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  Filk!
Posted by: ECSNorway - 05-31-2010, 04:55 PM - Forum: General Chatter - Replies (4)

Just received this from Prometheus Music. They've authorized posting on YouTube of a large variety of out-of-print tracks, including a lot of Julia Ecklar's early work.
Start here: http://www.youtube.com/user/weyrdmusicman
And to turn them into mp3's, go here: http://www.listentoyoutube.com/index.php
--
Sucrose Octanitrate.
Proof positive that with sufficient motivation, you can make anything explode.

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  snails on meth (and coke)!
Posted by: Sweno - 05-31-2010, 12:02 AM - Forum: General Chatter - Replies (1)

This is almost as cool as weasels on crack, with the added benefit of it actually being done (i have yet to hear about science experiments where they give drugs to Mustelidaes)

In an effort to study how drugs affect memory, scientists have been drugging snails with methamphetamine and cocaine.

Why snails? because they have a much simpler neural network, and peta doesn't raise a fit when you drug them and poke them with sticks. Ok, I'm not so sure about the last part.

I fully expect to see this as a Ig Noble nominee.

Found via arstechnica.
-Terry
-----
"so listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing to happen to you today"
TF2: Spy

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  "Does Rhodey look different to you?"
Posted by: OpMegs - 05-30-2010, 01:22 PM - Forum: General Chatter - Replies (1)

The 100th video of "I'm A Marvel and I'm a DC" just couldn't be normal, so...it wasn't.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyPh8aIdR-4

It really, really wouldn't have worked without it being Tony.
---
"Oh, silver blade, forged in the depths of the beyond. Heed my summons and purge those who stand in my way. Lay
waste."

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  Report on live-action Yamato movie
Posted by: Logan Darklighter - 05-30-2010, 07:41 AM - Forum: General Chatter - Replies (1)

Exactly what it says on the tin. This shit is looking pretty awesome.

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  The "Motivational Posters" meme is still alive?
Posted by: robkelk - 05-30-2010, 04:21 AM - Forum: General Chatter - Replies (2)

Apparently so - this one was recommended over on the SJGames Forums today.

[Image: 124891178246.jpg]

(If that doesn't show up, surf to http://7chan.org/tg/src/124891178246.jpg ...)
--
Rob Kelk
"Governments have no right to question the loyalty of those who oppose
them. Adversaries remain citizens of the same state, common subjects of
the same sovereign, servants of the same law."

- Michael Ignatieff, addressing Stanford University in 2012

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  Death man! It's like so...man..he get inside your head... he looks at you and says whacked out things!
Posted by: Rev Dark - 05-29-2010, 07:55 PM - Forum: General Chatter - No Replies

Dennis Hopper.  Dead.  Cancer.  Prostate cancer.
Fuck.  While not my favorite actor, Hopper's manic, feverish, body language and delivery had me hooked from Apocalypse Now, to Blue Velvet; and even as he aged, his turns as elder statesman nutjobs were always worth the time to watch.
Gary Coleman.  Also dead.  Different Stroke.  Natural.  Oddly enough this is rare for the short in Hollywood (Why not Tom Cruise! Why! Why!) as suicide is normally the way, from little Herve to manic midget David Rappaport (in his own words; not the shortest man in the world, but pretty fucking close); the short tend to take their own lives in Hollywood (okay - Coleman did try several times.)  Don't know how to feel about it.  I watched the show as a kid.  Melancholy.  That is about all.  Though one can smile at the thought of Conrad Bain and Todd Bridges pointing fingers at each other and silently mouthing 'next.'

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  [RFC][Ship/Station] The Forge's new neighbour
Posted by: Cobalt Greywalker - 05-29-2010, 04:29 PM - Forum: Fenspace - Replies (10)

Hey gang, been working on this for a while (mainly since I included it on the Prometheus Forge template) and I'd like some feedback. It's all wiki'd as well.



