The history of the nations in one line
03-15-2023, 03:11 PM (This post was last modified: 03-15-2023, 03:21 PM by Dartz.)
03-15-2023, 03:11 PM (This post was last modified: 03-15-2023, 03:21 PM by Dartz.)
Not sure if any of these are funny....
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British History:
So we just showed up uninvited and made the place our own for a couple of centuries. Savages didn’t even welcome us.
American History:
All men are created equal* (Terms and conditions may apply. See fine print. )
French History:
They call it a revolution. IBecause we wend up right back where we started.
German History:
Once again, Europe is at war.
Austrian History:
Did we start that?
Swiss History:
500 years of peace and brotherly love have given us - a fancy watch.
Belgian History:
Would like you to laugh it off as Germany’s bypass - pay no attention to the Ghost of King Leopold there.
Dutch History:
Never living the tulip thing down
Spanish History:
Arrives in America like the full stop at the end of a sentence.
Portuguese History
Finders Keepers
Irish History:
Right lads, we're leaving - again.
Italian History
Remember when we ruled the known world?
Greek History
Remember who ruled it before Italy?
Iranian History
Yes.
Russian History:
Take a drink when it gets worse.
Ukrainian History:
Desperately trying not to become Russian History
Polish History:
Desperately trying to remain Polish History
Balkan History:
A Tesla Fire.
Japanese History:
We're special. Nothing ever happened. Lets just keep that quiet. Lets never talk about it.....
Chinese History:
...and then millions died.
Australian History:
A thirty thousand year dream fucked by one British cunt's Endeavour
New Zealand History:
Getting annoyed when mistaken for Aussie history.
Indian History.
The difference between 25% of the world economy, and 7% is the British Empire.
Middle Eastern History:
A 3000 year stew of paternalist foreign intervention and religious fundamentalism.
Arabian History:
Camel-Camel-Camel-Car-Private Jet-America-Camel-Camel
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British History:
So we just showed up uninvited and made the place our own for a couple of centuries. Savages didn’t even welcome us.
American History:
All men are created equal* (Terms and conditions may apply. See fine print. )
French History:
They call it a revolution. IBecause we wend up right back where we started.
German History:
Once again, Europe is at war.
Austrian History:
Did we start that?
Swiss History:
500 years of peace and brotherly love have given us - a fancy watch.
Belgian History:
Would like you to laugh it off as Germany’s bypass - pay no attention to the Ghost of King Leopold there.
Dutch History:
Never living the tulip thing down
Spanish History:
Arrives in America like the full stop at the end of a sentence.
Portuguese History
Finders Keepers
Irish History:
Right lads, we're leaving - again.
Italian History
Remember when we ruled the known world?
Greek History
Remember who ruled it before Italy?
Iranian History
Yes.
Russian History:
Take a drink when it gets worse.
Ukrainian History:
Desperately trying not to become Russian History
Polish History:
Desperately trying to remain Polish History
Balkan History:
A Tesla Fire.
Japanese History:
We're special. Nothing ever happened. Lets just keep that quiet. Lets never talk about it.....
Chinese History:
...and then millions died.
Australian History:
A thirty thousand year dream fucked by one British cunt's Endeavour
New Zealand History:
Getting annoyed when mistaken for Aussie history.
Indian History.
The difference between 25% of the world economy, and 7% is the British Empire.
Middle Eastern History:
A 3000 year stew of paternalist foreign intervention and religious fundamentalism.
Arabian History:
Camel-Camel-Camel-Car-Private Jet-America-Camel-Camel
I love the smell of rotaries in the morning. You know one time, I got to work early, before the rush hour. I walked through the empty carpark, I didn't see one bloody Prius or Golf. And that smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole carpark, smelled like.... ....speed.
One day they're going to ban them.