Tales of the Legendary
[A Hero Sandwich Production]
Smouldering Decay: Staking a Claim (pt 6.2)
After getting back to my apartment, I deposited my clothing into the washing machine. Hopefully the dress wouldn't stain, but given my luck so far tonight I wasn't holding my breath about it. One quick shower and a big fluffy fire resistant bathrobe later, I was feeling significantly better about life in general. So this date didn't work out, I still had a large list of potentially compatible partners to look over. I could always pay Superball back for leaving me angry and wet at some later time. Revenge was best served when they weren't expecting it. At least that's what I told my self, knowing that I -really- didn't want to ask someone for help with this. Cause that would entail explaining why I wanted to track down Superball.
Granted, this was Superball, so just acting really mad and refusing to talk about what had happened would probably get me some results. But then people would get curious and talk amongst themselves, someone would probably go digging though the Legendary's security tapes and find me asking him out on a date. And then the questions would get really uncomfortable.
So it was up to my meager spying skills to track him down. Yeah, that was a waste of time, anyone who didn't take their mask off on a date to drink beer was paranoid about something. And paranoids always put far more effort that I was willing to expend hiding themselves. The alternative was to be patient, let them think the incident was forgotten about, and then blindside them when they weren't expecting it.
I could do patient, I didn't have to like it, but I could do it. Being stuck in this dimension had forced me to develop a long term outlook on life. Superball could be dealt with later, for now I took a second look at the list I had gotten back from the computer.
It was far longer than I first anticipated. Which was part of the reason I had jumped at the first name that -seemed- like a good idea. But given the disaster that turned out to be I decided to go over the list with a fine tooth comb. And hopefully this time I could prevent another occurrence of my romantic plans self-immolating. Once I sat down and started going over the profiles, or at least the parts of the profiles I had access to, I realized my first error. I had asked the computer for a list of heros that were immune to radiation and resistant to fire. And it did just that. No restrictions on gender, age, anatomical ability, or present relationship status.
I was tempted to refine my query, but refrained from doing so. Databases were not my forte, and poking around long enough to get it right would probably attract questions as to why I was doing this. I really didn't need to get asked by the legendary AI why was looking for such a specific type of person.
So I settled on pairing down the list by hand. Some of the people could be dismissed because they were listed as already in a relationship. Others because while yes, they were immune to radiation and heat, those abilities where imparted by equipment they wore. Equipment that would have to be removed in order to accomplish what I wanted out of this relationship. Still more because of their age, I wasn't going to get into a relationship with jailbait. And even a few because their profiles gave me a weird feeling. The various dog/cat/whatever-anthromorphs also got nixed. I had enough bad experiences burning my own hair. And while it did make shaving my legs a breeze, I didn't need people asking why my date was bald in -those- places, or my apartment smelling like burnt fur.
Once the first pass was done I went back over the list and made sure to read and -understand- why the computer listed them. This excluded a few regenerators from the list. I'd worked with some of them in the past, and I doubted they would willingly submit themselves to radiation poisoning and burns, especially in sensitive places. And even if they didn't feel anything, the smell of burnt flesh was always a turn-off. Also removed from the list was anyone who's immunity was from abilities that needed conscious control. Even if they could keep on top of things during the really enjoyable parts I didn't need to give them cancer as they slept.
That left 17 people, who were divided by sex into two separate lists. Five guys, excluding Superball. Out of the entire Legendary and Riot Force rosters, there were -possibly- five males who I could drag back to my apartment and expect to walk out in the morning. While Gamma my have been ready to swing both ways I wasn't quite so sure. But I kept the female half of the list, it was the majority of my compatible partners after all. Perhaps if none of the males worked out I'd have a second look at it.
Going over the shortlist again, I set my sights on Flaming Wreckage. I knew he hung around Kentucky a lot, and Kentucky always seemed like a good judge of character. I just hoped Flaming Wreckage's name wasn't prophetic of the relationships outcome.