{{Shipbox
|shipname = Ki
|shipimage =
|caption =
|hull = Dyson Tree (Comet Nucleus)
|length = 3.2 km (1.2 km for comet nucleus, plus 2 km for trunks)
|width = 0.95 km
|height = 1.01 km
|mass =
|drivetype = Biological Solar/Magnetic Sail ([[Engine_Technology#Slower_Than_Light|Speed])
|driverating = Max velocity 0.005c
|weapons = Biological Lasers
Magnetic grapples.
|manufacturer = ACP Engineering Company
|owner = ACP Engineering Company
|flag = [[Prometheus Forge]
|faction = None
|registry = ACP-T-001
|datelaunched = September 2013
|purpose = Prototype, with Food Production, Botany Lab, and others as needed
|crew = Varies, but mostly drones
|auxvehicles = Varies
|status = '''Active'''
}}
{{planetbox
|name=Ki
|image=
|orbit= Same as [[Prometheus Forge]
|diameter= 3.2 km (1.2 km for comet nucleus, plus 2 km for trunks)
|gravity=Negligible
|year=
|day=
|temp=
|atmosphere=None
|waterice=92%
|population=Varies
|political= [[Fenspace Convention]
|government=[[Prometheus Forge]
|capital=N/A
}}

''Created By: [[User:Cobalt Greywalker|Cobalt Greywalker]''

Created as a second attempt by [[Greenpeace Crolis|Greenpeace], Ki grew far faster that that previous attempt. This was in part because Greenpeace had worked out some of the kinks, and in part by her having a small comet nucleus pulled in from the Kuiper Belt to plant it on.[[Eddie] was planning on a comet mining expedition anyway, this just meant he was inspired to move several to [[Prometheus Forge] space. The sunshades were a bit overkill though.

Greenpeace's plans for brother and sister Trees for Ki have been put on hold, as Ki itself provides immense amounts of space and seems to have some sort of awareness (which means [[A.C. Peters|A.C.] is reluctant to allocate further resources to the construction of more).

Ki's existence was not widely known until after the Boskone War, as it was placed 3000 KM down-orbit of Prometheus Forge to keep it out of the way. Afterwards it moved to its current station 50 KM away.

== Appearance ==
A 1.2x0.95x1.01km comet nucleus with 3 huge tree trunks growing out of it (2km tall by 330m wide at 14 May 2014.The branches triple the total width to get enough light to the leaves of the trunks.)

== Known Vehicle Quirks ==
* ''OK, this is weird:'' As a living organism, Ki tends to respond to things that those inside it don't or can't notice. This usually results in odd changes to the interior environment. While unsettling to people inside, it causes unusual adaptations to the various plants growing inside.
* ''What the? Where'd ''that'' come from?:'' Something of a corollary to the above quirk, furniture (all wooden, natch) tends to appear and disappear as necessary. And equipment tends to integrate '''itself''' into the structure if left alone for more than a few minutes.

* ''Bio-what?:'' Ki has, or seems to be developing, biological versions of some technologies. This includes the bio-lasers and carbon-nanotube based magnetic grapples it uses for defence, the organic fibre optical conduits for data transmission and lighting, and the lift tubes for internal transport.

== Trivia ==
* Ki shows signs of an awareness that, while not sapience, is similar but unlike the sentience of small animals. As such, Greenpeace (at A.C.'s urging) is careful of who she introduces to the Dyson Tree.

* The first indication of the inbuilt drive system was when Ki went off and grabbed a small (200 metre-ish) rock. When the [[White Stallion] caught up, most of the rock had been absorbed for additional nutrients.

== Notes ==

{{Prometheus_Forge}}
{{places}}
{{spacecraft}}
[[Category:Spacecraft]
[[Category:Space stations]
[[CategoryTonguelaces in Fenspace]
[[Category:Main Belt]

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  Riot Force Reports: Broken Refections
Posted by: dark seraph - 05-29-2010, 08:10 AM - Forum: The Legendary - No Replies

Talos Island.

 

Today had been a shitty day for Dark Seraph, first a Federal agent had tried to arrest him fro a string of crimes through the Rocky Mountains, it was all he could do not to punch the agent as he listed them, rape, murder, arson, the list went on and on. Agent Nance was about ready to cuff him when he got a call that apparently He was attacking the Faultline dam.

 

The next few hours had been one confusing turn after another, meeting an other alternate dimension version of his self.  Chasing his evil clone through the sewers, all the time having his double giving him details of his crimes before escaping then finally finding out the truth that his evil twin was a created by the fifth column.

