 |
(there is a prequel of sorts to this, available here)
TALES OF THE LEGENDARY
Pardon Me, Epiphany In Progress
"You shall fall before our might, Lord Nemesis?" Nene read aloud, incredulously. "Just where do they GET this stuff?" She shook her head
and jotted a note -- "Get new writer" -- on the legal pad laying on the coffee table before her. Next to it a first-draft storyboard of the next
issue of the Sabres of Paragon comic was spread.
She flipped to the next panel and snorted. The new artist was good, she had to admit, but he'd... enhanced her attributes. All of the Sabres, actually.
She pondered it for a bit before deciding that even Priss didn't deserve double-D armortits, and sighed, scribbling another note: "Breast reduction
surgery, stat!"
The clock on the wall ticked forward quietly. Nene sipped at her cocoa and continued her review, marking down a few more items.
"Aunt Nene?" a timid voice said quietly from behind. Nene paused, her mug halfway to her lips, and set it back down.
"Hi Sammy." She turned to face the catgirl.
"I'm not interrupting you, am I?"
"Nope. What's up?"
Sammy scrambled up over the back of the couch and dropped down into the cushions beside Nene, drawing her knees up to her chin. Her tail curled around her
ankles, the tip of it making little twitching motions. She was wearing her usual, most comfortable outfit: a baggy sweater in red and black tiger stripes, a
miniskirt in the same style, and leather pants, which she'd claimed once held up a lot better than jeans at super-speed. Her hair was still damp, and her
fur freshly shaved; if Nene had to guess she'd have said that Sammy was prepping for a date. She usually didn't bother with that level of concern for
her appearance when all she had planned was hanging out or busting crooks.
Nene sighed to herself. Ever since the talk a few weeks ago, Sammy had alternated between bouts of more-than-usual perkiness and activity, and ... this.
Where she wasn't sullen, or depressed, or anything Nene would have expected from someone who claimed to be older but often acted like a teenager. The poor
catgirl just seemed... confused.
Despite her self-proclaimed lack of mothering instincts -- a lack which didn't bother her in the slightest, thankyouverymuch -- she was good at being a
friend, or at least liked to think so. And that, if nothing else, seemed to work in these situations. She shifted position slightly, bringing her arm up and
draping it across Sammy's shoulders in an affectionate hug.
"What's up?" she repeated, squeezing Sammy lightly. "You seem bummed."
It was then that she realized that tears were slowly tracking down Sammy's face.
"Oh, Aunt Nene," Sammy whispered, squeezing her eyes tightly shut. "What's -wrong- with me?"
Mentally, Nene shifted gears to crisis mode, as she ran through the list of possibilities. She blanched a little at the first thought that came to mind --
"Oh, god, this sounds like when Alice came into her first he--" before quashing that ruthlessly; Sammy had helped Neko bring Alice down from the
ceiling in that ... situation, having been there herself before. So that couldn't be it. She hoped that wasn't it. Dealing with the H-word -- after
that episode, even in her thoughts she censored the word, lest it slip out when Alice was around -- wasn't something she wanted to tackle again. EVER.
There was nothing -physically- wrong with her; not only was she as fit as any mutant catgirl could expect to be, but Nene made it a habit to discreetly scan
her charges every time she could. The last had been barely a day ago, and all results were normal. No, there was nothing physically wrong with her...
It was then that she recalled the specifics of the discussion from before, about someone Sammy had very obviously been smitten with. Nene had shown a great
deal of restraint, for her, and had held back from teasing the poor girl about her infatuation.
That had to be it.
"Oh, Sammy," she said softly. "What happened?"
"N-nothing, yet," Sammy replied through her crying. "We haven't even had a real date yet, I'm too afraid to ask for one. We're...
supposed to go skiing tonight, or something, I'm not sure, but it's just friends... so far..." She looked up at Nene, her face distraught.
"I... I want it to be more... but it's not -right-, is it? I... we... shouldn't be together!"
