[RFC][SI][Multi-Xover]Being You is Suffering

[Bluemage]

Glad to hear you're keeping sane.  Well, sane-ish. ^^
I like the first snip, but honestly?  I don't think it really has a place in the story.  In your *canon*, yes; I think it's something that should've happened.  But in the story?  I feel like it foreshadows the whole 'embryonic being of power' aspect of things too strongly and too soon.
Not that I wouldn't mind a slight bit more foreshadowing of that, but this doesn't feel like the right way to do it.
The second snip... the part you posted really doesn't feel like AFY! to me.  That particular bit is more like NUKES BAD!, with a side of Imperial Japan, *^&% No!.  I can only assume that it's taken out of a greater AFY! context.
The third bit... dropping that was a wise decision.  Perhaps it's just a personal soft spot, but something about how Garrick brought up his religious beliefs and everybody else took them at face value reminded me of Skysaber.
I did NOT like having to type that.  Not one bit.

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My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Atom Bomb of Courteous Debate. Get yours.

I've been writing a bit.