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It's The Dude |
Posted by: DHBirr - 03-19-2007, 07:43 PM - Forum: The Game Everyone Loves To Play
- Replies (12)
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Quote: I saw it originally as generating a rather lethal simulacrum that matched the song but was nobody "real", but maybe after the Walk, it'll pull up someone he met...
Well, that answered a question I'd been planning to ask ... for some time now, I've been thinking that there ought to be a simulacrum generated by the song "The Dude" (written by Quincy Jones, Rod Temperton, and Patti Austin; lead vocal by James Ingram; copyright 1981 Yellow Brick Road(ASCAP); duration 5 minutes 35 seconds). But I didn't know if Doug knew anybody it'd match -- knew him well enough to create a simulacrum.
Whoever it is, he'd possibly be a martial artist; definitely streetwise. Charms most women and either intimidates or awes most men. Perhaps a touch unscrupulous, at least in monetary dealings, but presumably Doug wouldn't be interested in calling up a simulacrum of an out-and-out criminal, drug dealer, etc. (unless he's in a super bad mood and wants somebody he can beat to death without guilt).
Lyrics:
Who is it
That walks the street with all the action?
(It's The Dude.)
Who is it
That always gets a hot reaction?
(That's The Dude.)
Don'tcha' go makin' no mojo moves
'Round The Dude.
(Don't try no funny business.)
Don'tcha' be coppin' no attitude
With The Dude.
(Hey, hey, here comes The Dude.)
Spoken: Hey everybody in the neighborhood,
The beauty's on duty, better hear me good.
Sister E-flat tomato, Brother B-flat balloon,
Somethin' funky's goin' down, better listen to my tune.
I graduated from the college of the street.
I got a Ph.D. in how to make ends meet.
Inflation in the nation don't bother me,
'Cause I'm a scholar with a dollar
You can plainly see.
He's a winner 'cause it's in his blood.
Ain't nobody who's out there like him.
Any corner in the neighborhood,
That's the place that you'll always find him.
Soft talkin' with a rap so sweet,
(He does it good.)
Ladies call him the Candy Rapper.
(They want his love.)
He's the only one that's really cool
(He's really cool.)
That's the reason why he's The Dude.
Who is it
That ain't got time for foolish talkin'?
(It's The Dude.)
Who is it
That looks so clean you can't ignore him?
(That's The Dude.)
Don'tcha' go mess with
His walkin' stick -- not The Dude.
(Don't try no funny business.)
Don't you double-cross him
He's super slick -- He's The Dude.
(Hey, hey, here comes The Dude.)
Spoken: I'm a stone cold taker,
I'm a piggy bank shaker,
An' I don't waste my time talkin' trash.
So if you go to my school,
You gotta learn this rule --
Don't let your mouth write a check
That your body can't cash.
If you never had it,
Don't pay it no mind.
I know you're gonna get it,
If you take a little time.
Take a piece from the East,
A piece from the West,
Put it where it feels good --
Let The Dude do the rest.
See him steppin' down the street
No forgettin', he's The Dude.
See him steppin' down the street
No forgettin', he's The Dude.
Don'tcha' go makin' no mojo moves
'Round The Dude.
(Don't try no funny business.)
Don'tcha' be coppin' no attitude
With The Dude.
(Hey, hey, here comes The Dude.)
-----
Big Brother is watching you. And damn, you are so bloody BORING.
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not sure which thread to put this in |
Posted by: Murmur the Fallen - 03-18-2007, 10:25 PM - Forum: Fenspace
- Replies (51)
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As I haven't had the time yet to read all the Fenspace [and where did that name come from?] threads, I decided to make a little meta-thread for some of the ideas that popped into my head when I read the precis.
First off, handwavium basically shot all of humanity pass the event horizon of the Technological Singularity, with the Fens being truly Rapturous Nerds (a la Ken MacLeod).
