Very nice! I don't know if I missed it the first time or it's new, but you do have "Cloud pat her on the back" still to fix. Otherwise, though, it's hitting all the technical standards checkboxes, and the rewrite still meshes with the rest of what's already written, so (for what it's worth) you can slap my QA stamp on 'er and ship it 
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows