Teaser #2 For Chapter Three

[Bob Schroeck]

If all the stress keeping me off my emotional balance weren't bad enough, I had the unfortunate privilege, late that Thursday morning, of getting caught between Chris' two ... well, I never did get a good idea what to call them. "Girlfriends" wasn't *quite* the right word. "Paramours" implies more intimacy than their body language and verbal denials allowed for. "Steady dates" sounds too high-schoolish. "Harem" would have gotten me killed. Very slowly. "Bookends" might have been the most accurate -- they seemed to automatically gravitate to the opposite sides of everything, both physically and metaphorically. Whatever. All I know is that they were hooked up with him through a combination of honest attraction and divine fuck-up that could have had me laughing for even longer than the story of Chris' apotheosis did, if it weren't so twisted. As a result, Police Girl and Buffy Coed -- Ami and Rachel -- seemed destined to oppose and orbit each other as well as Chris.I didn't learn that right away. Oh, no. I had to make a mistake first. I had to *ask* them about it.It was almost lunchtime the day after the angel-related unpleasantness. I was still keeping myself more or less separate from the rest of the house's inhabitants, if only to spare them (and me) the effects of my still-hair-trigger temper. That meant I'd taken over the temple building proper as my personal domain again.I'd seen Megumi to the gate earlier, and not long after that watched from a distance as Skuld headed off toward the NIT campus by herself. Chris apparently had no morning classes on Thursdays, though, and I had not yet seen him by the time I ensconced myself in my temporary retreat for the morning. I spent several hours performing kata -- empty-handed, at first, to warm up, and then once I was limber and ready, while wielding a bokken. During the latter, I did my best to integrate what Chris had been showing me into a coherent whole. The fact that he had begun by working me in a single style to begin with helped me a great deal. I found, however, that I missed making up my own names for the stances, positions and moves. Somehow terms like "hasso hidari gamae", "chudan-no-kame" and "jodan-no-kame morote uchi kiri otashi kudashi", as descriptive as they were in Japanese, seemed far less interesting to me than coming up with something of my own like "Strike of the Wild Mallard" or "The Scarlet Pumpernickel Parry".Dull or not, though, I worked on those new moves all morning, both singly and in combinations. I concentrated on burning them deep into muscle memory, to make them as automatic as my unarmed combat moves have become. It wouldn't happen all in one morning, not by a long shot, but the key to the process was repetition. And the sooner you start, the sooner it's accomplished. I only stopped when Chris's bookends showed up and I realized that I was hungry.I heard them before I saw them, but then again, most of the neighborhood could probably have said the same. They were engaged in a calm and dignified discussion of important issues of the day. No, wait, that was somebody else. *These* two were all but screaming at each other at the tops of their lungs just outside the gates to the complex, which did nothing to mitigate their volume that I could detect. Even so, I had no idea what they were actually arguing about. Long before they'd gotten within earshot the two of them had already devolved into sniping at each other. The rather shrill exchange jolted me out of the state of intense focus into which I'd slipped, and reminded me that it was close to lunch time. As I started to debate with myself over how comfortable it would be for me to eat with the "family", I slid the bokken I was using into my belt and grabbed the towel I'dbrought in with me. I didn't really need it, but I wiped downmy brow anyway and then draped it around my shoulders.The two girls were just entering the compound when I stepped out of the temple. I was the only person in the yard at that moment other than them, and I watched as they crossed the flagstones so absorbed in their argument that they were completely unaware of my presence. From what I overheard, they were bickering about which of them was the better match for Chris, and it was already rapidly degenerating into the "so there!" and "I know you are but what am *I*?" level of debate. They weren't more than halfway across when I grimaced at the irritating stridency of their voices and decided that I'd had more than I could take. Taking advantage of their inattention, I blended speed and stealth to slip up behind them unnoticed. Staying just out of arm's reach I asked, very loudly and obnoxiously, "Just what the *hell* is it with you two?"
-- Bob
---------
...The President is on the line
As ninety-nine crab rangoons go by...

[robkelk]

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They were engaged in a calm and dignified discussion of important issues of the day.
No, wait, that was somebody else. *These* two were all but screaming at each other at the tops of their lungs.

