...but don't.
For those of us who don't have the time or the equipment to make 'em, but want to throw ideas to those who do...
My #1 nonexistent AMV:
"A Celebration of Third Impact"--End of Eva to Melt with You by Modern English.
--Sam Ashley
"Ladies and gentlemen, you may wish to shield yourselves with your dessert menus. I might be dangerous!"

My computer at home died yesterday -- apparently the victim of a power surge/outage that the rest of the house handled without a problem (save for the ubiquitous blanked clocks). I'm going to be working as fast as I can to fix it -- I'm taking the opportunity to get the upgrade I've talked about for a while -- but in the mean time this may delay the release of Chapter 14. I'll do my best to see that it isn't delayed, but for the moment I'm expecting that it will be.
My apologies.

-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

(You never know when it might be convenient to have a pirate ship show up somewhere unusual...)
The Last Saskatchewan Pirate
The Arrogant Worms
I used to be a farmer, and I made a living fine,
I had a little stretch of land along the CP line
But time went by and though I tried, the money wasn't there
And bankers came and took my land and told me "fair is fair"
I looked for every kind of job, the answer always no
"Hire you now?" they'd always laugh, "we just let twenty go!"
The government, the promised me a measly little sum
But I've got too much pride to end up just another bum.
Then I thought, who gives a damn if all the jobs are gone?
I'm gonna be a PIRATE on the river Saskatchewan!!!
(Arrr! Arrr! Arrr! Arrr! Arrr!!)
Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Well, you'd think the local farmers would know that I'm at large
But just the other day I found an unprotected barge
I snuck up right behind them and they were none the wiser,
I rammed their ship and sank it and I stole their fertilizer!
A bridge outside of Moosejaw spans a mighty river
Farmers cross in so much fear their stomachs are a-quiver
Cause they know that TRACTOR JACK is hiding in the bay
I'll jump the bridge and knock them cold and sail off with their hay!
Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Well, Mountie Bob he chased me, he was always at my throat
He'd follow on the shoreline cause he didn't own a boat
But cutbacks were a-coming and the Mountie lost his job
And now he's sailing with us, and we call him Salty Bob!
A swingin' sword, a skull and bones and pleasant company
I never pay my income tax and screw the GST (SCREW IT!!)
Prince Albert down to Saskatoon I'm the terror of the seas
If you wanna reach the co-op, boy, you gotta get by me!
Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Arrrr, Metis! Get it? Matey? (Hey, that's Riel-ly funny! You know, Louis Riel?)
Well, Pirate life's appealing but you just don't find it here,
I've heard that in Alberta there's a band of buccaneers
They roam the Athabaska and sail to Fort McKay
And you're gonna loose your stetson if you have to pass their way!
Well, winter is a-comin' and a chill is in the breeze
My Pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze
I'll be back in springtime but now I have to go
I hear there's lots of plundering down in New Mexico!
Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores...

As Bob suggested moving this speculation here...
*** major Magic Knight Rayearth spoiler, below ***
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The basic premise of MKR is that the maintainer of the world that the Knights have to save has made the really major error of falling in love with her High Priest; definately a case of falling in love with your own creation.
The solution of the series is to get three Japanese teenagers (female, of course), drag them into this world, train them up into magical warriors, and then make them into murderers by tricking them into killing the world maintainer.
This supposed gets her out of the problem that she can't (directly) suicide, and saves the world from destruction by her mis-placed passion, so she can presumably be replaced by someone else who is not allowed love.
Doug might get involved in this before the Knights are summoned (by the wizard?), and try and figure a way that the world maintainer can function while still feeling love. My suggestion in the other thread was that Doug persuade her to Breakpoint the reality, freeze it, then go off to some other world(s) in search of a solution.
I thought this might be fun...
And, allows the possibility of all sorts of cross-over action!
--
"It is the business of the future to be dangerous" - Hawkwind

Okay, I've been busy. Added links for the Farm Film Report ("It blowed up real good!") including sound files, and a correction to the Don Pardo entry which includes a link to the obituary of Rod Roddy.

-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

I had visions, I was in them,
I was looking into the mirror
To see a little bit clearer
The rotteness and evil in me.
Fingertips have memories,
I can't forget the curves of your body,
And when I feel a bit naughty,
I run it up the flagpole and see
Who salutes but no one ever does.
Oh, I'm not sick, but I'm not well,
And I'm so hot, cause I'm in hell...
Been around the world and found
That only stupid people are breeding,
The cretins cloning and feeding,
And I don't even own a TV.
Put me in the hospital for nerves,
And then they had to commit me,
You told them all I was crazy,
They cut off my legs, now I'm an amputee, God damn you...
I'm not sick, but I'm not well,
And I'm so hot, cause I'm in hell.
I'm not sick, but I'm not well,
And it's a sin, to live so well...
I wanna publish 'zines,
And rage against machines,
I wanna pierce my tongue,
It doesn't hurt it feels fine,
I like to turn off time,
And kill my mind,
Kill my mind,
Mind.....
Paranoia, paranoia,
Everbody's coming to get me,
Just say you never met me,
I'm runnin' underground with the moles, diggin' holes...
Hear the voices in my head,
I swear to God it sounds like they're snoring,
But if you're bored then you're boring,
The agony and the irony, they're killing me,
Whoa...
I'm not sick, but I'm not well,
And I'm so hot, cause I'm in hell.
I'm not sick, but I'm not well,
And it's a sin, to live this well...
-- Harvey Danger, Flagpole Sitta
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

This really isn't a suggestion for a power song, but rather a side-thread to the "Some Random Powers" topic; posting these lyrics there was very slightly off-topic, so I put them in their own thread.

