So, I've been reading an awful lot of Worm 'fics lately. And one of the scenarios that so rarely seems to get any interest is the post-canon situation. Sure, there's Copacetic and one of the Exalted crossovers (both of which are Awesome, by the way).
A few of you may have seen bits of this, and I'll be posting soon over on Spacebattles and SufficientVelocity, but, well, I trust folks here to give constructive criticism a bit more than I do those lunatics.
So! Episode Zero, Super Dimension Magical Girl Lyrical Skitter, hajimarimasu!
                --- * --- 0 --- * --- 0 --- * ---
The laboratory facility was brightly lit, and the walls painted a gleaming white, the better for any speck of contamination or distortion to show itself instantly. When you were working with the dimensional boundaries, instantly spotting any breach was of the utmost necessity. Especially with this particular boundary.
The Baerzen wall had sprung into being some thirty years previously, sealing off a massive swath of dimensional space. It was named after the only explorer to have returned from beyond it, who had warned his comrades of immense monsters, madness, and danger to the entire multiverse, before expiring. The facility was officially the Baerzen Memorial Dimensional Transit Research Institute, but the scientists, mages, and soldiers who worked there just called it The Hole.
Major Tiida Lanster, chief of security for the Hole, set aside his coffee mug to look over the new transfer seated across the desk from him. She was young, clearly a recent Academy graduate, with long auburn hair and wide blue eyes. Freshly polished Second-Lieutenant's tabs gleamed on the collar of her uniform. He paused a moment to look down at her file.
"So, Lieutenant... Takamachi. Let me be the first to welcome you to the Baerzen Facility security team. Given your previous experience, I suppose you were expecting something a little more exciting for your first official assignment with the Bureau?"
The girl blushed. And actually giggled. She stifled it as soon as she realized what she was doing, but still, she giggled. Charmingly young. "Ano, er, well," she said, "The Jewel Seed incident could've been pretty messy, but it ended well, didn't it? And the Book of Darkness, well, I'm really hoping nobody has to deal with anything that, er, exciting, ever again."
"... We'll see, Lieutenant, and I think we're all hoping the same. But that's why we have security at facilities like these, to make sure that kind of thing doesn't happen again. As much as we're able, that is." Tiida took another sip of coffee and watched the girl for another long moment. "Your assignment here does not mean," he finally added, "that command expects something to happen. Given the kind of research being done here, however, the possibility is all too real. That's not why you're here, though, Lieutenant Takamachi."
She nodded, sitting straighter. "Yes, Major. Colonel Grangeitz told me when he gave me the assignment that he just wanted me to learn to work with a team."
Good, she was paying attention. That was what might keep her alive long enough to realize the potential described in the reports Tiida had read. He let his eyes drift to the photograph on the corner of his desk, then forced his attention back to the Lieutenant. "More than that, you need to learn to work with a commanding officer that isn't a close personal friend. Which I'm not. And the actual director of the facility... well, her you do know. I do hope your past won't be a factor in your ability to work with Doctor Testarossa?"
Whatever answer she might have been about to give was erased by the blare of sirens and the urgent calls for security to the main research lab.
                        - 0 --- * --- 0 -
Ten minutes ago
The main research lab was active today. Consoles displayed graphs and plots of nearby dimensional space, control indicators blinked on and off, and there was a comforting soft hum of magitronics. (Mostly generated by the various machines' cooling units, really, but it was genuinely comforting. Many people found actual silence disturbing.)
At the center of the lab, several large objects that - to the untrained eye - looked vaguely like massive energy cannons of some sort surrounded a slightly-raised dais some three meters across. Each of the probes pulsed in a slightly different rhythm, lights trailing down their length to illustrate the dimensional energy they were pouring into the space tau-adjacent to the lab (which is to say, identically located in three-dimensional space, but slightly displaced along an orthogonal dimensional axis).
"Dimensional probe experiment number six four alpha three seven, cycle  six, supervising: Doctor Presea Testarossa, Doctor Lawrence Fleinhardt, Doctor Peter Bishop, security adjunct Sergeant Raymond Marlowe." The computer voice listed a variety of testing parameters, echoing the commands the scientists had previously input. "Ready to commence at your command, Doctor Testarossa."
The lead scientist on the project was tall and brown-haired, with only  faint wrinkling around her eyes to show her age. "If security concurs?" she asked, turning briefly in the direction of the black-uniformed watchdog.
"No issues here, Doctor," replied Marlowe. "Please carry on."
"Very well. Begin trial six four alpha three seven, cycle six," Presea instructed the computer.
The power began to rise in the dimensional probes, the lights growing stronger and brighter. In some the pulses quickened, in others they slowed, as the machines began to force a specifically-designed resonance onto the dimensional boundaries surrounding the dais.
