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Ignorance
Ignorance
#1
"Well now! Your problem isn't so terrible after all!" Soun declared, turning Ranma by the shoulder so that they were looking at the three sisters. "Look! My eldest daughter, Kasumi! She's nineteen." She also looked shell-shocked, particularly compared to the impassive look on the next sister's face. "My second daughter, Nabiki. She's seventeen. And my third daughter, Akane. She's sixteen." Akane, if anything, looked terrified by Ranma. "Pick anyone you want," Soun instructed. "She'll be your fiancee."
"It's settled then," Kasumi said instantly, holding her youngest sister's shoulders. "It's Akane."
"Yes, they're made for each other," Nabiki agreed.
"This isn't funny!" Akane protested, glaring at Nabiki. "Why does it have to be me?"
"You hate boys, right?" Nabiki asked her.
"That's right!" Kasumi continued. "How fortunate that Ranma is half-girl!"
"No way!" Akane exclaimed. "Don't expect me to marry that hentai!"
Ranma gave her a perplexed look, then examined the faces of everyone in the room quickly. It was Soun that the young martial artist turned to for answers. "What in the world are you all talking about?" she asked. "What is a fiancee? What is this marry thing that your daughters want Akane to do? And who and what is this hentai she is talking about?"
"You're the hentai!" Akane shouted, then paused and joined her sisters in giving Ranma an astonished look.
"Eh?" Ranma said and blinked. "I am a hentai?" She frowned. "But what does that mean?"
Soun gave Genma a confused look and then patted Ranma on the shoulder. "Er, your fiancee is the person that you will marry," he explained carefully.
"Then why is Akane supposed to marry?" Ranma enquired. "If I am to have a fiancee then would I not be the person who marries?"
Kasumi opened and closed her mouth helplessly but Nabiki gave Ranma an accusing stare. "You expect us to believe that you don't know what marriage is? Weren't your parents married?"
"Of course we are!" Genma shouted indignantly.
"Parents?" Three guesses who asked that.
"Your mother and father!" Nabiki snapped. "You can't possibly be that stupid."
Ranma spread her hands helplessly. "I know what a father is," she said hesitantly. "Him over there. But what is a mother?"
"The woman he's married to..." Nabiki said and then tailed off at the blank look in Ranma's eyes. "Oh don't try to tell me that you don't know what I'm talking about."
"But I don't!" Ranma shouted, a flare of anger in her blue eyes. "What is a parent that my father is one and some woman is my mother - whatever you mean by that!? You know nothing about martial arts compared to me, why should I know all this stuff just because you do!"
Soun gupled and backed off from Ranma, who was practically glowing with anger. "Er, ah, Saotome, I think that this really is a father's responsibility..."
"WHAT ARE YOU HIDING FROM ME, OLD MAN!" Ranma shrieked, her voice reaching a distinctly unpleasant pitch.
"Marriage," Nabiki said, her voice laced with sarcasm, "is 'the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law'."
There was a long pause and then Ranma shook her head. "Okay, that raises more questions than I had. First, 'marriage' is something to do with 'marry'?"
"To marry is to enter into a marriage," Kasumi said softly. "How can you possibly not know this?"
"And how would you expect me to learn this?" Ranma asked. "I don't go out of my way to learn esoteric information, you know?"
"There's nothing esoteric about it," Kasumi protested. "Your parents were married, your father said so."
"Yes, yes. So there was some 'consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law' between Pops and some woman - this mother person I apparently have or had. So what? I only know what half those words mean, how can it have anything to do with me?"
"How can you not even know who your mother is?" Nabiki asked. "How can you not even care?" She could see tears trickling down her father's face as he remembered her mother. "She was the most important person in the world to you. She carried you for nine months and you say she has nothing to do with you!?"
"Pops carried me around until I could walk - and he's a useless fat lump!"
"Not like that," Akane corrected him. "Nabiki means your mother carried you inside her, before you were born." She shook her head at Ranma's blank look. "Kami! Where do you think babies come from?"