 

Now he was running through an abandoned fifth base, the intercom crackling to life as his "evil" clone decided to taunt him with more of his exploits. He could fell rage growing as he heard each one.

 

"And then there was that orphanage, can't quite remember the name of the town it was in... oh man that was such fun. I mean... you should of heard how they Begged me to stop... but the thing with kids, their just so frail, one squeeze and pop! Their gone.

 

Oh, and the chick that ran the show... she just wouldn't shut the up. Keep going on and on about me being a monster... and that as a hero I shouldn't act like that, geeze. Couldn't she See what I was doing... in a way I was being Heroic, I saved each child from the bleak depressing madness of this world."

 

Seraph ran around the corner, seeing several freaks blocking his way, with out even pausing he unleashed a torrent of energy down that hall, sending them flying as it exploded in a blast of crimson energy. Before they could recover he was on them, a blur of rage as he took them apart.

 

Standing over them he added Zig tags as an after thought, before heading deeper into the base. The com crackled as his clone spoke again. "That was great... now I see where I get all this rage from, but where was I... oh that's right, the orphanage."

 

"Now that chick in charge... she didn't like what I was doing, so she stabbed me with a fork... can you believe that... a Fork! Well... you've read the bible right... and eye for an eye. So I took a knife and gave he one hell of a smile, now... now matter how bleak life gets... no mater how fucked up it is... she's always smiling!"

 

Seraph blasted down a door and saw his clone happily speaking in to a microphone, turn to face him, a twisted grin on his face. "Ahh, there you are. Love what you did with the freaks, didn't know they could bend quite like that."

 

He let out a roar of rage as charged at his doppelganger, smashing him to the ground. The clone swung wildly, cracking his jaw and sending him tumbling away. Getting to his feet his clone dusted himself off. "How rude, don't you know you never interrupt a villain mid rant?" standing up he sent a blast of arcane energy at him. "Now, what to do with you? Maybe I can kill you?"

 

Jumping across the room he gave Seraph a kick to the ribs. "Hey, if I do that, maybe I can take your life? Wonder what that be like?" Grinning he looked down at him kicking him again. "Hm, that might be fun, pretending to be you, getting close to your loved ones, then slowly destroying each of their lives."

 

He pulled his leg back to kick Seraph again, but was sent flying across the room with a blast of rust red energy. The double got to his feet and grinned at Seraph. "Yes... that's it... now it's time for some fun." He pulled out a switch blade. "Come on then, bring it... unless you want me to put a smile on your family-." He was cut off as Seraph blasted him again, before grabbing him and slamming him into the wall. The crimson energy practically boiling off him.

 

Seraphs voice came in a furious hiss. "Don't you even dare."

 

"You think you can stop me? I've already made one of the most hated men around, I've won as far as I'm concerned and there is nothing you can do to make things right."

 

Seraph gritted his teeth and smashed him in the face, the smell of burning flesh filling the air as his fist connected. The clone blinked in surprise before grinning, blood trickling from the corner of his mouth. "Ooooh, you gonna break your little rule... what is it now? No killing in cold blood? Man... I must of really-." He was cut off as Seraph slammed his knee into his ribs.

 

Seraph started laying into his doppelganger, the sound of breaking bones echoing in the empty halls, along with the demented laugh of his clone, a red mist descending over his eyes. He grabbed him buy the neck and started to squeeze, the rage felt like an inferno in his head, all the while his clone smirking thought broken teeth. "That's... it... do it... kill me!" he choked out. "Then... you're... just... like... me."

 

The words cut through Seraphs rage like a hot knife, leaving behind a feeling of numb disgust and horror. Letting go, he stared at his hands, looking at them in disbelief. He had almost given in... almost killed him.

 

The clone looked up, his ruined face scowling at Seraph. "No... no... you are supposed to kill me." he spat a bloody goblet at him. "Don't... don't think... you are dragging me in."

 

Seraph looked at him blankly. "What... what do you mean?" he stammered out.

 

"They have me wired up... they heard everything we've said... and judging by the fact I haven't been medi ported out... " he trailed off, snickering.

 

Before Seraph could ask him what he meant, the clone threw back his head and let out a howl of laughter as his body burst into flames. Seraph feel back, flailing as the fire licked along his arms, as his clone became a towering inferno.