The next minute or two passed as so many had before, in the hundreds of trials the research team had run, trying to find ways to peer beyond the Wall. Colors shimmered and twisted as the fabric of space-time itself was subjected to stresses and forces beyond the imagination of those who had first seen the Wall rise. Watching a series of readouts, the three scientists adjusted their equipment carefully, guiding the immense energies that stretched and twisted at the part of space-time that the Wall occupied. With a very little luck, they hoped to open a tiny breach in that wall, a way to push through a probe to examine what lay beyond.
Minutes into their experiment, something else pressed against the Wall. Something from the other side.
"We're getting flaring in the Gimel ranges," Doctor Fleinhardt said, noticing the first signs of it. "Something's pushing back against the probe."
"It's never done that before," remarked Bishop. "Whoa, that's interesting. I'm getting something in the Yod range, too. Increasing power to compensate."
Presea nodded and adjusted controls of her own. "I'm adjusting the gamma frequencies as well. This is very promising." Her pursed lips did not display pleasure, however. It reminded her too well, also, of the tragic day her first career had ended.
The experiment continued for some minutes more, the twisting, shifting colors occupying the space above the dais growing in intensity and complexity as the energy patterns built. The trio moved quickly to adapt their probes to each new variation in the resonance that built in the Wall.
And then it all came to a sudden, juddering halt. Electricity arced around the probes as energy fed back into them from the Wall, the colors started to solidify into a gleaming fractal pattern, and the room filled with the groaning hum of overstressed magitronics.
With a crash, several of the probes went dark, smoke billowing from them as their delicate circuitry overloaded and shorted out. The twisting, shifting color-space above the dais froze, glowed brighter, and then fell apart in a shower of sparks, leaving a single solid form slumped on the gleaming white surface. A closer look proved the form to be human, scarred, bleeding, and incomplete, the right arm terminating in a cauterized stump just below the elbow.
"Congratulations, Doc, it's a girl," quipped Bishop.
Sirens howled through the facility as Sergeant Marlowe pressed his panic button, and then the lights went out.
                        - 0 --- * --- 0 -
"… in short," Presea concluded, "We were able to open a small dimensional distortion, but before we could insert a probe, we apparently intersected another distortion coming from the far side. The result propelled our, ah, guest, through the breach thus created, and the resonance of that passage appears to have closed the breach. We're still measuring the effects on the Wall, but it looks like it may actually have been locally reinforced by this."
Nanoha sat at the back of the room, one of several minor officers invited to the briefing. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat; despite her assurances to Major Lanster, she was still wary of Presea. Their first meeting had gone so very poorly, after all, even if everything had worked out in the end.
"Speaking of our guest," the director added, "What can you tell us about her, Doctor Yamada?"
"Of course, Madam Director." He gestured, his Device projecting a holographic image over the table. It showed the girl who had appeared in the laboratory, now cleaned and dressed in a hospital gown, resting on a standard diagnostic bed. "The subject is, so far as we can tell, mostly human, with only the most minimal of augmentations. Female, obviously enough, and I'd put her age between sixteen and twenty-two standard years. She has several fairly significant scars, the most obvious being the severed arm, which appears to have been cauterized rather crudely by whatever event caused it. Poor girl's been through the wars," he commented.
The image zoomed in on her head, overlaying a transparent layer of internal detail, rotating to focus on the brain. "The augmentation I mentioned consists of one, possibly two, small sub-nodes added to the brain. Possibly some sort of processing support, or the like; it appears to have been directly connected to her Linker Core. I can't get much detail on the augment itself because it was mostly destroyed just before whatever event brought her here."
"This would be the injury that left her bleeding from multiple head wounds in the middle of my laboratory, Doctor Yamada?"
"Precisely, madam Director. It's…" He trailed off for a moment, reaching up to run one hand over his slicked-back black hair. "It's at once one of the most barbaric, yet surgically precise, that I've ever seen."
Nanoha frowned. That didn't sound good. It looked like Presea agreed, too.
"Explain, please, Doctor Yamada."
The medical specialist rotated the projection yet again, this time adding highlights to display the wound traces he described. "The subject was shot, twice, with a mass weapon, some sort of slugthrower. Targeted very precisely so as to do the maximum damage to the augmentation with minimal effect on the rest of the brain. Whoever did this was either incredibly lucky, or knew exactly what they were doing. Given the probabilities of such a thing happening by chance, I lean towards the latter option, no matter how incredible it seems. Someone deliberately destroyed her augmentation while taking incredible effort to do so without injuring her further… and did so using the crudest tools imaginable. I could do better with, with stone knives and bearskins."
-- tsuzuku
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

