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Dearly Departed of 2025
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Fic Update Thread 58: the...
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Crossovers that should be...
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Image-Dump Thread 30
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Fanfic Recommendations: T...
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The Dead Dove Locker -- "...
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Video Madness XII
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Isekai by Moonlight
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Even more oddities spotte...
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All The Tropes Wiki Proje...
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| Really messed up Anime |
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Posted by: Jinx999 - 03-11-2005, 01:40 PM - Forum: Future Steps
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What would happen if Doug ended up in some really screwed up anime world? I'm not talking wacky screwed up, I'm talking truly disturbing places.
Elfen Lied? Sadistic experiments on cute psychopathic killers?
Gantz? 'Rescued' random strangers sent on bizarre missions to kill aliens, apparently as some kind of game. Average fatality rate - over 75% per mission.
Gunslinger Girl? Brainwashed adolescent girls turned into cyborg assassins.
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| Possible Song |
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Posted by: Jervic - 03-10-2005, 12:51 PM - Forum: Drunkard's Walk VI: Angel Baby
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I was listening to some of my old CD's, and for some reason this song made me think of Asuka.. especially late in the series.
Proud swagger out of the school yard
Waiting for the world's applause
Rebel without a conscience
Martyr without a cause
Static on your frequency
Electrical storm in your veins
Raging at unreachable glory
Straining at invisible chains
And now you're trembling on a rocky ledge
Staring down into a heartless sea
Can't face life on a razor's edge
Nothing's what you thought it would be
All of us get lost in the darkness
Dreamers learn to steer by the stars
All of us do time in the gutter
Dreamers turn to look at the cars
Turn around and turn around and turn around
Turn around and walk the razor's edge
Don't turn your back
And slam the door on me
It's not as if this barricade
Blocks the only road
It's not as if you're all alone
In wanting to explode
Someone set a bad example
Made surrender seem all right
The act of a noble warrior
Who lost the will to fight
And now you're trembling on a rocky ledge
Staring down into a heartless sea
Done with life on a razor's edge
Nothing's what you thought it would be
No hero in your tragedy
No daring in your escape
No salutes for your surrender
Nothing noble in your fate
Christ, what have you done?
--"The Pass" Presto Rush
mmmm... I like this song.
--Jervic
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| Song of the Day, 8 March 2005 |
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Posted by: Bob Schroeck - 03-08-2005, 05:00 PM - Forum: Drunkard's Walk VI: Angel Baby
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She's into superstition
Black cats and voodoo dolls
I feel a premonition
That girl's gonna make me fall
She's into new sensation
New kicks and candle light
She's got a new addiction
For every day and night
She'll make you take your clothes off
And go dancing in the rain
She'll make you live the crazy life
Or she'll take away your pain
Like a bullet to your brain
Upside inside out
She's living la Vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Living la Vida loca
Her lips are devil red
And her skins the color mocha
She will wear you out
Living la Vida loca
Living la vida loca
Woke up in New York City
In a funky cheap motel
She took my heart and she took my money
She must of slipped me a sleeping pill
She never drinks the water
Makes you order French Champaign
And once you had a taste of her
You'll never be the same
She'll make you go insane
Upside inside out
She's living la Vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Living la Vida loca
Her lips are devil red
And her skins the color mocha
She will wear you out
Living la Vida loca
Living la vida loca
She'll make you take your clothes off
And go dancing in the rain
She'll make you live the crazy life
Or she'll take away your pain
Like a bullet to your brain
Upside inside out
Living la Vida loca
She'll push and pull you down
Living la Vida loca
Her lips are devil red
And her skins the color mocha
She will wear you out
Living la Vida loca
Living la Vida loca
Living la vida loca
-- Ricky Martin, Livin' La Vida Loca
-- Bob
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Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.
