody. We're the strongest nation in the world. We have the strongest military by far in the world. We don't need them."

You don't need us? Then we'll stay on the sidelines.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - Jinx999 - 03-20-2026

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/ce84073mr06t?post=asset%3Aee2ea808-5cf1-43ca-94a8-0a4cba4009a9#post

Well, there goes ANY chance the rest of NATO will help. And quite possibly ever voluntarily help in a US war ever again.


RE: The Imperial Presidency, Part 2 - classicdrogn - 03-20-2026

Fuck Trump and all his fuckery making the US a laughingstock when it's not outright the bad guy. May a meteorite, lightning bolt, and/or runaway piano strike the bastard dead, because it can't come soon enough.