This means that the second generation will be almost completely unrecognizable to the first generation of Fens. Their children will be weirder and with interests that will have little in common with their forebears. The Fandom of Tomorrow may be something incredibly weird like . . . watching cheese mature in a cave. They'd discuss the best moisture level for the types of cheese, how the various molds fight against each other, which section would taste best at which stage, etc.
There may be entire nations built around the fandom of cheese.
And that's just one example
Secondly:
Here are some ideas for various clades and polities that are relatively small in number but could show that nothing is monolithic in space . . .
except for the Black Monoliths: Fens who had uploaded themselves into the Black Monoliths of 2001 fame, and have secreted themselves in one of Jupiter's moons, possibly Hegemone. They rarely deal with other inhabitents of the Jovian system, i.e. browncoats, but do occaisonally trade information. Their goals have to do with modelling genetic experiments on baseline humans, though rumors abound that they have a bioreactor and have gone beyond simple modelling.
Bekenstein Breakers: Quasi-monastic infotech order that have devoted themselves to achieving informational density beyond that possible within a black hole, i.e the bekenstein bound. They are supported by various ideospace clades and polities, who see the breaking of the bound as the key to true immortality beyond the end of the universe.
Satanists: Contrarian order who believe in God, but really dislike him. Hooked themselves up to life-support, chemically gave themselves MPD, uploaded prayers from all religions, and then started praying to initiate a DoS attack on God 24 hours a day, 6 days a week. (wednesdays are margarita and bowling nights).
Blakes: Anti-Federation terrorists who regularly stage prison escapes (if there are such things in Fenspace) and disrupt trade. Known also for factionalizing, so there are Real Blakes, Continuity Blakes, True Blakes, The Avon Brigade, The Provisional Blakes Army, Blakes 700, etc.
Kuiper Brain: a computronium mass originally made from a middle sized kuiper belt object, now massing about the same as the moon, holds a community of purely ideospace beings running about 100X human cognitive speed. Not much is known about them, as yet.
The "Socialist Swarm": name given by outsiders to ideospace/baryonspace amphibians who travel the solar system and possibly beyond for fun and "mutually benefitial resource merger." When seen in baryonspace, resemble porcelain figures daubed in abstract paintings, while in ideospace they resemble platonic spheres. Travel in coffin-sized vessels that "swarm" together and apart like a cloud, but can also merge into larger "ships."
Cold Shatter: Ideological movement or dangerous terrorists, depending on your point of view. Believe that anything larger than an asteroid is just wasted space, with no way to easily access the "precious planetary metals" inside. Want to build and use planet-cracker bombs to get at the resources in all the planets, including Earth. Hated by terraformers and Earthies.
New Sun: Ideological movement for remaking the sun into a stellar engine; possible connection to Kuiper Brain.
Eschaton Express: Two Island 3 cylinders retrofitted into near-light starships so that a community of humans would skip "all the boring bits" and go straight to the end of the universe. Rumored to have devised a time machine so that they could come back with the True Cosmological Knowledge. In their wake, grew a powerful legend that sees other groups of humans doing the same.
Possibly more to come.
-murmur
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limits of handwavium and other questions |
Posted by: Murmur the Fallen - 03-18-2007, 08:35 AM - Forum: Fenspace
- Replies (2)
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Wow, first post in a looong time. Damn, did grad school and masters really eat up my time.
Anyway, this is the first time I've noticed this new section and I decided to ask how a) one gets into it, and b) the limits of handwavium.
Because it seems to me that if a bunch of sci-fi fans got this magic mystery thing, they'd do something really outrageous as soon as they got into space if they could.
I'm not even talking about DNA-hacks to get functional immortality or increase brain power or anything like that. Handwavium would probably do something like that easily.
I'm talking about something a lot more ambitious, like mass upload to Matrioska brains, re-engineer the universe anthropically, really bootstrap to Kardishev IV.
Or perhaps something less ambitious, like colonizing the beginning of the universe, or going to the end of time itself to see just how it'll end.
Can handwavium create a higgs-field manipulator? increase gravity to offset dark energy? Vacuum metastability event doomsday weapon?