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| This is probably a repost... |
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Posted by: Bob Schroeck - 03-02-2005, 10:10 PM - Forum: Drunkard's Walk VIII: Harry Potter and the Man from Otherearth
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I'm pretty damned sure I posted this scene once before as a teaser, but for the life of me I cannot find it on the board. This is in response to the topic coming up in the "A Little Treat" thread -- Doug's first day teaching DADA at Hogwart's:
"Good morning, class," the traveler said once everyone hadsettled down. "My name is Colonel Douglas Sangnoir, and I amyour new instructor in the Defense Against The Dark Arts. Assome of you may already know, I am a native of another universeentirely. Those of you with so-called 'Muggle' backgrounds willbe familiar with the concept of the 'superhero.' My world lacksthat word, but I have been assured that I am one. As a result, Ipossess perspectives and experiences that Headmaster Dumbledorethinks you can make use of." He paused to survey the class. "Iagree. For a magically-active Earth, your world is a relativelycalm and peaceful one, and as a result, you are..." He smiled."Well, if I were instructing a band of new recruits, I'd bellowin your faces that you were soft and weak, drill sergeant-style."A few members of the class laughed nervously. Colonel Sangnoirwalked around to the front of the table next to the lectern andseated himself on it with a hop. With another smile heacknowledged the laughter. "What you are, though, is remarkablyprivileged. Most worlds with as much magic as yours faceterrible threats -- active demonic infiltration, eldritchcreatures the sight of whom can drive men mad, hundred-metermonsters strolling through cities. My own home world, which isrelatively weak in magic, was the target of a massive, concertedinvasion of vampires that we only barely fought off."Not a sound could be heard through the classroom now, and Harryshivered at the thought of an army of vampires slowly taking overthe world. He shuddered at the sudden image of the Dursleysturned into vampires. Lord Voldemort seemed almost comfortableand friendly in comparison.Sensing the mood of the class, Colonel Sangnoir nodded gravely."It was quite touch-and-go for a while, and my wife was almostturned into a vampire in the process. But we won, finally. Idon't want to get into it right now, but later in the term Ipromise I'll tell you something about that campaign." He hoppedoff the table again. "Which probably has you all wondering,what's this guy going to teach us, right?"A murmur of assent swept through the class, and Harry foundhimself contributing to it. A quick glance to either side showednot only Hermione but Ron as well watching the Colonel with wide,interested eyes.The Colonel stepped around the table, picked up a piece of chalk,and stood at the board. "What we're going to cover this term arethese points -- you might want to note them down, as they're keyconcepts," he noted, at which two dozen pencils hovered over twodozen notebooks. "First, the nature of evil. Second, evil andmagic. Thirdly, strategy and tactics." He scrawled each topicon the board in an unrestrained hand, underlining each one, thenturned back to face them. "This is *not* going to be a 'recipeclass'. You are not going to learn a list of 'if-thens' here --'if confronted by a blue-tailed eyebiter, then throw salt at it.'You are going to learn about the nature of evil, how it works,how it thinks, why it does what it does. You are going to learnhow to identify it at work even when it's disguised, how to spotits tools and deflect or break them. When it comes specificallyto evil magic, you will not learn just simple countercharms. Youwill learn how defend against any evil magic, without knowingwhat it is. You will gain reflexes against it, become able toreact and defend before you consciously know you've beenattacked. If I can, I will even teach you how to transmute evilmagic -- which is a quick way of saying that you'll learn how tosteal its magical energy to fuel your own spells while justincidentally killing it in the process." He leaned forward andraked his eyes over each and every one of them in the class. "Iwill be teaching you techniques developed by mages in worldswhere every single day is a struggle simply to survive againstlegions of sorcerous monsters. I will teach you not only how todefend against evil, but how to hunt it down and destroy it."The room was absolutely silent. Then a single voice in the backranks whispered loudly, "Cor! All that in one term?" A wave oflaughter crashed over the room, releasing the tension that hadgrown during the Colonel's monologue. Even the Colonel himselflaughed, Harry noted with some relief."I'll try, at least," he said, still chuckling. "Which means weneed to get started right away." He clapped his hands together,raising a small cloud of chalk dust. "Right! Before you candefend against evil, you must be able to identify it. So. Whatis evil? Define it please..." He searched through the students,ignoring Hermione's vigorously-waving hand. "...Mister Malfoy."Draco Malfoy smirked. "The opposite of good, sir," he answered,the barest hint of mockery in his voice.Colonel Sangnoir -- Harry couldn't imagine calling him"Professor" -- apparently heard the barely-there mocking tone,and raised one eyebrow. "I see we're a sophist, Mister Malfoy.That was a classic no-answer answer. While technically correct,it is devoid of meaning and thus unacceptable." His jovial tonesuddenly chilled. "Smart aleck responses