Ranma blinked. "Er... I dunno. Never thought about it."
"What did you think about?" Nabiki asked, a bitter edge in her voice. "Assuming that you ever have."
"That ain't such a nice thing to say," Ranma noted. "I think plenty. You think I could get so good at the Art if I didn't?"
"WhatEVER," Nabiki snorted. "Any more questions?"
"Consensual? Contractual? Hentai?" Ranma suggested, pronouncing each carefully.
"Consensual means that everyone agrees to something. Contractual means legally binding. Hentai," Kasumi explained, with a slight blush, "means abnormal or improper. It can also mean transformed," she added quickly, knowing full well that Akane had not meant it in that way. "But it's probably best not to describe yourself that way, Ranma. It, er, often means... when I say improper I mean, oh dear..."
"Sexually improper," Nabiki smirked.
"Sexually?" Ranma asked innocently.
Akane gawped. "You... don't know that either?" she asked weakly.
Ranma's gaze was withering. "Nope. And if consensual means what your sister said then we can't get married. 'Cause we'd both have to agree to it and you don't. I don't see what the big deal is but since it's not happening, I guess I don't care."
You must marry Akane! Genma declared. This is a matter of family honour!
How? Ranma asked. What does family honour have to do with marriage?
There was a stunned silence.
Because of oath that Saotome and I took to join the schools, Soun explained carefully. This is an agreement between our families and for either of you to refuse would stain the honour of both families.
Ranma frowned. Thats not my fault, he said reasonably. Akane has two sisters. Although if theyre trying to make her marry me and she doesnt want to, then its them who are rejecting the agreement. I dont have anything to do with that. Since its a matter of family honour and its members of your family that are objecting, that makes getting one of them to agree your problem.
And youll marry whoever agrees? Nabiki said sarcastically. No further objections?
It doesnt seem like such a big deal, Ranma said frankly. We do this marriage thing, then I can get back to my life and you can get on with yours. Honour is satisfied and we dont have to look at each other anymore. Frankly, I dont want to have any more to do with any of you than I absolutely have to.
Akane tried to break the table over Ranmas head and then dropped it as Ranma casually vanished, only to reappear on top of it, his added weight making it too heavy for her to continue holding. Nabikis face was pale with anger and the slightest expression of dismay had crossed Kasumis face. He turned to look at the two fathers and recoiled as he saw Souns head, vastly inflated and breathing smoke and flames.
HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY FAMILY! the Tendo patriarch bellowed.
"Whaddaya mean, 'insult'?" Ranma exclaimed. "I ain't said anything bad about you, just that I don't wanna be around ya? And you actin' like this is why! You're all nuts!"

"Ranma," Nabiki said with a serpentine smile. "I'd like to introduce you to someone that you haven't meet in a long while." She nodded towards the woman sitting at the table whose face was lightening up as the girl spoke. "This is Nodoka Saotome. Your mother."
Ranma looked at his mother and frowned. "Oh. Hello." He hesitated and then added, with patently false sincerity, "Pleased to meet you." Then he continued on his way across the room.
Nodoka's face frozen and she stared at Ranma with horrified fascination. "Ranma?"
He paused and hummed enquiringly. When she said nothing, he turned his head to look at her again. "Was there something?"
"I'm your mother!" she exclaimed. "Is that really all the greeting that you have for me?"
The boy considered that for a moment and then shrugged. "Eh. What would you suggest?"
"How about a hug?" Nabiki suggested quietly.
"I think that that would be rather unseemly," Ranma said in a disapproving voice. "We've hardly met and there's no reason to presume that sort of closeness."
Nodoka fainted.
"how could you?" Nabiki whispered, staring down at the fallen woman, then looking at Ranma, who was directing a somewhat perplexed expression at Nodoka. "How can you treat your own mother like that! You're a monster!"
