Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
September 7th, 2016
6:54pm
Ottawa. Capital of Canada and home of one end of a UNESCO World Heritage Site. "A big city with a small-town feel," as one of the local radio stations put it. One of the claimants of the name "Silicon Valley North." Home town of A Tribe Called Red, Amos the Transparent, the Five Man Electrical Band, MonkeyJunk, and The Reverb Syndicate, to name a few, but still a city with a stereotype of rolling up the sidewalks after six o'clock. A city with enough restaurants that, if you can afford it, you can try a different country's cuisine every night a month without repeating a country.
Compared to all that, being the place where Rob Donaldson grew up doesn't seem to matter... until you realize that it was his knowledge of the city that let him see the first sign something odd was going on.
"I thought they tore this place down years ago." Rob was looking at a small apartment building, only a dozen units, surrounded by rows of townhouses that Rob was sure had also existed where the building was standing. "There's no way we can make a place this size break even."
"It won't be forever," his companion replied. "And you can get government subsidies to help, I'm sure."
Rob bit his lower lip, then shook his head. "That money dried up years ago."
"You can get government subsidies to help. I'm sure."
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
September 9th, 2016
8:03am
Yesterday, Rob had a cheque in his hand - enough money to buy the building outright, pay the utility bills and property taxes for a year, and buy new appliances for the apartments. He had proof that the Canada Mortgage and Housing Corporation did not work that way or that quickly... but there it was.
Now, he didn't have the cheque but he did have the deed to the apartment building, and the appliances were being delivered the day after they had been ordered. He was sure that city hall and large-appliance stores did not work that quickly... but there it was, and there they were.
The deed was in the name of a numbered corporation that didn't exist two days before (and wasn't owned by Rob). Simply visiting a lawyer should not have been sufficient to make that happen, and definitely not that fast... but there it was.
Rob turned to his companion. "Okay, it's happening. I suppose I have you to thank for that." After a pause with no reply, Rob continued, "But this is only four impossible things. Give me two more to believe, and then I can have breakfast."
"Lewis Carrol."
"The books are eminently quotable."
His companion nodded. "Quotable, or referenceable. Here is a fifth 'impossible thing.'" He handed Rob a box. "Cellphones with built-in text recognition and translation. Not quite real-time, but close."
Rob opened the box and took one of the phones out. It was lightweight and stylish, assuming your style tended toward white with red trim. He noticed a maker's mark where he expected to see a brand name - a mallet-style hammer inside a circle.
Rob blinked. It was still there.
"Okay, I've read Bob Schroeck's stories. Either this is a joke, or ... No, that's the impossible thing here. These were made by somebody who I thought was a fictional character."
"You're quick on the uptake for somebody who hasn't had breakfast yet. The white ones," he gestured to the phone in Rob's hand, "recognize English and display Japanese. The black one works in the opposite direction. And they all have Blackberry-level encryption." He handed Rob a USB memory stick. "And this contains VPN client software and URLs for a private chat room where you can discuss matters of interest with other people in your situation."
"Japanese? French would have been more useful."
"For you, perhaps. But not for the people we expect to arrive any minute now."
Rob sighed and looked off into the heavens. "When something seems too good to be true, it probably is. I assume these people aren't showing up on a bus."
There was no reply. Rob looked around - only to discover he was alone.
He sighed again, longer and deeper. "Maybe I should get breakfast now anyway. I just know the sixth impossible thing involves filling this building with transfictional people. The setup's too obvious." After a beat, he added, "And I just lampshaded that. All The Tropes has ruined my life."
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."
- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012
September 7th, 2016
6:54pm
Ottawa. Capital of Canada and home of one end of a UNESCO World Heritage Site. "A big city with a small-town feel," as one of the local radio stations put it. One of the claimants of the name "Silicon Valley North." Home town of A Tribe Called Red, Amos the Transparent, the Five Man Electrical Band, MonkeyJunk, and The Reverb Syndicate, to name a few, but still a city with a stereotype of rolling up the sidewalks after six o'clock. A city with enough restaurants that, if you can afford it, you can try a different country's cuisine every night a month without repeating a country.
Compared to all that, being the place where Rob Donaldson grew up doesn't seem to matter... until you realize that it was his knowledge of the city that let him see the first sign something odd was going on.
"I thought they tore this place down years ago." Rob was looking at a small apartment building, only a dozen units, surrounded by rows of townhouses that Rob was sure had also existed where the building was standing. "There's no way we can make a place this size break even."
"It won't be forever," his companion replied. "And you can get government subsidies to help, I'm sure."
Rob bit his lower lip, then shook his head. "That money dried up years ago."
"You can get government subsidies to help. I'm sure."
Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
September 9th, 2016
8:03am
Yesterday, Rob had a cheque in his hand - enough money to buy the building outright, pay the utility bills and property taxes for a year, and buy new appliances for the apartments. He had proof that the Canada Mortgage and Housing Corporation did not work that way or that quickly... but there it was.
Now, he didn't have the cheque but he did have the deed to the apartment building, and the appliances were being delivered the day after they had been ordered. He was sure that city hall and large-appliance stores did not work that quickly... but there it was, and there they were.
The deed was in the name of a numbered corporation that didn't exist two days before (and wasn't owned by Rob). Simply visiting a lawyer should not have been sufficient to make that happen, and definitely not that fast... but there it was.
Rob turned to his companion. "Okay, it's happening. I suppose I have you to thank for that." After a pause with no reply, Rob continued, "But this is only four impossible things. Give me two more to believe, and then I can have breakfast."
"Lewis Carrol."
"The books are eminently quotable."
His companion nodded. "Quotable, or referenceable. Here is a fifth 'impossible thing.'" He handed Rob a box. "Cellphones with built-in text recognition and translation. Not quite real-time, but close."
Rob opened the box and took one of the phones out. It was lightweight and stylish, assuming your style tended toward white with red trim. He noticed a maker's mark where he expected to see a brand name - a mallet-style hammer inside a circle.
Rob blinked. It was still there.
"Okay, I've read Bob Schroeck's stories. Either this is a joke, or ... No, that's the impossible thing here. These were made by somebody who I thought was a fictional character."
"You're quick on the uptake for somebody who hasn't had breakfast yet. The white ones," he gestured to the phone in Rob's hand, "recognize English and display Japanese. The black one works in the opposite direction. And they all have Blackberry-level encryption." He handed Rob a USB memory stick. "And this contains VPN client software and URLs for a private chat room where you can discuss matters of interest with other people in your situation."
"Japanese? French would have been more useful."
"For you, perhaps. But not for the people we expect to arrive any minute now."
Rob sighed and looked off into the heavens. "When something seems too good to be true, it probably is. I assume these people aren't showing up on a bus."
There was no reply. Rob looked around - only to discover he was alone.
He sighed again, longer and deeper. "Maybe I should get breakfast now anyway. I just know the sixth impossible thing involves filling this building with transfictional people. The setup's too obvious." After a beat, he added, "And I just lampshaded that. All The Tropes has ruined my life."
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."
- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012