---

That's going into a sigfile (with proper attribution, of course)...

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Staying just out of arm's reach I asked, very loudly and obnoxiously, "Just what the *hell* is it with you two?"

---

Oh, dear - didn't Paradox hope that that would never happen?

-Rob Kelk
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

[DHBirr]

And when last seen, these two were already inclined to be hostile to Doug, on account of his fight with Paradox....
"Angel-related unpleasantness"? Oh, no; not another quarrel with the deities. Just when things were getting friendly, too....
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.

[Jenova Silverstar]

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As a result,
Police Girl and Buffy Coed -- Ami and Rachel -- seemed destined
to oppose and orbit each other as well as Chris.

---

Amusing mental image at this line: Doug acting like Alucard and actually calling them Police Girl and Buffy Coed.

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They were engaged in a calm and dignified discussion of important issues of the day.
No, wait, that was somebody else. *These* two were all but screaming at each other at the tops of their lungs.

---

*lol*
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."
--Dr. Seuss

[jpub]

Sometimes, Bob hits on a set of lines that are comedic gold. Those were one such set.--
Christopher Angel, aka JPublic
The Works of Christopher Angel
"Camaraderie, adventure, and steel on steel. The stuff of legend! Right, Boo?"

[Star Ranger4]

---

Staying just out of arm's reach I asked, very loudly and obnoxiously, "Just what the *hell* is it with you two?"

---

Oh gods.... Doug, you just pulled the pin and mr. Grenade is no longer your friend..."I was an Otaku before those kids came along and changed the meaning of the word."
-- HM "Howling Mad" Wilson to more than one team-mate.
Hear that thunder rolling till it seems to split the sky?
That's every ship in Grayson's Navy taking up the cry-
NO QUARTER!!!
-- "No Quarter", by Echo's Children

[Bob Schroeck]

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Sometimes, Bob hits on a set of lines that are comedic gold. Those were one such set.

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To be absolutely honest, the structure (but not the content) for that bit was lifted from a similar line in chapter 8 of Rob "Kenko" Haynie's Girl Days:

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The walk back was uneventful.
No, sorry, that was a different walk back. THIS walk back was something other than uneventful.

---

-- Bob
---------
...The President is on the line
As ninety-nine crab rangoons go by...

[Bob Schroeck]

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Amusing mental image at this line: Doug acting like Alucard and actually calling them Police Girl and Buffy Coed.

---

Get him the red duster and hat, and he'll give it a try.
-- Bob
---------
...The President is on the line
As ninety-nine crab rangoons go by...

[Cobalt Greywalker]

---

Get him the red duster and hat, and he'll give it a try.

---

Doug better hope he doesn't end up in that universe.
As for the 'Chris-ettes', if they're getting on that well...
Interesting to note that Paradox is helping Doug train. I wonder what caused it.
(And I forsee a scene in the epilogue (all that way in the future, yes) where Chris is bringing his stuff back from Asgard when his curiosity gets the better of him and he looks up Doug in his GURPS book, then shows it to his sisters.
That is, unless the deities have already found out about Hex by this point.)

[Herr Bad Moon]

Somebody must have hit Doug with a debuff to his WIS, because really? He should know better ---------------
-Jon
Being the Mariner hitting coach is like being the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts.
-Poster on USSMariner.com
---
Jon
"And that must have caused my dad's brain to break in half, replaced by a purely mechanical engine of revenge!"

[Bob Schroeck]

No Wisdom stat in V&V, hence... no wisdom.

-- Bob
---------
...The President is on the line
As ninety-nine crab rangoons go by...

[Feinan]

*snickers*
*puts on a bad Russian accent* Goof gas affects the brain...
*bad FEMALE Russian voice* And?
*Bad Russian accent again* No brain, no effect!

[Ebony]

Is not Russian accent, silly man. Is Pottsylvanian accent!
For such an insult to Pottsylvanian national character, you will receive punishment most harsh. But first, we must GET MOOSE AND SQUIRREL!Ebony the Black Dragon
Senior Editor, Living Room Games
http://www.lrgames.com
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com

"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."