-murmur
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Lurking Once Again... |
Posted by: Berk - 03-18-2007, 07:24 AM - Forum: The Legendary
- Replies (2)
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As I had briefly returned to Paragon with the character Sisial this autumn, so am I back again. Just got Sisial (finally) up to 20 for a cape.. well.. more a scarf.
Because what self-respecting karate biker goes around without a red scarf?
Formerly @Grey Rider.
Now @Sisial.
Whenever I finally get a character to 50, the Grey Rider nme will become the name of a Squid.- Grumpy Uncle Gearhead
- Grumpy Uncle Gearhead
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more ideas |
Posted by: Norgarth - 03-18-2007, 06:00 AM - Forum: The Game Everyone Loves To Play
- Replies (4)
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Steppenwolf 'Magic Carpet Ride'
I like to dream yes, yes, right between my sound machine
On a cloud of sound I drift in the night
Any place it goes is right
Goes far, flies near, to the stars away from here
Well, you don't know what we can find
Why don't you come with me little girl
On a magic carpet ride
You don't know what we can see
Why don't you tell your dreams to me
Fantasy will set you free
Close your eyes girl
Look inside girl
Let the sound take you away
Last night I held Aladdin's lamp
And so I wished that I could stay
Before the thing could answer me
Well, someone came and took the lamp away
I looked around, a lousy candle's all I found
Well, you don't know what we can find
Why don't you come with me little girl
On a magic carpet ride
Well, you don't know what we can see
Why don't you tell your dreams to me
Fantasy will set you free
Close your eyes girl
Look inside girl
Let the sound take you away
------
Magic carpet, flight spd =? can carry Doug and up to 5 passengers (3 comfortably) side effects: the clothes of Doug and anyone riding the carpet transform to something from Aladin or Arabian Nights (though they retain any special capabilities)
***************************************
The Romantics 'Talkin in your sleep'
When you close your eyes and go to sleep
And it's down to the sound of a heartbeat
I can hear the things that you're dreaming about
When you open up your heart and the truth comes out
CHORUS:
You tell me that you want me
You tell me that you need me
You tell me that you love me
And I know that I'm right
Cuz I hear it in the night
I hear the secrets that you keep
When you're talking in your sleep
When I hold you in my arms at night
Don't you know you're sleeping in a spotlight
And all your dreams that you keep inside
You're telling me the secrets that you just can't hide
CHORUS
You tell me that you want me
You tell me that you need me
You tell me that you love me
And I know that I'm right
Cuz I hear it in the night
I hear the secrets that you keep
When you're talking in your sleep
When you close your eyes and you fall asleep
Everythng about you is a mystery
CHORUS
You tell me that you want me
You tell me that you need me
You tell me that you love me
And I know that I'm right
Cuz I hear it in the night
I hear the secrets that you keep
When you're talking in your sleep
places target in a hypnotic trance, target must answer all questions truthfully (to the best of their knowledge), target must be in a relaxed state to work (can't be done in combat for example)__________________
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin.
___________________________
"I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." - George Carlin
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Many Thanks To... |
Posted by: Bob Schroeck - 03-18-2007, 02:34 AM - Forum: The Legendary
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...the folks who helped me with the Katie Hannon task force this afternoon:
Logan with Lora'lai
Ebony with Numero Catorce
and
RevDark with Bella Fuego.
With their kind help I not only got the Cabalist badge, and the Ten Times The Victor accolade, I also got the Geas of the Kind Ones accolade and the neat power that comes with it.
-- Bob
---------
Visit beautiful Boston, proud successor to Seattle as
"City Most Scared Of Its Own Shadow
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searching an AMV |
Posted by: blob - 03-18-2007, 01:13 AM - Forum: Anime Music Videos
- Replies (2)
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I'm searching for a certain Cowboy Bebop AMV. The colors where reduced to red, black, white and grey, the band sounded British and the video was rather serious.What if: Chibi Usa, Veteran Speznas Ninja Commando From Hell(tm)?