 

His clone looked at him, his laugh turning into a distorted gurgle as his body was consumed, the flames now burning out of control. Seraph triggered his med porter, dragging his eyes away from the bonfire his duplicate had become.

 

***

 

Talos Island

 

Seraph exited the hospital and blinked at the two people in business suits standing in front of him, he recognised as agent Nance, the other agent, a woman, wasn't familiar. 

 

Agent Nance stepped forward. "Mister Seraph, I would like to introduce you to my supervisor, Special Agent Jenni Adair. Your "good twin" saved her from your doppelganger, she also has something I believe you need to hear."

 

Eyeing them both, Seraph turned to Agent Adair. "Okay, what is it?"

 

She handed a plain folder to him. "We have identified the one responsible for your evil clone, ever hear of a villain called Protean?"

 

He nodded as he opened the folder and thumbed through the pages.

 

"He was believed to have been killed by Manticor, but with only his word to go on, we had some doubts. Recently he has resurfaced and appears to be working with the 5th column. Our sources indicate that he is the one responsible behind your clone and the string of crimes he committed."

 

Seraphs eye's narrowed. "Where is he?"

 

Agent Adair handed him another document. "While you were recovering, your clone was able to find him at a Portal corp facility and is now on his way to apprehend him."

 

Handing the folder back, Seraph turned to Agent Adair and asked one question. "Where?" 

 

"We believe that he's operating out of an old facility in the warehouse district-" before she could even finish, Seraph had pulled out a short range teleporter and was punching in coordinates. "Wait, take these." she quickly handed him a small black disk and a headset. "That's a Zig porter designed especial for Proteans genetic structure and a com-link tuned to your good clone's frequency. Good luck."

 

He nodded, before hitting the enter key and vanishing in a flash of light.

 

Agent Nance looked at Agent Adair. "Are you sure it was okay to let him charge off like that ma'am?"

 

She sighed. "No, but you saw the look in his eye. All we can hope now is that he doesn't get himself killed."

 

***

 

Later

 

Snarling, he lobed a grenade he scavenged from one of the dead soldiers round the corner into a mob of fifth troops. Shortly after he had entered the base, his clone had called him and filled in the blanks, Protean was some how working with Pretoria and was going to open a portal to let an army trough.

 

There was a dull thump and several scrams as the grenade went off. Jumping round, he let out a blast of energy, taking out the few survivors before running down the hallway. From what he could tell, the 5th was here to either cut a deal with Protean or kill him... either way, they were between him and his target.

 

He paused as he heard a crackle in his ear as his clone reported over the headset. "Crap... I wasn't able to stop them from activating the portal... they army, its coming." There was a burst of static and the familiar sound of an energy blast. "What the... . Shit... Seraph, the army... It's us!"

 

Before Seraph could call back, his ear piece let out a wail of static. Swearing her ran down the hall, his target was Protean, but he couldn't let his double go against an army of clones. Especially if they were as insane as the one he fought was.

 

Running down the hall, he spotted a door. With out even pausing, he let lose a blast that reduced it to slag and jumped through... into what looked like a slaughter house.

 

Twisted and broken bodies of fifth solders lied everywhere, while standing in the centre was Protean, his features hidden by the brim of his hat. "Ah, Dark Seraph, I have so been looking forward to this." His voice came in a dull whisper as he spread his arms. "Like my handy work? Apparently they didn't take my change of allegiance to well... given their history you think they would expect traitors in their midst by now."

 

Seraph narrowed his eyes. "I don't give a fuck about them, I'm here for you."

 

Protean threw back his head and laughed. "You think you can stop me? Not even Manticore could... and he's a big damn hero. What are you... a nobody." He paused, his face split into a twisted grin. "No... not entirely thanks to me. Now you're a monster, a brutal beast that should be put down like a wild animal."

 

Power crackled Seraphs hands as he let lose a blast of  pure white energy at Protean, the blast thing him high in the shoulder and ripping his arm off. Protean looks at the severed limb, then to Seraph and laughed. "Oh come on, is that the best you can do?"

 

The severed limb flopped around for a bit, before tendrils reached up from it and hooked into his shoulder. Seraph watched as the arm pulled on to Protean before reattaching it's self like nothing had happened. "See, you can't hurt me, so what are you hoping to achieve here?"

