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I've come to a decision
I've come to a decision
#1
Labster and I talked last night/this morning.

I've come to the decision that I'm not mentally healthy enough for something like this.  I seem to have control issues that center around how I've had so much taken away from me by other people all throughout my life.

Yes, I'm admitting it.  I'm a fucking control freak.

But I'm not saying that to ask forgiveness or anything as such, because I know that's not how real life works.  Real life doesn't want forgiveness.  It wants penance.  So instead, I'm only saying this so you understand why I've come to this decision.

I'll be leaving the project.  You guys get to own it now and do as you please.

But I don't want my character involved, even in a past-tense.  None of the stories I wrote will exist anymore.  The San Antonio residence can still exist.  But it will be a different person there, with different stories, and maybe even different residents because I know some people wanted to call dibs on others.

That's my condition.  You will have to come up with another character, maybe even more than one, to take Benjamin's place, and then retcon everything else.  No, not even filing the serial numbers off will suffice.  It has to be someone else entirely who behaves entirely different from me.

I don't even want any writing credit.  I don't want any association with this anymore because it's caused me to hurt that much.

I know you think I'm being immature, but consider this: I haven't been able to do the setting much justice with my character because I've been making him a Mary Sue.  So it's better that you have a character that is "perfectly imperfect" in his place instead.  Even if my writing has a certain style and energy that others seem to appreciate, it doesn't make up for the fact that I wrote Benjamin like that.  And apparently I'm incapable of separating myself from the SI.

Personally, I thought that was part of what made it so good.  I'm eccentric in that I like to believe that in all reality, somewhere out there is this other version of me.  And part of why I was able to hit everyone so hard in the feels is because I was able to associate that closely with my self-insert and convey the things I feel through him.

But I guess that's only good enough if most of all the other characters hate you.  Which really hurts when you associate that closely with your SI and you don't know any other way of doing it.

Please don't make this any harder on me than it is.  This is going to be like killing part of myself, and not in a healthy way.  And as things are right now?  I have too much to do, and not enough time.  And I'd rather get this done as quickly as possible.
RE: I've come to a decision
#2
The current writers, including Black Aeronaut, have discussed this announcement. We wish BA all the best in his future writing endeavours.

This leaves a vacancy in the writing team. Does anyone wish to write in the setting, with the understanding that we are now in the process of retconning many of the setting elements as requested above? This is an opportunity to "get in on the ground floor", and write some of the characters that had previously been claimed -- including the characters from Tenchi Muyo and Lyrical Nanoha.

In all fairness, we are offering Inquisitive Raven the right of first acceptance or refusal to write the Lyrical Nanoha characters.
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown
RE: I've come to a decision
#3
Okay, I'm taking this into a thread that's better suited for this kind of discussion....

(05-20-2022, 07:22 PM)robkelk Wrote:
(05-20-2022, 03:45 AM)Black Aeronaut Wrote: Okay, let me first say that I know you're running the show now.
No, I'm just the mod here. When it comes to telling the stories, I have no more power than I had a week ago.

Let me start of by saying that's utter bullshit and you know it.

And you being made into a moderator has "fuck" and "all" to do with it.

Where it's really at is contributions.  Without me here, you will be the undisputed top contributor to the project.  And what this means is that you will automatically be setting the stage upon which everyone dances.  And that's not because of something I set up.  That's just human nature.  Put a man outside a closed door like he's waiting for it to open, and a line of people will form behind him.  It's that simple.

Whether you want to admit it or not, you're going to be de-facto in charge because no one else is gonna have the same level of output as either you or me.

Next...

Rob.

I want to be clear, here.

As I said in the other thread, I did not want for there to be any left-over clues of Benjamin's existence in TNB.  It will keep the project attractive to other potential writers and cause less confusion for the readers.

It is also the most absolutely neutral path that I can think of.  You get to have TNB, more or less, however you want.  By removing my story lines, you get to fill them in with something YOU want instead.

And don't try and tell me otherwise.  I know you wanted to turn Nanoha into a full-time meganekko.  Well, guess what?  Now you can.

What is it that you want anyways?  Honestly, I have no idea what you want out of this!  You haven't even been forthcoming at all about it!

I do not want to sabotage or otherwise harm TNB.  And while I can understand that you may think that my choice to remove Benjamin and his stories from the setting is harming the project...  No.  It is the exact opposite.  I am removing any potential sources of conflict.  And while this is a daunting task to retcon everything, it's one that everyone else has agreed is worthwhile, and this because it greatly reduces the possibility any of us are gonna wind up stepping on each other's toes.

And to my knowledge?  The only one sticking to their guns about this remaining hint of Benjamin's existence is you, Rob.  The only other person that liked it was Dartz, and only because it left a path of return for me.

I have absolutely no intention of coming back.

The others may have taken a neutral stance, but they aren't exactly taking your side in this, either.  They want no part in this drama.  And to be honest?  I can't blame them.  I don't want to have to be dealing with this.

All of that said, if you want one more reason?  I'll be more than happy to give it to you.  And this one is not about me, either.

You have been on record saying that your great flaw is in making the wrong call at times.

I'm calling you out on it now: This is one of those bad calls.  I highly advise that you reevaluate your choice here.  And not because it hurts my feelings.  But because there's a fairly good chance that you're going to poison the well here.  Even if that's not your intention.
RE: I've come to a decision
#4
I am not going to reply to this point by point, except for two points listed below. I will simply sum up my overall response with a single sentence:

Black Aeronaut obviously has no idea how collaborative writing projects work in the real world.


As for the two specific points:

Quote:I know you wanted to turn Nanoha into a full-time meganekko.

Blatantly incorrect. When I re-posted that one fanart image, I said that it was not happening.

Quote:You have been on record saying that your great flaw is in making the wrong call at times.

Again, blatantly incorrect. I have said that my SI's major flaw is getting things wrong. I am not my SI.


(And I see no reason why this needs to be a sticky thread any longer. Everybody knows Black Aeronaut is leaving; keeping the thread sticky simply calls attention to that.)
--
Rob Kelk

Sticks and stones can break your bones,
But words can break your heart.
- unknown


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