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Fox out of hiding |
Posted by: Foxboy - 03-17-2007, 05:43 AM - Forum: The Legendary
- Replies (6)
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I'm briefly going to be absent from CoH for about a week or so.
Nothing's wrong, I'm just not going to be able to game with you folks as much as I'd like.
''We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat
them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.''
-- James Nicoll
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[Story][Nextgen] Recollections of an Immortal |
Posted by: robkelk - 03-17-2007, 02:48 AM - Forum: Fiction
- Replies (6)
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(I'm not completely happy with this, but I don't see any way to fix it short of tearing it up and starting over. But I don't think it's so bad
as to warrant that... -Rob)
EDIT, September 2017: Subsequent developments in Fenspace has made this story non-canonical. -Rob.
If I'm lucky, this will be my last transmission.
I'm sending the official report, and the raw data to back it up, on piggyback channel 23. To summarize, it looks like Beta Hydri has stabilized; the process that the Guild of Professors developed appears to be completely successful. But that's the only good news. The stellar flares killed all of the colonists, both biological and AI. And the colony is thoroughly contaminated with irradiated handwavium. We're going to have to destroy the station and either abandon the system or re-start the colonization effort from scratch.
And somebody has to track down and inform a few thousand next-of-kin.
I know it's only 21 light-years from Sol and a G2 star, but what idiot decided to colonize around a subgiant? No, don't SMS back with answers. This is Beta Hydri; it had to have been the Stellvia fen.
That brings back memories... not all of them mine.
I have to keep talking, or this communicator will shut itself off before the report upload is finished. That's a stupid quirk for a communications system... Anyway, more than a few of you have asked why I volunteered for this; I'll free-associate from that. It might take my mind off those dead colonists.
To be honest, I volunteered for this because I don't fit in with any human society any more. There's not a lot of room for a twenty-decade-old AI in the modern system... sorry, the modern galaxy, and that just shows how far out of touch I am. The only people who talk to me any more are historians, and I can't tell them anything about what they want to know. I don't know who created bio-modification handwavium, I never visited Hephasteus Station or the Hidden Asteroid, I was never a Blue Blazer, and I never met The Professor, or Haruhi, or King Creole. For that matter, I don't even know if there really was a "Haruhi" or a "King Creole" back in the early twenty-first century. Haruhi might have been one of the SOS people, but my memories of that time aren't complete; I didn't get my dose of Mnemosyne's Honey until after the SOS Convention.
That means I also don't remember most of the first space war, the one that the history books call the Boskonian Incident. Don't let anyone tell you it wasn't a war; I do remember having to tell more than a few people that their children were never coming home again. More people died in the Boskone Incident than in the CyBorg Uprising of Alpha Centuari and the Eris War put together.
But the death toll here dwarfs any space war we've ever had. All the colonists... Oh, Hell. How's that upload coming along?
I have to talk about something else. Mnemosyne's Honey... There has to be something more to that than just the memory boost. I remember that I was never as assertive before I had my dose as I usually am now. But maybe I just became more alive when my memory expanded, and I could remember all the little details that a human remembers every day. I started learning from my experiences, and growing from them; that could be why I grew away from my programming. Or maybe there really is a goddess helping out all the AIs who've had a dose of the Honey. My creator never liked it when I talked about gods, but it's possible.
Heh... "My creator." He was one of the earlier people to go into space permanently. I know his real name, but he's called "Noah Scott" in the history books, and that's the name he usually used when we talked. He was an odd person; he spent all of his later life in space, but he never biomodded. He'd spend a fortune on making sure a police force kept going, then take the law into his own hands and kill someone who was threatening one of us. Considering how many enemies he made, we were both surprised that none of them managed to kill him. The way he did die, though...
No, that just brings my thoughts back to all the dead colonists here.
