"Twee", as defined by Merriam-Webster, means "affectedly or excessively dainty, delicate, cute or quaint."
It's the only word I can come up with to describe the effect the narrative voice has on me (as well as some of the plot elements). I wouldn't mind it if the entire piece was from the POV of 5-year-old Harry, but the same voice informs scenes where only adults take part. And it causes a severe cognitive dissonance for me when I read scenes with the elder Malfoys, because if Lucius is at all in character, he is not just being a fond parent, he is also plotting how to take advantage of discovering that the Boy-Who-Lived is all but unprotected. While I liked the earlier chapters -- Marge turning out to be a decent person if you got to her early enough is a great idea -- the more recent chapters have been pinging my wrongness radar.
-- Bob
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Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.
It's the only word I can come up with to describe the effect the narrative voice has on me (as well as some of the plot elements). I wouldn't mind it if the entire piece was from the POV of 5-year-old Harry, but the same voice informs scenes where only adults take part. And it causes a severe cognitive dissonance for me when I read scenes with the elder Malfoys, because if Lucius is at all in character, he is not just being a fond parent, he is also plotting how to take advantage of discovering that the Boy-Who-Lived is all but unprotected. While I liked the earlier chapters -- Marge turning out to be a decent person if you got to her early enough is a great idea -- the more recent chapters have been pinging my wrongness radar.
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.