will gain you no favorsin this class, Mister Malfoy. Minus five points to HouseSlytherin."The Slytherins in the class fumed, while the other studentsgiggled, murmured and chuckled among themselves. Behind hisglasses, Harry blinked. He glanced at the Slytherin boy.Malfoy's usual reserve cracked and a look of pure fury blazedacross his face for a moment; then he noticed Harry watching himand recomposed himself, and returned Harry's interest with abaleful, reptilian stare. Harry snorted and returned hisattention to the instructor.The Colonel's voice had gone back to being friendly. "You'llfind I'm easy to get along with, if you understand this: I amhere to teach you things that will save your lives, the lives ofyour loved ones, and possibly the lives of untold innocents. ButI have a limited amount of time in which to do so. I don't mindwrong answers, if they're sincerely offered. I *do* minddisruptive behavior, sniping at myself or other students, and badattitudes. For those of you who can't think of it any other way,consider this: I could easily tutor five or six promisingstudents instead of teaching an open class. If an atmospheredevelops that makes this class impossible, then I *will* switchto tutoring. That will mean the students I select will have anadvantage -- one literally unavailable elsewhere in this universe-- over those who are denied the tutoring." His voice went coldagain, and Harry realized that his eyes rested solely on DracoMalfoy. "Do I make myself understood?""Yes, sir," the class replied in a chorus of desultory murmurs."Good. Now, where were we? Right. The definition of evil.Does anyone else have any *useful* ideas?"Hermione's hand was waving so hard that Harry thought it coulddrive a windmill."Miss Granger?"Hermione stood up. "Evil is selfishness," she said primly.Colonel Sangnoir nodded. "Good. Very good. Anyone else?""Bullies!""Murderers!""People who hate!"The whole class began shouting out all manner of despicablebehaviors, as Colonel Sangnoir nodded. Harry kept silent,thinking about the evil he come face to face with over the pastfew years, and tried to figure out if there were a common elementto it all. Next to him, Hermione hmphed in annoyance as theanswers offered began to dip into the trivial and silly."Objects," Harry suddenly blurted."What was that, Mister..." Colonel Sangnoir consulted theseating chart on the lectern. "Mister Potter?"Harry started; he hadn't realized he'd spoken aloud. He tried toignore the flush of embarassment he felt climbing up his face."Um. Objects, sir. All the really evil people I've ever mettreated people like... like *things* you could use up and throwout without a care."A broad smile broke across the Colonel's face. "Exactly. Onekey identifying characteristic of evil is that it sees all otherliving creatures -- sentient beings or not -- as objects to use,abuse, and discard in order to achieve its goals. Empathy isalien to it; it has no care for others' feelings, except when itdelights in their manipulation. Most of the other attributes theclass was suggesting, especially Miss Granger's suggestion, are*symptoms* of evil. Very good, Mister Potter. Five pointsto..." He scrabbled for the seating chart again. "What's yourhouse, Mister Potter?""Gryffindor, sir." Harry couldn't help but smile slightly; Ronand Hermione were less restrained."Right. Five points to Gryffindor." He scratched a few lines onthe seating chart with a handy pencil, then looked back up."There is another key attribute of evil. Any guesses?"The room grew silent as thirty-five youthful faces scowled inintense concentration. Harry, without realizing it, was amongthem. He dug through his memories of his confrontations withLord Voldemort in his various guises, from the youthful TomRiddle to the murderer of his parents whom he could not reallyremember, and tried to find something in common among all ofthem."Anyone?" the Colonel asked of the quiet classroom.Harry bit his lip as he thought of a possibility. Hesitantly, heraised his hand."Mr. Potter?" The Colonel's tone seemed slightly amused, but notmocking.Harry swallowed. His answer didn't seem to make sense, but itfit the facts... "Evil... it seems to think it's *Good*, sir."Another brilliant smile broke across the teacher's face and henodded approvingly. "Very good, Mr. Potter." He turned hisattention on the rest of the class. "Evil -- *real* Evil -- isconvinced it is Good. It is, in fact, *far* more certain that itis Good than Good is -- and that's how you can often tell thedifference. Good doubts itself -- it's a necessary mechanismthat *keeps* it Good. Evil never doubts itself, its motives orits methods. It deludes itself, or lets itself be easily deludedby others, that it is always in the right. It is alwaysconvinced that what it does is Good. Of course, it usuallyredefines 'Good' to mean 'what *it* wants'."He sat back down on the edge of the table. "If you ever havedoubts about the rightness of a course you have set yourself on,you are at the very least redeemable. Only the irredeemably evilare ever *absolutely* sure of their actions."
Let me just note that I don't have much of a plot to hang this on yet, just a few vague ideas. This and the other material I have was mostly written before "Goblet of Fire" came out, and that book and "Order of the Phoenix" have obsoleted some of the cool and kooky stuff I came up with. (For instance, Doug was initially suspicious that Narcissa Malfoy was actually Lucius Malfoy's anima spun off as a separate being, the better to "preserve the purity of the bloodline", but that was before we found out her actual history.)