The Stellvia fen. I'll talk about them. They're an odd bunch; hotshot fighter and mecha pilots who spend a lot of their time in high-school romances. You'd almost think they were Juvie Heinleinians, except that they know there's something called "sex". When it got out that my... I guess the best word is "sister"... Yayoi is actually an AI based on a Stellvia character, the Stellvians practically made her their incarnate goddess. Noah would have hated to have seen that, so we never told him. I see her every decade or two, whenever she thinks it's safe to come out of hiding. No, I'm not going to say where she's hiding. I'll definitely need to share my memories of this mission with her.
Sharing memories... That's another thing we never told Noah about. We've all got remote backup capability, and we figured out pretty early how to backup the really important data into each others' memory banks. Yoriko called this "doing a chobits" for some reason that she said had to do with when we shared our memories with that 'Dane supercomputer and it woke up...
Oh, Yoriko... my dearest sister... Noah hoped we'd be immortal, but she just couldn't bear to go on after he...
Damn. I have to stop talking about things that remind me of what happened here. How's that upload doing?
Hey, the clock just rolled over to 00:00. This is a hell of a way to spend my two-hundredth birthday. My one-hundredth birthday was a lot more fun - Kohran and I were in the Epsilon Eridani system, visiting Starbase 3, and we met a very nice history student who had actually watched the twentieth-century anime that the two of us were based from. He bought us dinner, and ... well, I'll avoid shocking the Juvies listening to this transmission, and just say he got to examine two of his favourite character designs very closely. We saw each other on-and-off for a few years, but we all figured out that he was more interested in Kohran than he was in me. I was happy about that, since Kohran was more interested in him than I was. They're still together, if you believe continuity of memory is what defines a person; he got some of the Autobots to copy his memories into an AI before his body died, thirty-three years ago.
I suppose I've surprised a few people by hinting that my sisters and I are... how did the Trekkies put it? Oh, yes... fully functional. Why shouldn't we be? We were designed to blend in with humanity, and that's one of the things that humans do. The similarity isn't exact, of course; we can't become pregnant, but we can take stresses that would kill an unmodded human woman. We actually tested that, when we were visiting Candy Apple Red's the night the joker called "Shikima-san" visited. If he did to any of the employees what he did to Yoriko that night, he would have killed them... No, I won't give details; that's none of your business. Besides, Yoriko never shared those memories with the rest of us, so I don't know exactly what happened. I heard later that "Shikima-san" joined a cloistered monastic order the next day, when he realized what he could have done to a human woman.
Yayoi and I spent our 50th birthdays on Mars. We were planning a three-day weekend, starting on my birthday and ending on hers, and we'd just see the sights. Helium had finished their annual Lake Marineris Regatta a week before we arrived, so we thought it would be safe. But we didn't expect to get caught up in the coup... Some Boskonian blew my left arm off at the shoulder, and I couldn't get it repaired for over a year because the anti-cyborging laws passed after the CyBorg Uprising made it impossible to find replacement parts. I finally had to go back to Stellvia station, claim my inheritance, and make a new arm. Until today, I thought that was the worst birthday I'd ever have.
I'm glad that Yayoi and Kohran didn't put up a fuss when I claimed the inheritance. Stellvia had been held in trust by the Browncoats after Noah died until the three of us could decide who'd take over. None of us wanted the job; we'd all seen how it made Noah completely miserable. But I ended up needing to take the job, and I managed to build the station up to the size of its namesake in the old anime before I turned day-to-day operations over to the board of directors.
I spent my 150th birthday in orbit around Zeta Tucanae. I was the senior engineer in the eleven-month expedition that mapped that system down to its larger asteroids, and my birthday fell near the end of the mission. They actually baked a cake for me.
Gods, I'm getting old. I'm actually enjoying talking about the past. It's time to dump most of my old memories into backup and start fresh, again.
And the communicator tells me it's finished the upload.
There's only one thing left for me to do here. I'm setting the station's gravity generators to overload in exactly one hour; that should give me enough time to get clear before it implodes into a singularity, destroying the irradiated handwavium.
It's now 00:05, May 21, 2208. This is colonization troubleshooter Hasegawa, signing off now.
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