The Dead Dove Locker -- "I don't know what I expected."

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The Dead Dove Locker -- "I don't know what I expected."

Mamorien Offline

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RE: The Dead Dove Locker -- "I don't know what I expected."

#72

01-05-2026, 06:08 PM

In a prefatory note, Dukerino Wrote:We are BACK! Happy new year, everyone!

I have some good news and bad news before we get into it.

The bad news is that, due to circumstances beyond my control that I am not yet at liberty to discuss, I've been forced to scale back somewhat on the amount of words per day I put into Princess of the Void, which has impacted my schedule and my backlog. For the medium-term, updates will be twice a week instead of thrice a week, skipping Wednesdays. This will continue until I've rebuilt my backlog or the conclusion of Vol 5, whichever comes first.

The good news is that over on my Patreon I have made the first seven chapters of another project of mine, Headless over Heels, available for public reading, no account required. It's a dark fantasy romance between a hard-luck thief and a sword-swinging Murder MILF, and it's for anyone who's been waiting for me to write fantasy, dominant love interests, or in the past tense.

And then we get into it.

Of spa days and dad bods.

Quote:“We are nearly finished, ladies.” Lakxuki!a limbers up. “One more sequence and we’ll break for lunch.”

“Last chance to take a dip in the runa-fish springs, dove,” Sykora says. “They don’t let you back in after a meal.”

“All right, all right. I’ll give Jax some company.” Grant puts his book aside. He stands up and blows his wife a kiss. “See you in a few.”

He pads down the lodge’s cool, rough-hewn hallway, feeling the cool moisture of the woven seaweed floor mats. He ducks through a clattering beaded curtain into the men’s runa grotto where Ajax lounges, a clay mask smeared across his restful face. The Master Sergeant’s head is tilted back against the pool’s polished stone lip. A darting cloud of tiny cyclopean fish surrounds him. They gleam silver in the low light cast by clouds of bioluminescent moss along the cavern walls.

Ajax opens an eye as Grant comes in. “Feeling brave enough yet, Majesty?”

“Buffet time soon.” Grant undoes his robe. Beneath he’s wearing the baggy swim shorts the lodge provides, which are woven from the same aquatic stuff as the floor mats. He balked at first at how much material there was, but it feels amazing in the water, flowing around him like an extension of the gentle currents. “Gotta at least try to try, you know?”

“Sure,” Ajax says. “You wash your mask off?”

“I told the lady it was sort of burn-y and she frowned and said Perhaps let’s stick to the massage,” Grant says. “I think maybe Maekyonite skin doesn’t love Taiikari facial clay.”

“Let’s see if the runas wanna nibble you anyway.” Ajax sloshes his feet close to the water’s surface; Grant sees the one-eyed fish cluster around them.

“God. Okay.” Grant steps out of his robe. “If they eat me alive, it’s gonna harm your career.”

Ajax whistles as Grant eases into the water. “Looking solid, Majesty.”

“I’ve started lifting with the Eqtorans,” Grant says. “Envy’s a powerful motivator.”

Ajax squints his metallic yellow eyes. “You weren’t envious of me?”

“I beat your deadlift.”

“You beat my old deadlift. I've got all kinds of time right now. Gonna come back yoked.”

“Gonna come back doughy from the food, more like,” Grant says. “We’re almost at lunch, and I’m still stuffed from breakfast.”

“Shut up and get in the—”

Ajax’s voice dies as he realizes what he just said and who he just said it to.

“Uh,” he says.

Grant laughs. “You have been off the Pike too long, Master Sergeant.” He eases into the water and shivers as the fish gather around him and he feels the tiny pinpoint pressures of their sucking mouths. “God, that’s weird.”

His Prince’s uninterrupted good mood relaxes Ajax back into the water and puts a relieved grin on his face. “You’re gonna come out of this so fresh,” he says. “And it feels kinda good, right?”

“I’ll give it a few minutes.” Grant settles further in, up to his waist. “Not putting my nipples in.”

“I figure it’s solidarity,” Ajax says. “Can’t be afraid of a little suction when Meen’s gonna feed the twins.”

“Gross, Jax.”

Ajax shrugs. The fish scatter and reform.

“It’s called a dad bod, by the way,” Grant says. “On Maekyon. We watched a comedy movie a while ago that reminded me.”

“Dad bod. What’s that?”

“Putting on some sympathy pounds.”

“You won’t get me to say it again, Majesty,” Ajax says.

“But you’re thinking it.”

“I’m in a bulk phase,” Ajax says. “You’ll get to the buffet, and you’ll understand.”