Ranma froze... and then with a careful precision that was light years from his usual easy grace, stalked out of the room.
Kasumi chose that minute to walk through from the kitchen, just too late to see Ranma. "Oh my," she exclaimed, looking at Nodoka and at Nabiki, who was trembling with anger. "Whatever happened?"D for Drakensis
"An ugly macho guy can never beat an intelligent, slender, popular, and handsome hero."
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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Re: Ignorance
#2
That's... really special.
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Re: Ignorance
#3
Thanks... I think.D for Drakensis
"An ugly macho guy can never beat an intelligent, slender, popular, and handsome hero."
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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Re: Ignorance
#4
Let' see....
Take Ranma's cluelessness to it's logical conclusion..seeing it was Genma who raised him.
I would had thought the Tendo sisters would be overjoyed. One of them marries and he gets on with his life and they with theirs. Besides, they can always divorce after a suitable time frame.
Blame it on Genma, if anything else. ^^
__________________
Into terror!,  Into valour!
Charge ahead! No! Never turn
Yes, it's into the fire we fly
And the devil will burn!
- Scarlett Pimpernell
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Re: Ignorance
#5
Hey, I loved it. Great gag, well written, and Ranma's lines are just gold. =)
-- Acyl
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Re: Ignorance
#6
Nodoka groaned and ran one hand across her face. What a terrible nightmare she'd had. However traumatic it might be for her dreams to feature the terrible consequences should Genma fail in their goals for Ranma, never before had even her worst nightmares suggested that Ranma might have turned out so...
Words failed her. Filial piety was the bedrock upon which families were built. Whatever western beliefs might have seeped into society of late, she knew that the only the strictest bonds could carry a family from generation to generation into the future. Just as parents were honoured for the sacrifices they made for their children, children demonstrated their virtue by submitting to those older and wiser than they, learning virtue in so doing.
The idea that Ranma could be so completely cut off from her as to not even acknowledge her in more than the perfunctory of fashions...
No. She shook her head. The idea was absurd. She might not have seen her son in ten years, but Genma would never have allowed her son to grow up without a healthy respect for her. The idea -
She opened her eyes to see Kasumi looking down at her with a concerned expression.
- was not a nightmare. Well, it was, but not in the sense of a phantasm conjured by her sleeping mind.
Tears began to roll down her cheeks.
"Mrs. Saotome?" Kasumi asked gently. "Are you -" She broke off. Not even she could go through the empty formula of asking a mother if she was 'alright' after her only child had rejected her so utterly.
"How?" Nodoka whispered.
"Ranma?" asked another voice.
Nodoka looked sideways to see Nabiki knelt on the opposite side from Kasumi. "How could he - ?" she asked, unable to even complete the question.
Nabiki grimaced. "I don't know." She looked torn, before grudgingly admitting: "I honestly don't think it's malice. He just... He probably didn't know you'd be hurt... doesn't understand why you are."
"He didn't know that he had a mother," Kasumi said gently.
Nodoka's eyes went wide. "But -"
"Kami!" Nabiki snorted. "The way he acted, he didn't even know or care what a mother was. He might as well have never heard the word before."D for Drakensis
"An ugly macho guy can never beat an intelligent, slender, popular, and handsome hero."
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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Re: Ignorance
#7
...Okay, it has to be asked.
How the flaming smurf did Genma manage this?! It seems beyond even his capabilities to have raised the kid in such complete and absolute ignorance. Surely he'd have picked some of this up just from observing the world and society around him?
And when are people going to start laying blame where it's due, for crying out loud? (Okay, it's Ranma 1/2 so that never happens, but this is ridiculous. [Image: smile.gif] )
--Sam
"Gravity is a harsh mistress."
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Re: Ignorance
#8
Flashback to Ranma's first day at Furinkan High
"Akane will be fine," Nabiki called down from the classroom window. "This happens every day!"
