Well, I gave it four stars. Good, but in need of some minor repairs really. Mission one seemed alright, if extremely short. In fact, given it doesn't add
anything to the arc except some Tsoo to fight, I have to wonder if it's needed.
Mission Two had a few minor spelling mistakes in the rescue dialogue of the siblings.
Mirror Guardian Naoko: Oh, thank you. We've got to hurry, they were talking to removing some books they had here.
I think that should be 'talking about removing'
Mirror Knight Hiroshi: Oh thank you. We have to hurry, my br... sister is somewhere furnter in.
Should be 'further in'
Also, the arcane bookshelf seemed a little out of place. Perhaps a desk, with the chat window text noting you find a book on it?
Mission 3 is where the little problems start to really add up. For instance, when you rescue Darren, there should really be a chat note or a dialogue box
explaining to the player that the demon has appeared, if not a clue. As it was, that mission was sparse on details.
This was a problem that continued into Mission 4, where there were no clues at all, and the dialogue could be scarce. It wasn't until after the mission I
realized that the mirror was gone and the Third Shadow wasn't actually sealed again. Also, the nav bar mission objectives just say 'Mirror Guardian
Naoko' and such. You might want to stick 'Rescue' on the start of that comment, so that it makes sense.
Mirror Guardian Naoko: Thanks, but we have to hurry the ceremony has started.
Just stick a comma after 'hurry'.
Then there's Third Shadow. You might want to check his spawn details, because the moment I did some damage, he started running away. Also, I don't
think he has any ranged attacks. My flying blaster took him apart with virtually no damage in return.
One final complaint. Copy the souvenir text out of AE and stick it in Word or something. You've got more then a few spelling errors in there, and you
REALLY need to add some paragraphs.
I know I'm sounding negative, but those flaws did grab my attention. I liked the story, and the custom enemy group was fun, and actually put me on the
defensive a few times. Giving them all proper bios was welcome. So yeah... Good arc, but it needs a little bit of repair work.
anything to the arc except some Tsoo to fight, I have to wonder if it's needed.
Mission Two had a few minor spelling mistakes in the rescue dialogue of the siblings.
Mirror Guardian Naoko: Oh, thank you. We've got to hurry, they were talking to removing some books they had here.
I think that should be 'talking about removing'
Mirror Knight Hiroshi: Oh thank you. We have to hurry, my br... sister is somewhere furnter in.
Should be 'further in'
Also, the arcane bookshelf seemed a little out of place. Perhaps a desk, with the chat window text noting you find a book on it?
Mission 3 is where the little problems start to really add up. For instance, when you rescue Darren, there should really be a chat note or a dialogue box
explaining to the player that the demon has appeared, if not a clue. As it was, that mission was sparse on details.
This was a problem that continued into Mission 4, where there were no clues at all, and the dialogue could be scarce. It wasn't until after the mission I
realized that the mirror was gone and the Third Shadow wasn't actually sealed again. Also, the nav bar mission objectives just say 'Mirror Guardian
Naoko' and such. You might want to stick 'Rescue' on the start of that comment, so that it makes sense.
Mirror Guardian Naoko: Thanks, but we have to hurry the ceremony has started.
Just stick a comma after 'hurry'.
Then there's Third Shadow. You might want to check his spawn details, because the moment I did some damage, he started running away. Also, I don't
think he has any ranged attacks. My flying blaster took him apart with virtually no damage in return.
One final complaint. Copy the souvenir text out of AE and stick it in Word or something. You've got more then a few spelling errors in there, and you
REALLY need to add some paragraphs.
I know I'm sounding negative, but those flaws did grab my attention. I liked the story, and the custom enemy group was fun, and actually put me on the
defensive a few times. Giving them all proper bios was welcome. So yeah... Good arc, but it needs a little bit of repair work.