Nene closed her eyes. "Because you're already so close, you mean? Or because of... the other girlfriend?"
"What?" Sammy looked puzzled, then shook it off. "No, I haven't seen her around in a while, I don't think they were together after
all." While Nene tried to grasp that concept -- had Alice and Inyme broken up and she'd missed the memo? -- Sammy moved on. "It's... I
mean, hes a -boy-, Aunt Nene!" She leaned forward and hugged her knees, sobbing. "What's WRONG with me?!"
Nene blinked. "A boy?" she inquired, her tone evincing surprise.
"See?!" Sammy buried her face again. "There IS something wrong with me!"
"Wait, Sammy, slow down, there's nothing wrong with you," Nene said soothingly. "I'm just startled, is all. I thought you liked
Alice."
Sammy twitched, and slowly turned her face to stare at Nene in wide-eyed bafflement. For a long moment she was silent. Then she wrinkled up her nose and
grimaced. "Eww! Aunt Nene! She's, she's like, my -sister-!"
"Well, how was I supposed to know?" Nene said with mildly amused exasperation. "You were very careful not to drop an actual name, you know.
And the way you talked about -- him, I guess -- using the bow, and being a hero, and being strong... it's very much like you used to talk about
Alice." She cocked her head. "Why -didn't- you use his name?"
Sammy looked down again. "'Cause he's a -boy-," she said dejectedly, as though that explained everything.
"And this is a problem why, exactly?" Nene asked.
Sammy was quiet for a minute or two, then finally spoke, her tone combining despair and confusion. "Because I'm supposed to like girls... and... and
I don't..."
Nene squeezed her shoulder again. "Who told you that?" She shrugged. "I like boys too, you know."
Sammy scuttled out from under her arm like, well, a frightened cat, and stopped a few feet away, spinning and crouching on the floor to stare at Nene in shock.
"But... but... you and Aunt Ifrit!"
"Sammy, it's not--"
"And Alice and Inyme, and Miss Rhea and Miss Lisa, I mean sure they've got Unca Terr, but still, and Miss Valles and Miss Braende, and that other
girl, what's her name, Lynna I think, and --"
"Sammy, slow down, you need to --"
"-- Nano and Swift, I mean I don't know their real names and they never take off that armor, least not when I'm around, but c'mon, you
can't tell me it's not -obvious-, and then Miss Enynn, she likes Unca Terr but ignores every other guy out there and I've seen her hitting on girls
too, and --"
"Sammy, please!"
"-- Aunt Sylia and Aunt PRISS, and I just don't understand!" Sammy finished on a rising wail. "And it's not just them, not just you, I
mean look around, every girl I've -met- in this city likes other girls, my god have you ever just sat in the D and listened, just listened, to the
conversations going on?" Tears flowed freely and her tail lashed angrily from side to side. "And you say it's okay to like boys but nobody
does, even the ones that DO like boys STILL like girls too, look at Miss Frost, I mean, she likes EVERYBODY, and I don't know what to do and I've
TRIED, I've really tried, Aunt Nene, I've looked when everyone else is looking and I just don't GET it, it doesn't make sense, and then I look
at, at, at Arrow, and I get all tingly and it's NOT RIGHT, and there's something WRONG with me!"
Nene stared at the sobbing catgirl with a stricken expression on her face.
"And EVERY DAY, Aunt Nene, every day I'm looking around and I see all these good-looking guys, I mean, the Legendary and Riot Force and Crossroads and
the whole CITY is full of 'em, and NONE of you, not one, ever give them the time of day, and it's all so normal, I mean, that's how everyone is,
practically, and I can't help it, I can't, I even put that poster up, you know, the one Mister Superball lost and didn't want Lora'Lai to find,
and when I look at it it just doesn't interest me, I mean, not at -all-." She slowed down, then, and took off her glasses to scrub at the tears at
her face. "One of them is almost as big up-front as Aunt Ifrit, and she's just got this tiny little bikini top holding them in, and I swear, Aunt
Nene, I swear I've tried to get interested but the only thing I can think of is, my god, that's GOT to be uncomfortable."