Ranma shook his head. "This early in the morning?" he muttered. "At least at the last school they'd wait until lunch so there was something to fight over." He looked down and saw that Akane had already polished off her attackers. "And none of them are any challenge, even for her - this school sucks."
"Honestly!" Akane declared. "Every single morning! I'm getting tired of it." No sooner had she spoken than a projectile came flying at her.
Ranma raised an eyebrow as he saw her pluck it out of the air. A rose. Interesting choice of weapon, might mean that the guy throwing it had a decent move from the speed it had moved at - but his aim must have been off, because that would have gone right past her face if she hadn't caught it.
The guy who stepped out from under the tree looked more like a kendoist through - wearing dogi and hakama, carrying a bokuto like he knew how to use it. Pah. Boring. Still, maybe he'd have some talent. There had to be something around here that was worth Ranma's time.
"...such a boorish lot," the boy was saying (Ranma had tuned out the prefight monologue in favour of looking him over for any signs of actual skill). "Evidently each of them thought to date with you... on the dawn of the day they finally defeated you, that is. They should learn their limitations."
Akane backed up a few paces and started to work her way around the boy, only for him to bring his 'blade' around. "Well then, Akane Tendo. Will you spar with me?"
Ranma tugged at his ear. 'Date with her' - odd phrase. Generally he'd ignore it - perhaps defeating the girl would be so noteworthy that the victor would want to record the event somehow? - but there had been many words yesterday that he would have ignored if they hadn't seemed to relate to him. Possibly he should pay more attention to them.
"Hey, Akane," he said, hopping down from the wall. "Is this 'date with' business anything I should be worried about?"
"Get out of the way," she hissed. "You'll get hurt."
The challenger's eyes narrowed dangerously. "You there!" he snapped, pointing at Ranma with his bokuto. "Aren't you being awfully familiar with Akane?"
Ranma blinked. "Whaddaya mean? I'm just askin' a question. You asked her a question yourself so what's your problem?"
The boy stepped forward with what Ranma was pretty sure was anger visible on his face. "Enough of your insolence! I demand to know who you are!"
"I'm -"
"Is it not the custom," the young man interrupted, "to give one's own name first?"
"I dunno," Ranma said. "Is it?"
"It is!" the kendoist shouted. "My -"
"Oh, thanks."
The swordsman was turning somewhat red in the face. He spoke quickly. "The rising new star of the high school kendo world. My strength is beyond measure. I am the captain of the -"
"I thought you were gonna tell me your name?" Ranma interuped.
With a growl, the boy lunged, shouting "The Blue Thunder of Furinkan High - Tatewaki Kuno!" Lightning flashed as he attacked.
"Did he just call himself 'Blue Thunder'?" asked one of Nabiki's companions at the window.
"Have you heard that?"
"Nope," Nabiki said. "It's news to me."
"Last I heard, he was calling himself 'Shooting Star'."
"Maybe it should be 'Black and Blue Blunder'," the first girl suggested, watching as Ranma stepped inside of Kuno's reach and proceeded to work over the older student's belly with a succession of punches. "That new guy's pretty buff."
"He's a moron," Nabiki muttered.
"Well," Ranma noted as he walked into the school. "That was pathetic."
"Oh?" Akane asked. "What about your throat?"
Ranma rubbed the bruise, which Kuno had inflicted in passing as Ranma closed in. "Well, yeah. It's not much more than a graze. Just 'cause he's better than you doesn't make him all that good."D for Drakensis
"An ugly macho guy can never beat an intelligent, slender, popular, and handsome hero."
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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Re: Ignorance
#9
Quote:
...Okay, it has to be asked.
How the flaming smurf did Genma manage this?! It seems beyond even his capabilities to have raised the kid in such complete and absolute ignorance. Surely he'd have picked some of this up just from observing the world and society around him?
In this story, Ranma tends to consider the world and society around him to be Someone Else's Problem. Possibly Genma taught him some dumbass Apathy Fist technique.