 

Seraph's hand glowed again as he let off another blast, but this time Protean was ready for it, he leaped up into the ceiling before shoot straight at him, smashing him to the ground. His fingers warped into talons as he grabbed Seraphs neck. "So then little Hero, what should I do first?"

 

Warning lights blinked on as there was a loud explosion from deep with in the base, protean looks around, his face twisting in anger. "So, you didn't come alone did you, got a little friend breaking my stuff? Well when were done here, I'll have to find your friend and kill him too." Seraph tried to break free, but protean just grinned. "Oh no, your not going anywhere yet." Holding his neck in one hand, he grabbed Seraphs left arm and squeezed.

 

There was a moment of resistance before a sicking loud crack echoed through out  the room, Seraph's arm flopped to the ground, Porteans grip breaking it like a twig. He smiled as Seraph bit down on his lip, trying not to scream in pain. "Scream out, come on." He slowly turned Seraphs arm, grinding the broken bones against each other. "I want to hear you beg like Galaxy girls sidekick did." His grin widening as Seraph let out a grunt of pain.

 

"Now then, what next?"

 

Seraph looks up and grinned slightly. "This." His right hand blurred and punched into Protean gut, there was almost no resistance, as if he was punching jelly. Protean laughed as he let go of Seraph and delivered a brutal back hand, causing stars to flash across Seraph's vision.

 

"Man, your clones where tougher than this. Maybe it wasn't worth sneaking in to get that sample." He grinning like a loon at the look of confusion on Seraphs face. "That's right, snuck right in to your hose, nice defences, but useless against me. Snuck right up to your room, saw you and your little girlfriend... maybe I should of used her instead, she might not have been so-" he was cut off as Seraphs knee jerked up between his legs.

 

Seraph threw his weight back, breaking out of Protean's grip and hitting the floor, a lace of pain shot through his arm. Another explosion rocked the base as he tried to get to his feet, looking around he saw protean glaring at him, his luminescent eyes filled with hatred.

 

"Well then, looks like there is a bit of fight in you after all." Protean spat as the air around him started to flicker and Seraph felt his ears pop. As he got to his feet, the air seamed to warp and a wave of pain washed over him, dropping him back to his knees. "Ya like that, special power I have, lets me sap your strength and power and use it for my self, it's how come I have such an easy time killing capes."

 

Seraph wiped his good hand across his mouth, and grinned slightly. "on problem with your little trick thought."

 

"Oh, and what's that?"

 

"Still have enough oomph left to do this."  Quickly tracing a rune on his chest, Seraph threw himself at Protean, warping his arm around as the spell triggered, making him ground zero for a Nova of pure energy. Protean's scream of pain and raged echoed in Seraphs ears before trailing off, as the light from the nova died down, seraph dropped to his knee exhausted, it was a risky spell to use, but it had worked.

 

He slapped the special Zig porter on Protean's head, watching his body vanish in a flash of blue light, then tapped his earpiece. The noise that greeted him sounded like a war zone. "Seraph... . Get..." There was a burst of static followed by what sounded like him screaming in pain as the single dropped in and out... "Got the... Detonator... only way... sorry... looks like... two worlds to look after."

 

Turning, Seraph ran Deeper into the base, praying he could reach the portal room in time. He tried to block out the pain from his injuries, after all the shit he had been trough today, he wasn't going to let himself die. Leaping over several dead fifth troops, he reached the portal room, just in time to watch his good clone slump in a pool of his own blood as the last of the bombs detonated. there was a blinding flash, a burst of pain.. then the darkness swallowing him, the burring sensation of failure being the last thing that went through his mind.

 

***

 

3 days later.

Seraph Residence.

 

Tish exited the elevator and saw Laz pacing the hallway, a look of concern on her face as she spotted her. "Thanks for coming Tish."

 

Tish nodded, Laz had called her up and told her what little she knew, that Seraph had come back from the hospital looking like he been through hell and back, then locked himself in his workshop. "Not sure what happened on that mission... . But it messed him up pretty bad... I've never seen him like this before... " she chewed her lip nervously, a slightly unsettling sight ash the scars on her face twitched. "Thought maybe he would talk to you?"