The Illuminati University Alma Mater 11-16-90
by John M. Ford
Okay, fellow Illuminates, here it is:
THE ILLUMINATI UNIVERSITY THEME SONG
(to the tune of the Tiny Toon Adventures theme)
We deal in
Illusion
Hypnosis and confusion
And this institution has its eye on all below
A liberal college
Of weird forbidden knowledge
Our classes cover everything Man Wasn't Meant to Know
Behold the ancient buildings where our scholars work and dwell
They move when no one's looking and they all connect to Hell
Through these eldritch portals
We don't get many mortals
And everything considered, guess it's just as well
Illuminated attitudes pervade our faculty
From Evil Stevie's Library to Arcane R & D
Here man and cetacean
Serve up an education
In Space and Time Dilation
And Paradoxes too
Experimentation
With genes and radiation
Makes each graduation
A triumph for the few
(repeat tune of last verse)
The Archdean is an angel and the Art Curator's mad
And here you need a parachute to go through Drop and Add
There's placement and pretest
In Science Weird and Weirdest
Our annual Samhainfest
And Necronomicomp
Take Ethics for Tyrants
Or Laboratory Violence
Call Military Science
The Ogre's on the stomp
We're deep and
We're dotty
At dear Illuminati
The Higher Mystic Institute for one and all
(Admissions down the hall.)

-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

Okay, so Monday I'm listening to one of my mix CDs in the car, this one being the third disc I've made that's full of anime theme music and J-Pop. And the first track is the opening theme to Magic Knight Rayearth. Now, I have absolutely no intention of writing a Step in that world -- the plot is too structured for Doug to be able to do anything useful there -- but while listening to the song, I had a little "what if" moment.
(If you're unfamiliar with MKR, the names won't mean anything to you, but that's not necessary for enjoying this little bit.)
So I ended up envisioning Doug on his motorcycle, tearing through the Forest full of monsters from early in the series. Fuu and Umi are sitting behind him, fending off creatures from right and left, respectively. And Hikaru is perched somehow between the handlebars, handling the critters coming from straight on.
Now, I was envisioning this straight -- a serious scene of danger and the response thereto. Except, suddenly, the Doug part of my mind spoke up and interjected this line of dialogue into what was supposed to be oh-so-dramatic:
"Hikaru, while I am second to none in my appreciation of the teenage female derriere, and while yours is a truly extraordinary example of the species, would you please keep your butt out of my face while I'm driving?"
And that was it for any serious consideration.


-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

The final scene of the chapter is giving me some problems, but I'm hoping to have it thrashed into acceptable shape by the end of the week still. If not then, then by Monday. I am still shooting for a November 7 release; I won't push that date back unless my muse gets really truculent.

-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

Here are some random not very usefull powers and the odd songs that might bring them. I am afraid, that I have been given this way too much thought.
"Wouldn't it be good" by Nic Kershaw
Wouldn't it be good to be in your shoes, even if it was for just one day
Bodyswap. Traded places with someone for 24-hours. Subject has to be willing or at least jealous enough to wish to be in Doug's place on some level.
"Weather With You" by Crowded House
Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
localized weather control. A bubble of air surrounds Doug that will stay the same temperatur, humidity and so on no matter where he goes. Walk out a house and stay room temperatur even in hottest summer or coldest winter. Might also work for short space-walks without a spacesuit.
"Invisible Man" by Queen
Incredible how you can see right through me
I'm the invisible man I'm the invisible man
It's criminal how I can see right through you
Invisibility and X-Ray visions. Not paticularly usefull when he already has non-corp and other powers.

"Kung-Fu Fighting" by Carl Douglas
Everybody was kung-fu fighting
Hand-combat boost Area effect. Everyone around Doug suddenly gains advanced martial-arts abilities for the duration of the song. Useless for Doug himself, as he already is quite good at hand to hand combat. Could turn a group of innocent bystanders or noncombatants into people who can take care of themselves while he goes after the main problem. It would only be usefull when he can't get them out, the enemy is not to powerfull and not human enough to be also boosted by the song. Might also be usefull if he was forced to fight alongside some powerfull but untrained allies (like say Sailor-Senshi).
"Wind of Change" by the Scorpions
A rain of coins, silly. Ignoring the actual meaning of the lyrics and concentraiting on the title-phrase, the power creates a small shower of random coins that will disappear after the end of the song. Not paticularly usefull for anything other than a quick diversion or scamming automated vendors.

Edited to actually turn on the ezCodes I used everywhere. That will teach me to ignore the preview option.