I do know that when/if I actually write this, I am going to have to restrain myself from excessive Malfoy-bashing. I have this terrible desire to find a place where Doug can get away with calling father and son "Luscious" and "Dorko", and I have the following two lines just looking for places to be inserted:
"Mister Malfoy." I rubbed my eyes. "Tell me, Mister Malfoy, are you suicidal, or merely a congenital idiot?""Mister Malfoy. Formenting trouble again, I see. Don't you have something better you could be doing, like, I don't know, torturing kittens or practicing how to grovel before a dark lord?"-- Bob
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Chaos isn't really chaos if it isn't Lawful part of the time.
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| If Doug were was a family man... |
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Posted by: HoagieOfDoom - 02-22-2005, 07:01 AM - Forum: General DW Chatter
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...then he would probably be like this.*********
Actually, Ive been thinking about taking up judo again.
Sylia mulled that over and remarked, Handy skill to have. Always room for growth. But no guarantee of the sexy women. I pass.
- Bubblegum Crisis Post 2040 Files, by P. Kristen Enos
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| It's All Fun & Games dept. |
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Posted by: classicdrogn - 02-21-2005, 05:31 PM - Forum: General DW Chatter
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1000 Blank White Cardslooks like being the first collectable card game I'd actually like to play.
more information and many more cards as examples.
- CD
Edit: This was supposed to be in General/General - could some one with mod authority move it for me?How many times have you stared mournfully into the coleslaw and thought "Gee, I wish I was a cabbage."
SERVO: Loook *deeeeply* into my eyes... Tell me, what do you see?
CROW: (hypnotized) A twisted man who wants to inflict his pain upon others.
--
"Anko, what you do in your free time is your own choice. Use it wisely. And if you do not use it wisely, make sure you thoroughly enjoy whatever unwise thing you are doing." - HymnOfRagnorok as Orochimaru at SpaceBattles
woot Med. Eng., verb, 1st & 3rd pers. prsnt. sg. know, knows
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| Silly little question. |
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Posted by: blob - 02-21-2005, 12:27 AM - Forum: General DW Chatter
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Does Doug have a song that creates a simulacrum of Jesus?
That could be fun if he ever needs to mess with some radical Christians' heads. *g*What if: Chibi Usa, Veteran Speznas Ninja Commando From Hell(tm)?
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| It's time to run like hell... |
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Posted by: SkyeFire - 02-20-2005, 08:08 AM - Forum: Future Steps
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Over in the "Game" forum, Rob Kelk mentioned Doug as a living Infinite Improbability Drive. And that pushed my buttons....
The Hitchhiker's Guide Step: These People Are Too Weird for ME!
SEE Doug arrive in Merry Ol' England *just* in time to watch it blow up.
WATCH Doug's field interact with the Heart of Gold's IID -- safe distance? No such thing....
LISTEN to Doug out-angst Marvin the Paranoid Android.
CRINGE as Doug, exposed to Vogon poetry, puts on his Bugs Bunny hat and counterattacks... *in kind.*
CHEER when Doug discovers that the Intergalactic Society of Shrinks, Lawyers, and Politicians are the ones responsible for getting Earth blow up... and decides to take it just a *bit* personally.
(Okay, in canon it was just the Srhinks, IIRC. But c'mon, you think the lawyers *wouldn't* get in on that action?)
LAUGH HYSTERICALLY as Doug is mistaken for the Great Arkelsneezer, and nearly triggers The Coming Of The Great White Handkerchief by accident.
CHUCKLE as Doug eats a sumptuous meal at Millways -- and ends up working his bill of in the kitchen.
PLUG YOUR EARS as Doug becomes the *only* Disaster Area roadie to survive more than one concert.
SHIVER WITH ANTICI................PATION when Doug discovers Magraethea and the Earth mkII, and hatches a daring plan...
And CLOSE YOUR BROWSER WINDOW before I come up with anything even *more* inane......
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| Knight Moves |
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Posted by: Foxboy - 02-18-2005, 07:29 PM - Forum: Future Steps
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Knight Rider, anyone?
"Pay no attention to the man behind the counter spouting random series/ movies/ novels."
''We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat
them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.''
-- James Nicoll
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![[Image: image,Sukael,white,black.png]](http://www.sloganizer.net/en/image,Sukael,white,black.png)