Nene bit her lip and tried to organize her thoughts, Sammy's rapid-fire rant having effectively scrambled them. Sammy seemed to take her silence as a
sign, and looked down at the floor, picking at a loose thread in the carpeting (with her fingers, not her claws, Nene noted absently).
"I guess you're pretty disappointed in me, huh, Aunt Nene?" Sammy looked miserable. "I... I don't know what to -do-..." She
looked up again, worried hope on her face. "Maybe... maybe Aunt Sylia can, um, fix me? She's pretty smart and has that medbay and she's the one
you call when you've got big problems, right?"
Feeling her way through a minefield was not something Nene particularly enjoyed, but it was something she'd had experience with. Usually she coped by
cracking jokes. It was such an ingrained habit, in fact, that sometimes things slipped out before she meant them to.
"So... you don't want kittens someday, then?"
"WHAAAAT?!"
Nene blinked and mentally smacked herself. "Joke! Sorry, it was just a joke!" She patted the cushion beside her. "C'mon back up here.
We need to talk."
Looking somewhat doubtful and mouthing the word "Kittens?" to herself, Sammy did as she was bade and settled back down against Nene's side.
"Listen, um, you know about biology and all that, right?"
Sammy scowled faintly. "I'm not dumb, Aunt Nene. I know all about that." She blushed, then, a little, and added, "And, uh, well, you know
what Mister Superball says the internet is for."
"... I don't know if I should yell at him or thank him," Nene said. She shook her head. "Anyway. Well then, you should know that plenty
of girls -- LOTS of girls -- like guys. It's perfectly normal." Part of Nene's mind was laughing helplessly to itself in a corner, another part
was focused on the task at hand, and yet another was remarking bemusedly that she never thought, when they'd decided to unofficially adopt Sammy, that
she'd have to explain THIS particular twist on the birds and the bees.
"But that's just the internet, Aunt Nene," Sammy protested. "It's not -real-."
"It's real enough." Nene sighed. "I'm so sorry, Sammy. I didn't know you felt this way. Please believe me when I say that none
of us, not a one, will think you're wierd or broken or that there's something wrong with you, for liking boys." One side of her mouth quirked
upwards in a grin. "Remind me sometime to tell you about my first boyfriend. We, uh, liked each other. A lot."
Sammy giggled, which Nene took as an encouraging sign.
"So," Nene declared firmly, squeezing Sammy tightly, "tell me about this 'Arrow' character. What's he like?" She tilted her
head to cast a sly look at Sammy. "Is he hot? Does he make your tail twitch?"
"Aunt Nene!" Sammy said, then burst into helpless giggles.
"Well, I -told- you I liked boys too," Nene mock-grumbled. "Can't blame me for being curious...."
"I think he's pretty cute," Sammy said. "He's taller than I am, and he's got this really neat white and grey hair, and his -tail-,
wow, it's perfect, and he usually goes around in these --" and here Sammy blushed again -- "really tight pants, and no shirt..."
Nene sat and listened and responded appropriately, all the while desperately trying not to say out loud the one thing she kept thinking over and over:
How in the world am I going to explain this one to Ifrit?
Sammy vanished to her room shortly after her talk with her Aunt Nene, there to spend the rest of the afternoon in (Nene guessed) deep thought; Nene herself
tried to get back into her review and eventually gave up, staring at the wall and sipping at her cocoa until, finally, Ifrit and Alice arrived home from their
Christmas shopping trip.
Christmas wasn't exactly a -new- concept to the catgirls -- or the fey, for that matter -- but it certainly hadn't lost any of its sparkle yet, either.
Nene, who viewed the holiday with plenty of enthusiasm herself, was moderately amused by the frenzy in which the others threw themselves into the spirit of
things. They hadn't reached the decoration phase yet -- and privately, Nene had bets going with herself on how long some of the OOOH, Sparkly! decorations
would last, between Sammy, Neko, and Alice -- but they dived into the gift procurement with an almost savage glee. The hall closet was full to bursting with
presents for various people already, and each trip added a little more to the pile.
