The Dutch actually have a very simple solution to this problem.
The only marriage that's legally recognised is that provided by the government. You can get married in a church, you can get married before the church (authority), but unless you are married by a duly designated special officer of the state authorised to perform marriages that has no legal power and is in fact illegal. Especially if you then try to claim marriage benefits.
I expect that most clergy in the Netherlands are such officers, or if not that the couple first, quietly, signs the paperwork at townhall before going to the ceremony at church.
The only marriage that's legally recognised is that provided by the government. You can get married in a church, you can get married before the church (authority), but unless you are married by a duly designated special officer of the state authorised to perform marriages that has no legal power and is in fact illegal. Especially if you then try to claim marriage benefits.
I expect that most clergy in the Netherlands are such officers, or if not that the couple first, quietly, signs the paperwork at townhall before going to the ceremony at church.