Is there any way to run this as a remotely power-balanced fanfic? Any way at all?
*thinks*
Okay, so let's suppose that our friend Washuu-chan *doesn't* immediately take to Harry and start mothering him. Instead, he catches her in one of her more misanthropic moods, and she immediately presses him into service as a minion. She's a crazy, scary lady, but the more minion-like he behaves, the less crazy and scary she is at *him*. After a relatively short while, he stops showing up at the Dursley's at all - which means that Dumbledore's warning devices all start gong off. A bit more investigation winds up with Dumbledore showing up with a backup wizard (McGonagall, say), and actually managing to get into Washuu's lab. He sees that Harry is doing pretty well, but not where he should be, and tries to play "older, wiser, icon of the Light" at her. For various more-or-less obvious reasons, this goes over like a lead balloon. She does something intended to be silly/scary, wands are pulled, and Dumbledore catches her in a stunner (we're trying to keep the relative power levels somewhat even here, she wasn't aware of their capabilities, and he really is *very* good at what he does). At that point, they memory charm her, grab Harry, and abscond, before trying to figure out what the heck to do . She wakes up, wonders what the heck is going on, checks the security tapes, and becomes infuriated.
...and now we have a Harry, at whichever age you want to target it for (it's really up to you when Washuu's lab wanders over to the door under the stairs, so long as it's before he gets his letter) who's effectively a reasonably canny, reasonably capable, quite young minion (who knows it) in a tug of war between two very powerful, not actually evil individuals who really have almost no chance of getting along (and who's rivalry/war is escalating as time goes by). He's learned to do what he has to do to make such people happy - but this generally means doing what they tell you to, telling them what they want to hear, and not attracting any more attention than you have to. Voldemort's plans get derailed relatively early when Washuu hears about the odd interactions with Harry's scar (she has no idea what the deal with it is, but it's obviously strange and magical and therefore fascinating) and kidnaps Quirrel one night in order to examine him more closely and experiment on the poor blighter. In his place, she leaves a stasis-locked Ryoko (who had *not* agreed to this, but mommy has ways of coercing her anyway) with instructions on how to break her out of stasis and a note on how Washuu's sure she'll be a better DADA teacher than the pathetic wretch she'll be replacing. Eventually Voldemort comes back on screen as the core of an "escaped lab experiment run amok", but that isn't for at least a plot arc or two. This Harry isn't conquering the world. He's trying desperately to survive as a pawn in a battle between two (and then three) tremendously powerful individuals. It's lighter on the death and heavier on the hijinks than wars in the Potterverse, but that's just in keeping with the Tenchi Muyo way of things.
Also, Luna thinks that Washuu is just the nicest lady she's ever met, and can't understand what all the fuss is about.
*thinks*
Okay, so let's suppose that our friend Washuu-chan *doesn't* immediately take to Harry and start mothering him. Instead, he catches her in one of her more misanthropic moods, and she immediately presses him into service as a minion. She's a crazy, scary lady, but the more minion-like he behaves, the less crazy and scary she is at *him*. After a relatively short while, he stops showing up at the Dursley's at all - which means that Dumbledore's warning devices all start gong off. A bit more investigation winds up with Dumbledore showing up with a backup wizard (McGonagall, say), and actually managing to get into Washuu's lab. He sees that Harry is doing pretty well, but not where he should be, and tries to play "older, wiser, icon of the Light" at her. For various more-or-less obvious reasons, this goes over like a lead balloon. She does something intended to be silly/scary, wands are pulled, and Dumbledore catches her in a stunner (we're trying to keep the relative power levels somewhat even here, she wasn't aware of their capabilities, and he really is *very* good at what he does). At that point, they memory charm her, grab Harry, and abscond, before trying to figure out what the heck to do . She wakes up, wonders what the heck is going on, checks the security tapes, and becomes infuriated.
...and now we have a Harry, at whichever age you want to target it for (it's really up to you when Washuu's lab wanders over to the door under the stairs, so long as it's before he gets his letter) who's effectively a reasonably canny, reasonably capable, quite young minion (who knows it) in a tug of war between two very powerful, not actually evil individuals who really have almost no chance of getting along (and who's rivalry/war is escalating as time goes by). He's learned to do what he has to do to make such people happy - but this generally means doing what they tell you to, telling them what they want to hear, and not attracting any more attention than you have to. Voldemort's plans get derailed relatively early when Washuu hears about the odd interactions with Harry's scar (she has no idea what the deal with it is, but it's obviously strange and magical and therefore fascinating) and kidnaps Quirrel one night in order to examine him more closely and experiment on the poor blighter. In his place, she leaves a stasis-locked Ryoko (who had *not* agreed to this, but mommy has ways of coercing her anyway) with instructions on how to break her out of stasis and a note on how Washuu's sure she'll be a better DADA teacher than the pathetic wretch she'll be replacing. Eventually Voldemort comes back on screen as the core of an "escaped lab experiment run amok", but that isn't for at least a plot arc or two. This Harry isn't conquering the world. He's trying desperately to survive as a pawn in a battle between two (and then three) tremendously powerful individuals. It's lighter on the death and heavier on the hijinks than wars in the Potterverse, but that's just in keeping with the Tenchi Muyo way of things.
Also, Luna thinks that Washuu is just the nicest lady she's ever met, and can't understand what all the fuss is about.