(As a side-note, while Ranma is not technically a better martial artist than in canon, he's more effective in fights since he doesn't get distracted as easily. This may be Genma's motive.)
Quote:
And when are people going to start laying blame where it's due, for crying out loud? (Okay, it's Ranma 1/2 so that never happens, but this is ridiculous. [Image: smile.gif] )
I'm sorry, your statement does not compute. Ranma is to blame. Ranma is always to blame. For everything. Ever.D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
Reply
Re: Ignorance
#10
Quote:
I would had thought the Tendo sisters would be overjoyed. One of them marries and he gets on with his life and they with theirs. Besides, they can always divorce after a suitable time frame.
Nabiki might go for that, but Kasumi and Akane probably wouldn't be willing to treat marriage so cavalierly. Even Nabiki might not be willing to - given that she was the only one who dressed up in order to meet Ranma, she may have more romantic urges than she is usually credited with. However, Soun and Genma would oppose it and as the legal heads of the two families they might well be able to prevent it.D for Drakensis
You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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Re: Ignorance
#11
Actually, about Nabiki's initial enthusiasm -- I suspect that has nothing to do with romance, and everything to do with property rights. Whoever marries Ranma inherits the dojo, and presumably the land on which it's situated, which could -- if one were so inclined -- probably be sold to someone interested in putting it to better use. For money money money.
But then she finds out that he's a freak, and she decides that she's not willing to put up with that crap when she can probably come up with some other ways of getting cash. Like selling photos of his girl-type form to the guys, and so on and so forth.
(This is, to my mind, the best way to reconcile the later Nabiki with the early one.)
(Edit: I'm offering commentary on Ranma again. And yet hell has not frozen over. Strange.)
Chris Davies.
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Re: Ignorance
#12
I have to concur. This is special.
E: "Did they... did they just endorse the combination of the JSDF and US Army by showing them as two lesbian lolicons moving in together and holding hands and talking about how 'intimate' they were?"
B: "Have you forgotten so soon? They're phasing out Don't Ask, Don't Tell."
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Re: re:Ignorance
#13
Quote:
Nabiki might go for that, but Kasumi and Akane probably wouldn't be willing to treat marriage so cavalierly. Even Nabiki might not be willing to - given that she was the only one who dressed up in order to meet Ranma, she may have more romantic urges than she is usually credited with. However, Soun and Genma would oppose it and as the legal heads of the two families they might well be able to prevent it.

Maybe she had more romantic urges, but it went ny the wayside fairly quickly. Let's face it, both parties have no intention of getting married as of now. As to Soun and Genma, once Ranma and whoever he married becomes of legal age, what's to prevent them from divorcing?
__________________
Into terror!,  Into valour!
Charge ahead! No! Never turn
Yes, it's into the fire we fly
And the devil will burn!
- Scarlett Pimpernell
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Re: re:Ignorance
#14
Soun looked at Genma. "The curse is looking less and less like a problem, old friend," he said solemnly.
"I'm glad that you see it like that, Soun-old-buddy," Genma replied, perking up slightly.
"If only in comparison to your son's attitude," Soun finished.
"Oh."
"We need to take steps, Genma. If the boy were to just leave then all our plans are for nothing."
"He won't do that," Genma assured the Tendo patriarch. "I admit that his ignorance is an unforeseen problem, but look on the bright side. He can't survive without someone to deal with anything outside the martial arts. And I'm the only person that he knows, so he literally can't leave me. So long as I stay here, he has to stay here with us."
Soun brightened. "That's perfect! And once he's married to one of my daughters he'll be left dependent upon her! He can carry on the schools, and his wife can do the actual running of the household... that's brilliant!"
Genma beamed. "I rather thought so, old friend."
"Of course, these days things are so much more complicated," Soun said thoughtfully. "There's paperwork and so forth... You should send him to school with Akane and Nabiki. That will give them a chance to fall in love."
"School?" Genma frowned. "Well, if you say so, old friend. I can't say I like taking the time away from his training, but if it helps the marriage..."