 

Tish reached up and patted the taller girl on the shoulder. "Okay, I'll see if he'll talk to me then." She headed to Seraph's workshop and went to knock on the door when it silently swung open. The room was dark, except for dull flickering light flicking from the forge, she carefully navigated through the assorted workbenches. She found him kneeling by the forge, his left arm in a cast as he scrawled a chalk circle on the floor.

 

She knelt next to him and gently taped him on the shoulder. "hey there, you all right?" she asked, then almost regretted the question as he turned and looked at her. his face was plaid and drawn, as if he hadn't slept in ages, while his eye's... they made him look old and worn out.

 

He blinked and smiled slightly. "Hey Tish, sorry, I was gonna call you... but got busy... need." He blinked sheepishly. "Needed to fix some wards on the house."

 

Tish looked at him and blinked. "How long have you been doing this?"

 

He pressed his hand to the floor, the runes glowing brightly as a wave of blue energy rolled out across the floor "It's Tuesday, right?"

 

"... Seraph, it's Thursday."

 

He blinked again, almost having trouble comprehending what she was saying. Sighing, Tish gabbed his arm and helped him onto a nearby couch. "What brought all this on?"

 

He slumped onto the couch, and took a deep breath. "Recently... some one broke in and... " He lent back. "He... he could of killed me in my sleep, but instead... he took some hair and made a clone." Slowly, Seraph recounted his dealings with S.A.M., his clones and Protean. "I don't know what to think, a monster like that... he got so close, he could of done what ever he wanted, to me... to the girls... to you... and the clone... . Something that... evil... was made from me."

 

She wrapped an arm around him. "You sound like you been trough Hell and back."

 

He nodded and continued. "And the other me... my "good" copy, He sacrificed himself to save this world from Protean's army... I... I'm not sure if I could ever do something like that... it's like I've seen two reflections of my self... one is twisted and warped, the other an ideal that I could never reach." he looked down at his feet, his face slack. "It made me feel I came up short... like maybe I'm not as good as I thought I was..."

 

She looked at him and grinned as an idea crossed her mind. "I think you need a brake."

 

He blinked dumbly. "Huh?"

 

"Listen to yourself. You've been stewing over this in the dark for several days and it's doing you no good, so you're taking a vacation, far away from Paragon."

 

He looked at her blankly. "What, just get up and leave?"

 

"Yeah, just like that."

 

"Where would I go? it's not like I can book some where nice on such short notice."

 

Tish looked thoughtful. "Hawaii maybe? Sun, surf, all that cheesy tourist crap, it be fun."

 

Seraph nodded as the idea sunk in. "yeah... a week or so away would be nice."

 

"So when do we pack?"

 

"Wait... "We?"

 

She smirked and rolled her eyes. "Someone has to make sure ya don't spend the whole time being miserable. Besides, I'm probably due a vacation myself."

 

Seraph blinked. "You and me off on a tropical island for two weeks... I guess that puts lounging on the beach with a book out?"

 

"Damn right, you will have fun if it kills you." She gave him a quick hug. "Now get up, have a shower and a shave and then well see if your awake enough to get something to eat, I'm gonna tell Laz your feeling better and she can stop worrying."


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  Plot Bunnies That SHOULD NOT BE!
Posted by: Epsilon - 05-29-2010, 02:46 AM - Forum: Other People's Fanfiction - Replies (12)

In this thread instead of coming up with a terrible crossover idea come up with a terrible fanfic idea in general. Bonus points for using as many horrible fanfic cliches as possible. Some examples:
Naruto Peggy Sues himself back in time but discovers he has traveled into an alternate timeline where he is stuck in Fem!Naruto and is stuck in a Time Loop centered around the Chunin Exams. Includes at least one vicious rape of Sasuke scene per chapter.
Edward Elric seals his brother's soul not in a suit of armor, but in the body of Roy Mustang! Homoerotic overtones abound between the two (three?). Includes absolutely no action scenes.
How was it that Aang survived one hundred years without aging? He's a VAMPIRE!
---------------
Epsilon

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  Pirates, Ninjas... and Bears?
Posted by: Bob Schroeck - 05-28-2010, 09:44 PM - Forum: General Chatter - Replies (3)

Oh my.
-- Bob
---------
Then the horns kicked in...
...and my shoes began to squeak.

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