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It's The Dude
It's The Dude
#1
Quote:
I saw it originally as generating a rather lethal simulacrum that matched the song but was nobody "real", but maybe after the Walk, it'll pull up someone he met...
Well, that answered a question I'd been planning to ask ... for some time now, I've been thinking that there ought to be a simulacrum generated by the song "The Dude" (written by Quincy Jones, Rod Temperton, and Patti Austin; lead vocal by James Ingram; copyright 1981 Yellow Brick Road(ASCAP); duration 5 minutes 35 seconds). But I didn't know if Doug knew anybody it'd match -- knew him well enough to create a simulacrum.
Whoever it is, he'd possibly be a martial artist; definitely streetwise. Charms most women and either intimidates or awes most men. Perhaps a touch unscrupulous, at least in monetary dealings, but presumably Doug wouldn't be interested in calling up a simulacrum of an out-and-out criminal, drug dealer, etc. (unless he's in a super bad mood and wants somebody he can beat to death without guilt).
Lyrics:
Who is it
That walks the street with all the action?
(It's The Dude.)
Who is it
That always gets a hot reaction?
(That's The Dude.)
Don'tcha' go makin' no mojo moves
'Round The Dude.
(Don't try no funny business.)
Don'tcha' be coppin' no attitude
With The Dude.
(Hey, hey, here comes The Dude.)
Spoken: Hey everybody in the neighborhood,
The beauty's on duty, better hear me good.
Sister E-flat tomato, Brother B-flat balloon,
Somethin' funky's goin' down, better listen to my tune.
I graduated from the college of the street.
I got a Ph.D. in how to make ends meet.
Inflation in the nation don't bother me,
'Cause I'm a scholar with a dollar
You can plainly see.

He's a winner 'cause it's in his blood.
Ain't nobody who's out there like him.
Any corner in the neighborhood,
That's the place that you'll always find him.
Soft talkin' with a rap so sweet,
(He does it good.)
Ladies call him the Candy Rapper.
(They want his love.)
He's the only one that's really cool
(He's really cool.)
That's the reason why he's The Dude.
Who is it
That ain't got time for foolish talkin'?
(It's The Dude.)
Who is it
That looks so clean you can't ignore him?
(That's The Dude.)
Don'tcha' go mess with
His walkin' stick -- not The Dude.
(Don't try no funny business.)
Don't you double-cross him
He's super slick -- He's The Dude.
(Hey, hey, here comes The Dude.)
Spoken: I'm a stone cold taker,
I'm a piggy bank shaker,
An' I don't waste my time talkin' trash.
So if you go to my school,
You gotta learn this rule --
Don't let your mouth write a check
That your body can't cash.
If you never had it,
Don't pay it no mind.
I know you're gonna get it,
If you take a little time.
Take a piece from the East,
A piece from the West,
Put it where it feels good --
Let The Dude do the rest.

See him steppin' down the street
No forgettin', he's The Dude.
See him steppin' down the street
No forgettin', he's The Dude.
Don'tcha' go makin' no mojo moves
'Round The Dude.
(Don't try no funny business.)
Don'tcha' be coppin' no attitude
With The Dude.
(Hey, hey, here comes The Dude.)
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.
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Re: It's The Dude
#2
If he didn't already have his own song, I'd say it summoned Shaft.Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines...

My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Atom Bomb of Courteous Debate. Get yours.

I've been writing a bit.
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Re: It's The Dude
#3
Maybe it summons Nabeshin.

-- Bob
---------
The Internet Is For Norns.
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Re: It's The Dude
#4
Summons $Random_Dude simulacrum?
actually.. that works. There's a dearth of descriptives in the lyrics, the Dude could be damn near any dude.
Samuel L. Jackson.
Bruce Willis.
Jackie Chan (evil jackie chan?)
so on, so on.
Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979Wire Geek - Burning the weak and trampling the dead since 1979
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Re: It's The Dude
#5
I see two possible situations for use of this. I hadn't thought them through properly when I posted it.
1. Doug needs a reinforcement for close combat, and wants to avoid visible use of metagifts. So he summons The Dude, who appears in what seems to be a natural way, running out of an alley or something. "I gotcher back, man!" Considering how imposing The Dude appears, just seeing him on Doug's side may be enough to make some adversaries back off.
2. Doug is somewhere that he decidedly doesn't fit in -- racio-ethnically, socio-economically, whatever -- and the locals are inclined to get hostile about it. He calls up The Dude, whom they perceive as "one of us," to vouch for him. The locals don't see The Dude as a specific person they know -- it's not like that hysterical bit in DWV about "little Yuriko from Marketing" -- but he's obviously a local (his appearance is potentially different every time the song plays) and somebody to be reckoned with, so if he says Doug is OK, the locals back off. Their reaction lasts even after the song is over (unless it shuts off in a way that just makes The Dude vanish into thin air), so they won't give Looney any crap unless he does something stupid. Should I say, "Again"?
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.
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Re: It's The Dude
#6
Quote:
Maybe it summons Nabeshin.
"Thinks he's so hot just 'cause he's got an Afro..." Yao, in Miami Guns #1 (About a different character, but still...)
Mind you, if it's Nabeshin from Nerima Daikon Brothers, then Doug could borrow something he really needs... after he asks for it by singing.

-Rob Kelk
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012
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Re: It's The Dude
#7
I thoughtit was the self inserted director from the Excel Saga Anime.... The freak can use his afro to go Super Afro (Golden space monkey Super) and has an arsonal in his afro.
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Re: It's The Dude
#8
The character in Excel Saga and Nerima Daikon Brothers (and a cameo in the eX-Driver movie bonus video) are all Nabeshin, yes...

-Rob Kelk
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012
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Re: It's The Dude
#9
Quote:
freak can use his afro to go Super Afro (Golden space monkey Super) and has an arsonal in his afro.
Doug will tell you -- just as many military folks will -- that when you're on the ground, there's nothing like hair support to improve the situation.

-- Bob
---------
The Internet Is For Norns.
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Re: It's The Dude
#10
Quote:
Summons $Random_Dude simulacrum?
Bah, I say. It doesn't summon some random dude. It summons The Dude!!!Ebony the Black Dragon
Senior Editor, Living Room Games
http://www.lrgames.com
Ebony the Black Dragon
http://ebony14.livejournal.com

"Good night, and may the Good Lord take a Viking to you."
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Re: It's The Dude
#11
And as a potential backfire...it summons Keanu Reeves or an impersonator, who just stands there uselessly going 'Dude!'. Well, maybe not *totally* uselessly--it could serve as a meat-shield for the duration of the song.. ;-)
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Re: It's The Dude
#12
Or, depending on what movies he's seen and games he's played, it could summon Duke Nukem, Han Solo, The Terminator, Rambo, ... Really, any of a number of Action heroes.
Sylvester Stallone
Rocky Balboa
Mace Windu
Kyle Katarn (or, really, any random Jedi)
Batman (random version, there's soo many of them)
The Rock (he does act you know, and seems to fit in when not being mobbed by Fangirls)
The previously mentioned Bruce Willis, Jackie Chan, Bruce Lee.
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Re: It's The Dude
#13
Come on, now.
If it's going to summon any action hero, we all know who it's going to be.
I mean, think about it.
You have two choices.
Clint Eastwood.
And ....
John Wayne.
QED.--
"I give you the beautiful... the talented... the tirelessly atomic-powered...
R!
DOROTHY!
WAYNERIGHT!

--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.
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