"We're home!" Ifrit smiled warmly at Nene as she and Alice came in and dropped their bags. Neko was absent; Nene wasn't sure, but she
suspected the cat was off on her own errands, as had been happening a lot lately. The snow-dusted pair shut the door, stomped off their boots, and a flare of
heat from Ifrit instantly transformed the remaining snow into steam, which streamed away into the ventilation system.
Nene grinned. "I never get tired of that trick," she observed as Ifrit laughed. The fey headed straight for the kitchen, with a cheerful
"Dinner will be ready in half an hour!" thrown over her shoulder. Nene began to rise and follow, then thought better of it -- when Ifrit was
cooking, it was best to stay out of her way unless she asked you for something.
Alice paused in sorting out the gifts they'd brought back and cocked her head curiously at Nene. "You okay?" she asked quietly. "Something
seems... off."
"I'm fine," Nene said, even as she hastily rearranged her thoughts -- hah! -- to avoid thinking about... things. Alice cocked her head the other
way, obviously catching a hint that Nene was trying to hide something, then shook her head. "A secret, hmm?"
"Yes! And don't pry, missy," Nene mock-scolded, shaking a finger at Alice with a grin.
"Perish the thought," Alice replied, heading for the closet with an armload of boxes. "You're probably just thinking about what you're
going to get Mum for Christmas anyway."
"Why is it," Nene muttered half-heartedly, "that I'm the only one in this house who can't keep you out?"
"It's not like I -try-, you know," Alice replied, sticking out her tongue. "You ... broadcast, is all. A lot." She shrugged,
smiling. "Mum, well, she's -different-, and Neko's been trained, and Sammy... it's like listening to a tape on fast-forward. She gives me a
headache, so I make sure to block her out."
"That's not nice."
"It's true, though. Believe me, you have no idea how right you were when you labeled her the HyperKitteh." Alice shut the closet door with a
bit of extra effort and glanced at Nene almost shyly. "I can block you out too, if you want me to... I like 'hearing' you, though."
Nene smiled. "Well, if you put it that way, how can I say no?" She rose to her feet and headed for the dining area. "C'mon, let's go
set the table so your Mum doesn't come after us with a flaming ladle or something."
"I love you too, dear," Ifrit called from the kitchen, causing both Nene and Alice to giggle.
Dinner was a fun affair. As they sat around the table, the presents and their intended recepients were the main topic of discussion. Conversation lagged as
everyone reached the after-meal glow stage, that short respite between hunger and having to clean up the dishes. Nene had been trying all afternoon to think
of a way to get Ifrit aside to quietly explain things when Sammy startled her by broaching the subject herself, in her typical head-down full-speed-ahead
manner.
"Hey, everyone," Sammy said, scooting her chair back from the table just a bit -- whether to give her room to stand or to run, Nene wasn't sure.
"I've got something... that I need to tell you."
Alice fiddled aimlessly with the remains of her dessert and said, "You've finally realized that 'more sugar' isn't the answer to
life's problems?"
Sammy ignored her entirely, earning a confused frown from the purple-haired catgirl.
"I..." Sammy began, the took a deep breath and plunged ahead. "I like boys!"
Alice glanced at Nene, who was suppressing giggles, then at Ifrit, who merely looked puzzled, then at the spot where Neko would usually be before visibly
remembering that she was off on other business, and finally back at Sammy. After the silence reached the awkward stage, she spoke up.
"... okay?"
Sammy deflated a bit from her rigid posture.
"That's ... very nice, Sammy," Ifrit managed, turning to regard Nene with a "Do YOU know what's going on?" look.
Sammy deflated a bit more.
"I toooolld youu soo," Nene sing-songed lightly. At the others' puzzled expressions, she leaned forward a bit and added, "See, Sammy?
Perfectly -normal-."