Anyone seen the new anime yet?
youtube link to op:
http://www.youtube.com/v/c0Va228UhRs&ve ... tube_gdata
__________________
Into terror!,  Into valour!
Charge ahead! No! Never turn
Yes, it's into the fire we fly
And the devil will burn!
- Scarlett Pimpernell

Previous thread is previous

Spoiler

MST3K: The Movie

Pretty much my reaction when Tsjoat told me about Dash Con.
Then I Googled it and got this:http://jezebel.com/the-tumblr-user-conv ... 1604571770
OMFG...  Ladies and gentlemen...  I have no words...

http://www.torontosun.com/2014/07/22/ge ... -seriously

With the tree dead, here comes the sun...

(Somebody tell Alanis that this is ironic.)
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

http://www.kuriositas.com/2014/07/monty ... s-and.html]A fifty-foot dead parrot
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

We'll be in the middle of Chamberfest on August 1. Like most music festivals, they've branched out in their selection of styles... but this may be the biggest "chamber" ever.

http://www.chamberfest.com/ai1ec_event/ ... ce_id=4407
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

Wants, Needs and Desires

FSOG housing, Solaris 7 Station: 2024

Loviatar fidgeted in the bed as she waited for her
husband to fall completely asleep.  What
she wanted to do was snuggle up to him and his fuzzy warmness and go to
sleep.  She had to do something though,
because if she simply ignored the problem and snuggled up to her sleeping
husband then the problem would still be there in the morning, staring at her
from an empty spot at the table in their quarters.  Problems were meant to be faced, to be
solved, and this was one she had to face without him and his dour optimism.

Easing herself out of their bed she made her way
quietly as she could out of the room while wrapping herself in a robe and
padding into the living room of their station side quarters.  With the bedroom door pulled to she sat down
at the desktop terminal and brought the sleeping computer to full power.  First she checked the various infomorph and
scientist forums and chat rooms for the person she was looking for with no
luck.  It was however 0200 on most
stations in Fenspace so the cyber was likely either asleep herself or involved
in some sort of experiment and not likely to answer directly anyway.  Both frustrated and relieved that she would
have to deal with this at almost a 3rd person level, Loviatar simply wrote A.C.
Peters an email requesting a checkup and meeting as soon as practical for the
scientist, sent it, and then went back to her bed and husband.

As she drifted off to sleep next to her husband, she
thought back to her meeting with the Mad all those years ago...

2014

James had told her that she would like the surprise
he had in store for her, she however didn’t particularly care for surprises,
they tended to hurt. That said she was surprised when they contacted Prometheus
forge for landing clearance.

“A.C., this is my partner Loviatar,” the wolf biomod
said from the step of the bus to the mad. “I need you to make her a new body.”
It was strange to hear a bus squeal like a school girl but it managed it
somehow while Wolfboy just watched A.C. Peter’s jaw just drop.

“I know some people love their cars but [i]damn[/i]…”
The raven-haired cyborg muttered, before straightening up and shooting the
furry morph a look that even Loviatar felt.

“Jeez A.C.,” James said stepping back from the
glare, “It’s not like that I swear. She needs a new body, and I owe her my life
a half dozen times over or more. I can’t keep fixing this old prison bus
because of what the boskies did when they modded it, but I can get her a humanoid
form body to replace it. Also, while I won’t say money is no object, you find
out what she wants and I’ll pay you either in credits or supplies or a mixture
thereof,”

Loviatar didn’t know if she would melt into the
plush leather seat, drift off into the clouds on the scent of the wildflowers
in the vase, or make a mess of herself from the homemade cookies on the coffee
table. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she realized what all safety measures
in KoFen were for now. And this wasn’t even a fully realized simulation.

“Right then Miss Loviatar,” A.C. crossed her legs,
the movement pulling the A.I.’s attention back to the moment. “What is it you
want in particular? I’ll use your self-image as a start point.”

