ROTFL - Rise From the Dead

[Norgarth]

another real life example

Just as one comment. I was watching [Monty Python and the Holy Grail] with a lot of people who had never seen it before. So the last gerat event was a surprise. And then one teenaged girl, looked at her family with wide eyes and said: "That really wasn't Arthur--it was just a bunch of SCA players who got high and were rampaging around Great Britain."

[Matrix Dragon]

... I mean, is she wrong?

[drakensis]

"Shidi, you recently traveled through the Gāoyóu lowlands, correct? Did you encounter anything strange?"
Liu Qingge thought about it, then shook his head. "No, it was pretty quiet. There was a plant monster, but we took care of it. Why?"
He Qian sifted through a stack of reports before apparently finding the one he was after. "Did anyone mention ghost activity? There are reports of a beautiful sword spirit appearing at dawn near Xièjiǎ town," he explained. "But no confirmation."
Liu Qingge shook his head. "No, we stayed in an inn there, and I was outside in the morning, doing my warmups. I didn't sense anything unclean."
"Mystery solved, then." He Qian made a mark on a report while Liu Qingge frowned in puzzlement.

The Grand Unified Theory of Shěn Qīngqiū

[classicdrogn]

"I brought yer sommat," the huge green man told him, before digging about in the pockets of his greatcoat for a bit. "Little humie like yer 'aven't got the muscle to handle much dakka yet, but a bit o' hackin' and sawin' and I fink I got 'un that'll see ya right 'till ya get on a bit in yer wierdboy trainin'... Ah, 'ere we go!"

The... weapon... Hagrid produced bore some faint resemblance to Uncle Vernon's shotgun, before it had been tied into a knot, but only just. It seemed to be about three times bigger around in the part were the bullets would come out, and clearly bore the marks of some vigorous tinkering in dents, gouges, patches wrapped with silvery tape, and featured unevenly sawed surfaces on both ends. It was just barely light and small enough with those modifications that he could keep it relatively stable when he tried holding it in a similar ready position as he'd seen people do on the telly.

It was hardly the first thing he'd have thought of when someone mentioned wizards, but Harry had to admit that it was bloody wicked.

Sadly, the 40k/HP fic Heavy Pewter and the Sod-Off Shoota does not exist on the current year internet, and this quote file snippet is all that I have.

[robkelk]

"Well…" Ranma finally spoke up. "We… uhh… I tried something different while we were stuck in our hospital room. To… make Ryo feel better. I tried ki sharing with him."

Doctor Hirano raised an eyebrow, confused a moment, then blinked and nodded. "Ah, yes. That's a… hmmm… Shinto thing? Yes, well…" He took off his glasses and started polishing them. "While I respect your beliefs, and I realize they are quite real to you, I'm afraid that in the interests of your medical well-being I must insist we pursue all scientific avenues of explanation. I have seen many so called 'miracles' attributed to faith-healing, only for said effect to merely be…"

Ranma sighed, held up her left hand and concentrated for a moment, summoning a small but bright ball of ki.

Doctor Hirano's glasses dropped from suddenly nerveless fingers.

"Look! Science!" Ranma said brightly.

What Do You Want, Chapter 14

[drakensis]

"Hold on now. I might be insane, but I'm hardly deluded, you Borg-tube'd looking motherfu-" Mary began to speak as she finally turned her attention to the sight before her. "The hell?"

Horus followed her gaze, curious as to what had caught her attention, before he had an epiphany. He chuckled, catching sight of her eyes displaying an exaggerated caricature of confusion.

"Ah. Of course. The greater symbolism of the Sea of Souls eludes a base and dimwitted creature such as yourself." Horus crowed triumphantly, gesturing to the table before him.

Mary stared in utter dismay and befuddlement at the sight of a half-painted diorama of Lupercal's court, complete with scaled miniatures of the occupants of the room. She drank in the details, internally screaming over the fact Horus was a-fucking-parently painting 32 millimeter scale models while he was waiting for them.

Magical Girl Mag'ladroth-chan

[Aleh]

The KPop Demon Hunters fanfic Take My Hand has the entire bizarreness of the movie's premise get revealed on live, international TV. That leads to this, excerpted in its entirety because it's really, really hard to find a part that doesn't qualify for this thread:

About an hour later, Choi Kang-min, Minister of National Defense for South Korea, was brushing his teeth and contemplating bed when his phone rang. The caller ID flashed: Seo Jin-taek. It took half a beat for his brain to catch up. Director of the National Intelligence Service, his thoughts supplied and not someone who calls lightly.

He straightened instinctively and answered. “Yes?”

A firm voice responded. “Sir, we have a first contact situation.”

Kang-min paused, toothbrush still in hand. “Come again?”

“We’ve confirmed contact with another dimension. Early intelligence indicates it’s fully populated and at least part of its leadership is hostile.”

“…Another dimension.”

“Yes, sir. It appears to be inhabited by what are best described as demons. Special Forces Command has secured a perimeter around a portal that opened in central Seoul. They’ve also taken custody of a friendly entity requesting asylum.”

Kang-min stared into his bathroom mirror, foam forgotten. “Demons.”

“Yes, sir. There’s more. The K-pop group HUNTR/X appears to be the latest generation of a private organization dedicated to monitoring and countering incursions from this dimension.”

There was a long pause.

“A K-pop group.”

“Yes, sir. Their rival group, the Saja Boys, are actual demons originally sent to sabotage the barrier between worlds. But they defected… after their lead singer fell in love with the lead singer of HUNTR/X. The individual we have in custody is one of the Saja Boys.”

Kang-min slowly sat on the edge of his bed. “So… a demon boy band… changed sides… for love.”

The voice did not falter. “Yes, sir. In addition, approximately eighty-four minutes ago, Jinu, the lead vocalist of the Saja Boys, was kidnapped by the demon king, Gwi-Ma, during a live broadcast of the International Idol Awards. He opened a portal on stage and forcibly pulled Jinu through it.”

“So he’s kidnapped now.”

“Yes, sir. The remaining Saja Boys, minus one who stayed behind, and all members of HUNTR/X entered the demon realm in pursuit. They used a teleporting tiger instead of the portal.”

“…A teleporting tiger.”

“Yes, sir. Meanwhile, the member who stayed behind, he goes by Romance, took questions from the audience. Some technicians and HUNTR/X’s manager decided to insert a portable camera rig through the portal. On live TV.”

Kang-min deadpanned, “Naturally.”

“The portal is apparently located above an active volcano. When lava splashed through, the show’s staff finally initiated evacuation and waited for the police to arrive.”

Silence.

Kang-min checked his watch, sighed, and said flatly, “I don’t know what kind of prank this is, but I’m not amused. Expect a formal complaint in the morning.” And he hung up.
 
Two minutes later, his phone rang again.

This time, the caller ID indicated that it was the personal line of the President of South Korea.

He stared at it, throat tightening. Then answered.

The President’s voice was calm but urgent. “Kang-min, it’s real. There’s a portal to a hell dimension in the middle of Seoul. A convoy is on its way. Get to the command center.”

Click.

Kang-min sat in silence, toothbrush still in hand, mint foam slowly dripping onto his pajama shirt.

“…Right,” he said. “Demons. K-pop. Volcano. Tiger. Portal.”

I've linked to the specific chapter because, well, the rest of it isn't much less funny.