----------
And for those of you wondering here is the list I'm working from:
Superball
Flaming Wreckage
Nameless Terror
Captain Cluebat
X-Ray Ted
Cleansing Dawn
I haven't given the female list much deep though in terms of who Decay would approach first. She will be tracking down Superball to relieve her pent up frustrations on at this point (if my muse hasn't been distracted by something shiny). But here are candidates:
Glass Lass
Impossibelle
Emi Arizona
Themaria Dist
Mira Wolf-Rayet
Kyriel the Fury
Onyx Blast
Fire Bomber
Cyberwoman 10
Falling Angel
Child of the Atom
-Terry
-----
"so listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing to happen to you today"
TF2: Spy
[A Hero Sandwich Production]
Smouldering Decay: Staking a Claim (pt 6.2)
After getting back to my apartment, I deposited my clothing into the washing machine. Hopefully the dress wouldn't stain, but given my luck so far tonight I wasn't holding my breath about it. One quick shower and a big fluffy fire resistant bathrobe later, I was feeling significantly better about life in general. So this date didn't work out, I still had a large list of potentially compatible partners to look over. I could always pay Superball back for leaving me angry and wet at some later time. Revenge was best served when they weren't expecting it. At least that's what I told my self, knowing that I -really- didn't want to ask someone for help with this. Cause that would entail explaining why I wanted to track down Superball.
Granted, this was Superball, so just acting really mad and refusing to talk about what had happened would probably get me some results. But then people would get curious and talk amongst themselves, someone would probably go digging though the Legendary's security tapes and find me asking him out on a date. And then the questions would get really uncomfortable.
So it was up to my meager spying skills to track him down. Yeah, that was a waste of time, anyone who didn't take their mask off on a date to drink beer was paranoid about something. And paranoids always put far more effort that I was willing to expend hiding themselves. The alternative was to be patient, let them think the incident was forgotten about, and then blindside them when they weren't expecting it.
I could do patient, I didn't have to like it, but I could do it. Being stuck in this dimension had forced me to develop a long term outlook on life. Superball could be dealt with later, for now I took a second look at the list I had gotten back from the computer.
It was far longer than I first anticipated. Which was part of the reason I had jumped at the first name that -seemed- like a good idea. But given the disaster that turned out to be I decided to go over the list with a fine tooth comb. And hopefully this time I could prevent another occurrence of my romantic plans self-immolating. Once I sat down and started going over the profiles, or at least the parts of the profiles I had access to, I realized my first error. I had asked the computer for a list of heros that were immune to radiation and resistant to fire. And it did just that. No restrictions on gender, age, anatomical ability, or present relationship status.
I was tempted to refine my query, but refrained from doing so. Databases were not my forte, and poking around long enough to get it right would probably attract questions as to why I was doing this. I really didn't need to get asked by the legendary AI why was looking for such a specific type of person.
So I settled on pairing down the list by hand. Some of the people could be dismissed because they were listed as already in a relationship. Others because while yes, they were immune to radiation and heat, those abilities where imparted by equipment they wore. Equipment that would have to be removed in order to accomplish what I wanted out of this relationship. Still more because of their age, I wasn't going to get into a relationship with jailbait. And even a few because their profiles gave me a weird feeling. The various dog/cat/whatever-anthromorphs also got nixed. I had enough bad experiences burning my own hair. And while it did make shaving my legs a breeze, I didn't need people asking why my date was bald in -those- places, or my apartment smelling like burnt fur.
Once the first pass was done I went back over the list and made sure to read and -understand- why the computer listed them. This excluded a few regenerators from the list. I'd worked with some of them in the past, and I doubted they would willingly submit themselves to radiation poisoning and burns, especially in sensitive places. And even if they didn't feel anything, the smell of burnt flesh was always a turn-off. Also removed from the list was anyone who's immunity was from abilities that needed conscious control. Even if they could keep on top of things during the really enjoyable parts I didn't need to give them cancer as they slept.
That left 17 people, who were divided by sex into two separate lists. Five guys, excluding Superball. Out of the entire Legendary and Riot Force rosters, there were -possibly- five males who I could drag back to my apartment and expect to walk out in the morning. While Gamma my have been ready to swing both ways I wasn't quite so sure. But I kept the female half of the list, it was the majority of my compatible partners after all. Perhaps if none of the males worked out I'd have a second look at it.
Going over the shortlist again, I set my sights on Flaming Wreckage. I knew he hung around Kentucky a lot, and Kentucky always seemed like a good judge of character. I just hoped Flaming Wreckage's name wasn't prophetic of the relationships outcome.
----------
And for those of you wondering here is the list I'm working from:
Superball
Flaming Wreckage
Nameless Terror
Captain Cluebat
X-Ray Ted
Cleansing Dawn
I haven't given the female list much deep though in terms of who Decay would approach first. She will be tracking down Superball to relieve her pent up frustrations on at this point (if my muse hasn't been distracted by something shiny). But here are candidates:
Glass Lass
Impossibelle
Emi Arizona
Themaria Dist
Mira Wolf-Rayet
Kyriel the Fury
Onyx Blast
Fire Bomber
Cyberwoman 10
Falling Angel
Child of the Atom
-Terry
-----
"so listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing to happen to you today"
TF2: Spy