In the air between them, a holographic model of her
current avatar appeared.

The image that appeared was that of a base Naomi
Armitage, a slight bit more meat on the body softening some of the curves and
rounding the face pleasantly before putting her in an actual U.S. Marine Corps
Woman’s Dress Blue uniform. “Also, well…” The A.I. fidgeted with her hands,
looking away from the emerald-eyed Mad. “I’d like to be, well, able to properly
thank him?”

To the side of the model, a window titled options
popped into existence. The entry “Fully Biomorphic.” wrote itself into the top
of it. Risking a glance at the woman on the other side of the table, the A.I.
didn’t see anything other than a patient expression on her face. “Anything else,”
The cyborg asked calmly. “Any specifics on appearance or capabilities?” This
caused Loviatar to fidget a bit more.

“I’m surprised.” A.C. said gently. “Given your
reaction in the bay I’d have thought you’d have an extensive list of things
you’d like to have.”

Without a word, Loviatar sent her the wish list. It materialized,
floating in front of the cyberneticist. She took it in at a glance, and the
model changed slightly.

 “That’s the
basics down.” A.C. told her, and indeed the Options window had filled out with
several new entries. “However, we need to talk about a few things.”

Loviatar blinked as her list returned. Most of the
list was greyed out, but several items were crossed out with attached bubbles
containing notes. Others were highlighted. “I’m guessing that there are
problems attached to the other items?” Loviatar asked.

“Mostly they don’t exist or else they are highly
regulated as military tech.” the cyber answered. “Others will be difficult and
or expensive, but doable with the right paperwork, the easy stuff I’ve already
added to the list.”

“Military tech might be available; we work for Great
Justice in a new division.” Loviatar answered. “And as much as both of us hate
paper work it can be done, so money might be the only thing holding things
back.”

2024

The cockpit window clunked as it closed, one of the fen
craft fighters few quirks. Originally an A-4 Skyhawk, the fighter had been
slightly redesigned around the improved hard-tech hydrogen jet turbines that
James had sold to Bell Aerospace. The fighter once waved for space use had been
dubbed the F-44 Rapier fighter and was one of two that MacDonnell Douglas and
Bell Aerospace were selling to the U.S. military for use in both space and on
earth. James for his trouble received a check from Bell every quarter that
provided quite a bit for their small station as well as their small but growing
homestead on Ganymede. Finally also in thanks the two companies sent a fighter
from each production line up for the Convention and Great Justice’s use. The
F-44 was considered a light fighter with a minimum of guns and hard points,
however it was fast, and as she was given clearance for lift from Solaris Seven
Station, Loviatar used that speed to get on her way towards her appointment on
Prometheus Forge. The email she had sent off had been replied to with a date
and a time for an appointment and as she locked the data into the flight
controls to get there, she let her mind drift back to the last time she had
asked for an appointment with A.C. Peters

2017

They met again in the KoFen simulation so that any
needs wants and desires could be simulated and mapped. "I want to have a
baby." Loviatar said without preamble.

"You and every other anthropomorphic infomorph,"
A.C. sighed, leaning back in her chair. 
"If it were easy, it'd be done by now.   Obviously, it isn't easy.  Before you mention cloning, because most do,
in that case we HAVE a full genetic profile to work with.  And then people go to genetic therapy, which
is a completely different kettle of fish. 
That is a precisely targeted exchange of certain bad genes for good
ones.  No, this issue is this."

In the air between them appeared a long,
surprisingly detailed, animated representation of a DNA molecule.

"Do you know how much of it we actually
understand?  This much," The
animation gained a bunch of multi-colored tags, connected by lines to glowing
sections of the model.  The floated
around the model like spokes on a wheel hub. Loviatar noticed that while there
were a lot of tags, the glowing sections were very small; to the point of being
near impossible to see. "What you are all asking for is a human body, made
to order.  This is not something you can
just throw the wave at and get something that works.  You have to put EFFORT into it."

A.C. flicked a finger, dismissing the DNA model. "Can
it be done?  Yes, of that I have no doubt.  Can it be done QUICKLY?  No.”

“But surely you've done work into this!"  Loviatar demanded.

"Of course, and don't call me
Shirley."  At Loviatar's unimpressed
look A.C. merely raised an eyebrow. 
"It's practically required by law to respond that way."  At her client's continued unimpressed look
the raven-haired cyberneticist shrugged eloquently.