"Someone mind telling me what's oh my god," Alice said, turning to face Nene squarely. She winced and reached out to lay one hand over
Sammy's white-knuckled grip on the edge of the table. "Oh, Sam," she breathed.
"Still lost here," Ifrit put in.
In for a penny, Nene thought, and spoke. "Hon, Sammy didn't know it was okay to like boys." As Alice leaned over to comfort Sammy, Nene caught
Ifrit's eye and mouthed the word 'later'. Ifrit, still looking puzzled, nodded and placed her hand over Sammy's other one.
"It's okay, right?" Sammy said, looking back and forth between Alice and Ifrit with an air of desperation. "You're not ... you
don't think I'm ... weird?"
"You're plenty weird," Alice replied, "but not in THAT way."
Sammy laughed, though it could have been mistaken easily for a sob.
"So is there a boy you especially like?" Ifrit asked.
Sammy nodded. "Y-yeah." She squeezed both their hands and let go, reaching up to remove her glasses and wipe at her eyes.
When it became apparent she wasn't going to continue without prompting, Ifrit pressed the point. "So this boy you like, what's his name?"
"Uhh..."
Alice started laughing. "You've got your tail in a knot over this guy and you don't even know his -name-?"
"H-hey!"
Nene decided it was time to rescue the flustered catgirl. "You called him 'Arrow', earlier, didn't you?"
Sammy shot Nene a grateful look. "Yes, Purrfect Arrow."
Still chuckling, Alice's eyes widened slightly in recognition. "Oh, I met him." She blinked, then grinned and nudged Sammy with an elbow.
"Hey, you've got good taste."
"ALICE!"
"I call 'em like I see 'em," Alice said, smiling slyly.
"Hmph." Sammy folded her arms and turned her face away, but a smile was tugging at her lips.
"Don't you two have a date tonight?" Nene inquired innocently.
Sammy glanced at the clock and shot to her feet. "Eeep, I'll be late! Thanks, Aunt Nene!" She turned into a blur as she ran for the door.
"Don't forget your coa-- never mind," Ifrit sighed as Sammy left the house.
"So," Nene said lightly, taking up a cup of tea. "How was YOUR afternoon, hon? Mine was SWELL."
The door clicked softly and swung open on silent hinges. Sammy slipped through the gap, then shut the door quietly behind herself. She locked it again,
pocketed her key, turned, and paused.
"Hi, Aunt Nene," she said resignedly, to the darkness.
A lamp clicked on, revealing a grinning Nene in a robe. "So... how'd it go?" Then she blinked as her eyes adjusted to the light. "Wow...
new outfit?"
Sammy nodded, her eyes gleaming. "Arrow helped me get it. Ta-da!" She whirled briefly in place, showing off the fur-trimmed boots, gloves, and
stocking cap, the red velvet contrasting with the white fur and highlighting the heavy winter sweater, done in red with white tiger stripes, and the skirt with
a delicate frost pattern, also in white against red. Her legs were clad in black tights, setting off the skirt and boots with sharp, yet pleasing, lines.
"Did he help you try them on?" Nene winked.
"Aunt NENE," Sammy sighed, smiling fondly. "He was a perfect gentleman -- or maybe a Purrfect one." She laughed at her own joke, then
crossed the room in a flash of motion. Nene was startled when the catgirl jumped lightly up to the arm of the recliner and perched there, crouched on all
fours. Sammy leaned forward and touched her forehead to Nene's own, her eyes closed.
"Thank you SO much, Aunt Nene," she said quietly. "I... just, thank you."
She dropped back to the floor and rose to her feet, heading down the hallway. "Goodnight!"
Nene blinked. "Well, I guess it was, after all." She rose and headed for her own bed, and her lover. "I should see how Ifrit looks in
Christmas colors," she murmured thoughtfully, before slipping into the room and leaving the apartment silent once again.
--sofaspud
--"Listening to your kid is the audio equivalent of a Salvador Dali painting, Spud." --OpMegs
|