"Besides," Soun added absently. "I suppose it must have been difficult for his schooling, to move around as much as you have. They expect sensei's to have college degrees these days, you know, so he'll want to get caught up."
"College?" Genma asked faintly.
Soun nodded. "Ridiculous, isn't it? But we have to move with the times..." He held up the bottle of sake they were sharing and tilted it thoughtfully. "How strange... this is empty. When did that happen?" He cracked the seal on a second bottle, thus missing the worried look on Genma's face as he desperately tried to remember what sort of education was needed to get into a college. He was almost certain that being able to read would be necessary...
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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Re: re:Ignorance
#15
This is a classic, Drakensis, and something rare these days -- a new take on Ranma. Bravo! Please don't stop.
-- Bob
---------
...The President is on the line
As ninety-nine crab rangoons go by...
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Ignorance
#16
"You mean you fight Kuno everyday?" Ranma asked in a conversational voice.
"Shhh," Akane hissed as the teacher turned around to look for the source of the voice. She waited until the man had turned away again before nodding her head. "Yes. And somehow, I always win."
"That ain't right," Ranma said flatly. "He's better'n you are. Either he's got some major weak point you keep hitting, or he's holdin' back way more than he should."
"Why do you think that he's better than me?" Akane demanded. "If you fought me for real, you'd see that."
"If I fought you full contact, you'd never learn anythin'." Ranma said. "Except that I can kick your ass any time I want to. Kuno should do what I did - fight just enough ahead of ya that you have to push yerself. He's teachin' ya bad habits."
"Kuno isn't my teacher!" Akane snapped.
"No," the teacher said, irritably, looking over at her. "I am. Go stan-"
The exact nature of the reprimand that he was about to impose would forever be a mystery, albeit not one that would be delved into by many scholars over the years. For in mid-word he was cut off by someone slamming open the sliding door with such force that it hopped off it's runner and jammed open.
"Upperclassman Kuno?" Akane gasped.
"Ranma Saotome!" Kuno declared. "I won't allow it!"
"Allow what?" Ranma asked, freeing himself from the confines of desk and chair in readiness for a brisk bout of violence.
"This engagement of yours to Akane! I, Tatewaki Kuno, shall never, never -"
"What engagement?" Ranma's face was the very picture of innocence. "I thought you didn't want to get engaged, Akane? Didja change your mind?"
"WHAT!?" went up a chorus from the rest of the class around them. "Engagement!?" "You're kidding!" "Oh no!" "Is this for real, Akane?"
"And you said you despised men!" one girl said.
"It's not like that!" Akane protested.
Ranma scratched his head. "What the heck's everyone getting so excited about?"
Kuno gave an incoherent shout and attacked the red-shirted boy. Contrary to the basic tenets of narrativism, he dodged successfully, bounding up and off Kuno's head, to land in the corridor outside.
"Coward!" Kuno accused, spinning on his bare feet to face his opponent.
Ranma glanced around. A straight corridor, no real room to maneuver. "This is no place to fight," he declared. "Follow me."
"That I shall!" Kuno cried, giving chase as Ranma sprinted for the end of the corridor.
Ranma rounded a corner and spotted an open window. He jumped onto the sill, turning to his pursuer. "Let's take the fastest way down," he called, and leapt out.
"Very well!" Kuno followed with a jump that carried him through the window without even touching the frame. Due to Ranma's slight upward thrust, they were falling at more or less the same level, Ranma further from the building.
"You idiots!" Akane yelled, reaching the window. "This is the third floor!"
Kuno's face was a rictus of fear as he realised just how high they were. Ranma shook his head. I know she's gotten the idea that she's smarter than me from somewhere, but does she really think I can't count that high? He looked down and grimaced. Oh great. Water.
Water fountained into the air as the duelling pair cannonballed into the swimming pool.
D for Drakensis

You're only young once, but immaturity is forever.
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