“Ms. Peters I’m willing to do what is necessary,”
Loviatar answered flatly. “Just tell me what you need me to do and I’ll do it.”

The next day:

The sim was an exact replica of the meeting room
from yesterday, down to the slightly-too-clean smell. Loviatar hadn’t noticed
that before, mainly because the scent of the flowers in the vase was so much
better on the nose.

To her right this time was a bird perch, almost
touching the empty seat. On this was a reasonably sized blackbird.

Across from them sat a faintly tired A.C., wearing a
fairly simple hot pants and bustier combo under her white lab coat.

“So…introductions I think.” A.C. said, bringing the
attention to her. “Loviatar Bostwick, meet the Magnificent Midnight.”

Loviatar blinked.

“Now, our friendly neighborhood Blackbird here has a
request that dovetails nicely with yours Loviatar, and for similar reasons;
babies.”

“{I would have thought you got a lot of requests for
the ability to bare children.}” Midnight chirped, nocking its avatar’s head to
the side.

“Not as many as you’d think.” A.C. told the bird,
Loviatar slightly nonplussed at the clear understanding of the chirps. “Most
get along fine without going the whole hog.” She shrugged. “Not that they all
don’t WANT it. Anyway, given what you both want the best way I could see was to
create cyber-bioroid bodies. I spent most of last night doing the initial
investigation. That dead-ended so I tossed it all and went back to first
principles.”

“What.” Loviatar said dully.

“The main problem, as I told you yesterday Loviatar,
is the fact you both want human bodies made to order, with all the genetics and
such decided. What I realized by starting again from scratch was that I was
over-complicating the vast majority of the work. What you NEED is merely a
mostly flesh body of the appropriate gender and appearance. Everything else you
want would come out of that by default.”

In the air in front of them over the table a diagram
appeared.

“Basically, I’m going to start with a Julian Friez
machine. It already takes in biomass and spits out a fully formed person. Of
course I’ll modify it to make sure I’m not cloning people. Then I’ll add a
hefty chunk of Biomolding tech so the finished form is configurable. It’ll also
let me add in your current and wanted capabilities without surgery. It’s so
much simpler than cooking up a complete genetic sequencing system, growing the
zygote, and doing the implantation.”

Loviatar and Midnight looked at each other
uncertainly. Both of them had experience with people having Blue Hair Days,
Midnight had even seen Ben in the throes of a Madboy stint. But the sheer scale
of what A.C. was proposing was scaring them. This was supposed to be simpler?

Truly, this was a Mad who could compete with the
Professor.

“Unfortunately, the bodies will probably be heavy on
the handwavium though I’ll try to minimize that.”

Prometheus Forge: 2024

Loviatar
looked around the exam room not for the first time as she waited on A.C. to get
the final results of the tests that the mad had run once she had gotten there.
She had gotten dressed once again into normal clothes once the exam was
finished but since she didn’t expect the results to take this long she hadn’t
brought a book to read and dinking around on the Guest account wasn’t holding
her interest.

Finally
though, A.C. walked back into the exam room with her tablet in hand and a
contemplative look on her face.

“Well
Loviatar, it’s nice to know SOME people listen to their doctors. It does look
like we’ll have to tweak your supplements though.” The raven-haired cyborg
pulled a bottle of pills out of her lab coat’s pocket and tossed it leisurely
to her. “You’ll need to call someone out here to pick you up however, you’re
off flight status for a while.”

Loviatar
looked up from reading the label in surprise, before registering what the label
said and looking back at it in shock to double-check. It DID say ‘For pregnant
women’.

Then
with a squeal of delight she leapt at a smiling A.C. and wrapped her in a huge
hug.
Thanks to Cobalt Greywalker for writing for and the use of AC Peters(dates are a little fudgey but only because i havent nailed them down yet.)

...when we get to "tell our children when." It was 45 years ago today that man first walked on the Moon.

The obligatory (not-so-)old joke: In commemoration, the three astronauts are to be driven to the commemoration ceremony, where Armstrong and Aldrin will get out of the car and make speeches while Collins goes around the lot a few times.
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

Jim Rockford, and Bret Maverick (and NOT Mariette Hartley's husband), has died.  AFP report here: http://news.yahoo.com/maverick-star-jam ... 42420.html
And something is wrong with Yuku or my clottin' new computer's OS, because I couldn't get the link into my text as it should go. 
-----
Big Brother is watching you.  And damn, you are so bloody BORING.